Submarino do Horror

Before "Snakes on a Plane" and "Snakes on a Train", there was this 1974 made-for-television mid-week suspender – snakes on a submarine (Fer-de-Lance is the name of the sub). When a happy go lucky seaman returns from shore leave with a shaman's gift of live snakes, he sets off a succession of catastrophes that places the stricken sub's surviving crew in peril, and forces reluctant hero Janssen to assume responsibility for an almighty mess, a job he clearly relishes as much as a poke in the eye.

As the sub flounders on the ocean floor, the remaining crew must make repairs to extricate themselves before the oxygen levels dissipate, while silently stalked by the highly toxic stowaways. Director Mayberry takes a rather old-fashioned approach with his limited material, focusing more attention on the salvage efforts than the snake threat which becomes the sub-plot in the latter half. The performances are strictly B-grade all round, and include one of Janssen's more ambivalent characterisations (though this was his trademark) as an uninspired, less-than enthusiastic naval instructor who's reluctantly foist into the captain's seat when all the senior officers are killed off during the initial catastrophe. Hope Lange is similarly propelled into heroine status, with her medical knowledge proving critical to the defensive effort against the marauding reptiles as one-by-one, the survivors are taken out. The movie labours to a mechanical conclusion, and though not without some intellect, the action is far too sporadic and there's little suspense.

It's perhaps no surprise that this largely forgettable TV movie has been resurrected in the wake of the "Snakes on a Plane" popularity, although it's well down the hierarchy of motion picture asps. A strong cast delivers intelligent dialogue, but the one-dimensional, melodramatic treatment sinks not only the submarine, but also the movie.

Fer De Lance (1974)

** 1/2 (out of 4)

The screw of a submarine has good and bad news. The good news is that they are stuck on the ocean floor with boulders holding them down. The bad news is an idiot brought several deadly snakes on board that can kill within minutes of their bite. This made for TV flick is pretty good for the first hour but after that thing get tad bit boring, although the ending is good. The second half takes the focus off the snakes, which I feel was a mistake. There's no real violence to speak of but the director uses this to his benefit. David Janssen and Hope Lange star.

Fer-De-Lance is a nice little suspenseful thriller. Snakes, called the Fer-de-Lance ("lance head" in French), is a generic name for vipers and quite poisonous. They have been sneaked on board a research submarine, coincidentally named Fer-de-Lance, by one of the crew to play a trick on the Captain. The snakes escape and bite a few of the personnel. Because of this, the sub loses control and sinks to the bottom of a South Ocean trench and also beneath a landslide. All of this happens within the first 20 minutes and the rest of the movie time is spent in the crew trying to evade the snakes and getting the sub loosened from the rocks.

This movie moves quickly and without much characterization. But that's okay, the characters, though they come from various races, mean nothing to the story. What's important is the race against time to re-surface the sub before it runs out of oxygen for the crew to breathe and before the snakes kill more crew members. What adds to the suspense is the musical score by Dominic Frontiere, which is spot on in catapulting the movie from scene to scene.

The only part of the movie that I'm critical of is the filming of the undersea scuba scenes. They are dark, sometimes out of focus and with debris flying in front of the camera blocking the action. I would think that's done to disguise the fact that the underwater set was small and a large submarine was not really used. But what was being accomplished got across to the viewer, so no harm. The movie is a nice little made-for-tv thriller.

FER-DE-LANCE is a made-for-TV movie starring David Janssen as the Officer in charge of a nuclear submarine. A routine mission turns catastrophic when a knuckleheaded crewmember (Frank Bonner) brings the titular serpents aboard. Death and disaster strike, leaving the sub stranded on the ocean floor.

For a network television production of this vintage, It's not bad at all. It's a horror-thriller, as well as a disaster / survival film. The snakes are well-utilized, and Mr. Janssen is the same rough-around-the-edges, unflappable character he always seems to play.

Co-stars the wonderful Hope Lange...

Back in 1974 when this TV-Movie first aired, I saw the first twenty minutes or so and was enthralled by the premise: A submarine trapped at the bottom of the ocean with a pack of deadly snakes slithering around. It seemed like a can't miss thriller. Because I was a kid though, I had to go to bed! I recently found the film on video and was ecstatic to finally see the whole show. However, I should have let my childhood dream of a can't miss thriller be as this movie was incredibly bad. It is very cheap looking, even for that time period and the actors play their scenes with so much indifference that it's hard to care about their plight. The biggest mistake is that the snakes are only peripheral to the plot. Most of the movie is taken up with the crew's attempts to dislodge themselves from the rocks they are trapped against, making it more of an adventure film than a thriller and it's not even a good adventure film. At least I now know why the film was so hard to find all of these years. WKRP fans might want to check it out for an early look at Frank Bonner (AKA Herb Tarlek) as the dopey sailor who brings the snakes aboard the sub.