Guns: As Armas da Vingança

"Guns" is a strange movie: its sensibilities seem to be both sexist AND feminist. On the one hand, almost all the women have to undress at one point or another, usually gratuitously; on the other hand, the girls-with-guns sequences are played without condescension, the female agents are treated as equal partners by the men and, more often than not, THEY take charge. The action is not particularly well-done; in fact the whole film plays as if it was directed by a teenage boy trying to make a "real" movie. But how can you hate a film that contains female oil wrestling, an interrogation done with the help of a magic hat, a grenade on a remote-controlled model boat AND the incomparable Danny Trejo as the villain's No.1 henchman? (**1/2)

When the character, Taryn was dropped, his movie afterward lost its comic timing.In every Andy Sidaris movies, it was Hope who provided the humor in the movie as well as good look. As much as I like Roberta Vasquez, she is no replacement for the much better tandem of Hope and Dona Speir in their movies. The director should have just kept Hope character along with the Dona Spear, while bringing along Roberta. Meanwhile Gun is good fun action that sometime dark with no humor to restraint it. It was Hope's Taryn that kept the action with little humor to keep it interesting. I hate to say this, the best Andy Sidaris movies with the female spies was with the pairing of Taryn and Donna Hamilton in the early parts of the series. The facial expression that Taryn gave in a tight situation was priceless, and it sadly why Gun doesn't hold up as well as Picasso Trigger or A Hard Ticket To Hawaii. Finally Gun is good on action, but it is boring without the humor and dark sarcasm that usually comes from Hope Marie Carlton's character, Taryn.

When I was a wee tot I never cared about superfluous things like plot, characterization or people yakkin' exposition for more than 30 seconds. What I wanted to see was the car chases, explosions, high kicks and bikini girls with machine guns. Happy happy happy, joy joy joy! Of course, one day we have to grow old and abide to the rules of Society, that forces us to become, uh, "sophisticated". We ditch Hollywood blockbusters in public and pretend to like Finnish art movies and David Lynch. But deep down inside, in the heart of that happy child we once were, we really want to get home in time for the Baywatch rerun. And that, friends and foes, is the spirit of Sidaris' work. I've seen the polls at IMDb and voters aren't fond of Andy's flims. They're completely missing the point AND the fun.

This film essentially begins with a South American crime lord by the name of "Juan Degas" (Erik Estrada) hiring two hitmen to kill a female federal agent named "Nicole Justin" (Roberta Vasquez). However, due to a last-minute wardrobe change, the two assassins end up killing a totally innocent person instead. This not only infuriates Juan, but it also triggers an immediate investigation by the federal agency Nicole works for as one of their own members named "Rocky" (Lisa London) was also killed in the attempt as well. What they don't realize, however, is that Juan is only getting started and he has assembled several men and compiled a vast arsenal of weapons to use in his murderous scheme of revenge. Now, rather than reveal any more, I will just say that this movie pretty much follows the same general pattern of several previous Andy Sidaris films which places a high priority on attractive and scantily clad actresses like Dona Speir (as "Donna Hamilton") and the newly introduced Roberta Vasquez taking the place of Donna's usual partner played by Hope Marie Carlton ("Taryn"). And although Ms. Carlton was probably the most attractive actress of the bunch, I have to say that the addition of Devin DeVasquez (as the villainous "Cash") almost made up for it. Be that as it may, much like the previous films in the series, the plot lacked depth and needed a lot more suspense or intrigue as the numerous action scenes were simply not sufficient to maintain interest for an extended period of time. That being said, while I don't consider this to be a bad film by any means, it still suffered from the same weaknesses as the others, and I have rated it accordingly. Slightly below average.

"Guns" was an easy way to kill an afternoon with some friends. The low budget action is passable but it's the women and the nudity that keep your attention. Not a lemon in the bunch. I don't plan on watching "Guns" again. I don't even think I'll remember much of it tomorrow. I do hope I remember what was maybe the greatest piece of dialogue ever: "Don't do something, stand there!" Honorable mention: a dreamy Roberta Vasquez.