Se Não Me Mato, Morro!

Directed by, and starring, Burt Reynolds, this is comedy about a salesman learning he has only months to live is in Woody Allen territory. The script has joke upon joke, few of them demanding to begin with, but then embellished by bits of business that are a little distracting.

Well, I'm giving the elements credit because it's not that easy to make a comedy about having a terminal illness. Dabney Coleman managed to inject a few funny boluses into "Short Time" but "The Bucket List" was a slapdash affair providing an excuse for two older (but sometimes magnificent) actors to do the things we wish we had done. I almost hate to say it but arguably the most entertaining comedy about dying is the Rock Hudson and Doris Day film, "Send Me No Flowers."

Burt's direction of "The End" is function and lapses only into one easy cliché -- a man wakes up sweating and thrusts his goggle-eyed face into the camera. He also drags out amusing moments. The script by Jerry Belson is fast and touches the bases. It may depend a bit much on obvious jokes -- "I told you not to cuss, Godammit." But it more than makes up for such weaknesses.

Eg., Burt goes to make his last confession. The priest is Robby Benson, who looks about fifteen years old. Burt uneasily explains that he has a little difficulty calling him "Father" so the priest suggests Burt just call him Dave. In the confessional, Burt begins with, "Bless me, Dave, for I have sinned." And when the priest isn't regaling Burt with his OWN confession about lust and ambition, he flosses his teeth while listening to Burt talk about infidelity. Burt is doing his best to get organized but there is the intermittent "pluck" and "plick" from the other side of the confessional window.

I really like Burt Reynolds. He's the least prepossessing movie star who ever breathed. Confident enough to be self deprecating in public despite his dark handsomeness. Cary Grant would never have made fun of his own ouvre the way Burt did at an Academy Award presentation by portentously rattling off a string of his own hits, like "Navajo Joe" and "Sam Whiskey."

He can handle serious drama well and with the proper plot he excels, as in "Deliverance." But his ordinariness doesn't seem to work well with comedy. What you get without cultivation is lowbrow slapstick that sometimes is more silly than witty. As a performer Burt has a certain range but comedy broaches the perimeter of possibilities.

For a guy diagnosed with a terminal disease, Burt Reynolds sure pumped a lot of life into this film.

This is the ultimate in black comedies, a man is told he's got a little over a year to live. We would all react in different ways. Burt Reynolds gets this cheerful bit of news and goes immediately berserk and starts acting all kinds of crazy.

Of course everyone around him sees him differently. Wife Joanne Woodward, girl friend Sally Field, parents Pat O'Brien and Myrna Loy. Burt pushes all their buttons except O'Brien who seems oblivious to all.

Reynolds always had a marvelous gift for comedy that in his prime period of the seventies was utilized rather well. His career seemed to go in the same path as Tom Selleck's, I think they could have played a lot of each other's parts.

Of course it was nice to see two veterans of old Hollywood, Myrna Loy and Pat O'Brien in support. They never disappoint.

My favorites though are Strother Martin as the officious head of a mental institution where Reynolds gets committed after some bizarrely unsuccessful suicide attempts and Dom DeLuise as another patient there.

DeLuise when he gets going approaches Robin Williams kind of zaniness and he was working on all cylinders in this film. He's ready to offer all kinds of help to Burt to fulfill his mission.

Death is serious business, no doubt. No moreso than the people who come in contact with it. In fact, is there ANYTHING funny about dying?

If you're Burt Reynolds and you find out you only have a few months left to live, then YES. And the evidence is in one of his maiden directing efforts, "The End".

As a terminally-ill man, Reynolds practically drives himself crazy trying to get his life in order and end it at the same time. However, he has to deal with an inattentive ex-wife (Woodward), flaky parents (Loy and O'Brien), an even-flakier girlfriend (Field), an overly-mature daughter (MacNicol), a dense lawyer (Steinberg), a novice priest (Benson) and a schizophrenic mental patient (DeLuise) who wants to help Reynolds reach his end goal in the worst way.

The topic is morbid, to be sure, but there are indeed (dark) laughs here. Reynolds' hand never falters and he makes the most of every scene he's in as a man who's at the end of his rope (literally, in one case) and can find no solace even in chasing down a funeral procession to find out what the guy in the hearse died of.

To say that DeLuise steals the movie isn't enough; he steals it, runs for the border, makes a clean getaway and never looks back. There is more bad taste to be had when we discover his character is Polish and Dom then rattles off a few bad Polish jokes to Reynolds. "Kids can be cruel", Reynolds consoles. "What kids", DeLuise responds, "I heard these from my parents!" How inspiringly nasty. My one favorite scene has to be where Dom tries to help Burt jump out of the bell tower in the mental institution he is incarcerated in (You're right: it's not high enough!"). It's great and there's a lot more scenes like that, sprinkled throughout.

For some of us, though, it's hard to laugh at suicide, let alone death. But the morbid, gallows humor here doesn't celebrate death like a lot of bigger-budget movies do - this is a movie about life, living and doing everything you can while you have the chance. And THAT is really what "The End" is about - not the end but everything you do before the end gets here. And in that respect, Burt succeeds.

Eight stars and a golden noose for "The End" - the movie that'll make you love life...and think twice about coming near Dom DeLuise with a Polish joke. Ever.

This was, without a doubt, the most hilariously comic performance that the brilliant Dom DeLuise had on film. When, in the midst of a depressed "woe is me" rant, he looks up and asks "Do you think we'll ever switch to the metric system?", well, it just don't get no funnier than that. His botched suicide attempts, as well as his eagerly wanting to help Burt with HIS suicide, oh heck, just go rent it yourself! You'll love it.

Burt was brilliant too. He holds a thin line between wanting to die and wanting to live that is believable. It's a real shame that this movie often gets me blank stares when I tell others about it. More people know about Four Weddings and a Funeral (a movie so horrid that I still refuse to watch another Andie McDowell flick) than this quiet classic. (sigh)

Everyone remembers this one, esp the scene at the loony bin window where Dom Delouise is hellbent of finishing Burt off, Burt has second thoughts about plummetting to his death, and so on. That alone is great. Kirsty McNichols was also very good too. (I was too young when I saw it to appreciate the presence of Myrna Loy and Joanne Woodward, and so I do look forwards to seeing it again in fact)

I also can remember seeing David Steinberg doing his whacked out shrink routine-'Get off of me!', etc. too. He is kinda forgotten now but a funny guy nonetheless.

So yeah, I do recommend this to anyone who wants to see an underrated Reynolds flick, it really is pretty good.

***