Escola de Monstros

My review was written in February 1990 after watching the movie on RCA/Columbia video cassette.

This hokey horror spoof was made in 1988 but barely passes muster as a belated direct-to-video release.

Loaded down with voice-over narration and other clumsy devices, pic purports to mock the teen slasher genre but is as cliched as its forerunners.

Dumb cover story has a Mr. Armageddon from Outer Space visiting Earth (at Montgomery Sterling High School in L. A.)in pursuit of two jerks Dume and Glume from the planet Polyester who have stolen a doomsday device (that looks like a basketball).

Various monsters show up pointlessly and kill coeds until a basketball game of students versus monsters is organized. The kids win and stave off destruction for another thousand years.

Film's bad puns and silly attempts at horror are hard to take. Nondescript cast goes through the motions with the young women undoing their louses with clockwork regularity.

Overreliance on voice-over smacks of post-production tampering.

I saw this movie when I was eleven years old (when I liked basically every film I saw for some sort of reason) and thought it was the worst movie ever. Nowadays I'm not sure which film is worse this one ore urban menace, one thing is for certain though both have to be seen to be believed. So my advice is to buy both of em you should be able to find both of them really cheap and their worth every penny!!!! p.s. the true worst film ever is of course pearl harbor, but that one is so bad it isn't even funny anymore (in fact I don't think of it as a film, movie, flick or any of those I personally think it's what getting you soul ripped out of you must feel like) whereas these I think were intended by the makers to be so stupid you just have to see them and are still funny after repeated viewings (although not in a row!!!)

Lately I find myself hopelessly over the hill, frantically scrambling for vestiges of my long-gone youth to validate my current adult existence. Being that I'm only twenty makes this kind of hard, and besides, I spent my adolescence watching the Gilbert Gottfried magnum opus USA Up All Night. I remembered that as a youngster I enjoyed the Up All Night staple "Monster High", which usually aired after "Dr. Alien" or "Surf Nazis Must Die".

Watching it again now, I found it pretty stupid. I think the reason that I liked it as a ten-year-old was that this movie seems to have been made by ten-year-olds (not unlike "Bats"). It's packed with corny jokes and pointless scenes, and has some pretty awful acting, even worse and over-blown than Shannon Elizabeth in "Scary Movie", and that's no easy feat.

However, I must applaud the sheer volume of stuff that they packed into this, a "quantity over quality" sort of thing. This movie has got a mummy, a zombie, a killer computer nerd robot, a walking gargoyle, a huge, sentient clump of marijuana, shoes that eat people, and two aliens so annoying they seem to have come from Planet Charles Nelson Reilly. These ghoul's ring-leader is Mr. Armageddon, the embodiment of all evil, who kind of looks like a doughy, aged Corey Feldman.

Oh, I figured out another reason that I liked this- there's a cute girl playing the female love interest. What's odd is, the girl and her breasts are played by two different actresses, so every time a scene calls for nudity (which is often, remember, this was made by ten-year-old boys) they cut to a disorienting shot of a headless torso. This made me wonder: The gal playing the lead was pretty awful actress, but they wanted her so desperately that they were willing to let her use a body double? There was no other actress that was just as bad AND would show her breasts? Weird.

Anyway, this is a pretty simple-minded, innocuous bit of entertainment. The people making it were probably having a lot of fun, and there are a few funny bits (like the finale's "basketball on the rim" gag, worthy of a "Naked Gun" movie). If you're a little kid or a heavy drinker you'll probably love it.

I'd say that this is the worst movie I've ever seen, but I really have seen 3 or 4 worse movies.

That being said, this movie is still crap.

I'd go into detail, but this movie does not even deserve two minutes of your time (much less the hour and a half of your life that you will never get back).

Just... don't see it. Ever.

My friends and I rented this from Blockbuster, and ended up having to pay for it because when it was over we took the tape outside and shot it.

I found this movie very amusing, it's use of off-beat and cheesy humor is absolutely wonderful! I thought the abstract storyline was very well put together, and is not your typical 80's high school movie. It has all things that make a great movie, blood and gore (check out the excellent microwave scene!), nudity, campy humor, and it even has a killer pot plant! I highly recommend this movie to anyone. If you ever see it in your local video store, check it out, it rocks!