Óculos? Para Quê?

Can I Do it 'till I Need Glasses? at the very least proves the point that anyone can make a movie. Talent is not a consideration. The folks who unleashed this wretched pile of spewing vomit upon the world, lack any semblance of talent, taste or intelligence. The target audience must consist of the recently labotimized, and infants who play with their own feces. Anyone else would be far too world wise to get even a snicker out of this film. It consists of a series of sophmoric skits in which the punchline does not even extend to the obvious. It ends at the ludicrous. The jokes told are the types of jokes that elementary school children tell (usually potty or sexually related) where they don't know the meaning of all of the terms they use. You know, like the one about daddy's car and mommy's garage. To apply any sterner method of criticism would be pointless, since the usual standards of acting, writing, direction and such have never even been heard of by the creative "minds." behind this mess. Not to be judgemental, but anyone who enjoyed this film should seriously reflect upon their purpose on this earth.

No real plot to this one, just a series of short skits acting out some VERY old jokes. I chuckled once or twice in the beginning, much to my chagrin. But even at only 73 minutes this film wears out it's welcome before too long and becomes stale and tedious (with some nudity sprinkled in here and there to keep you awake). Still as bad as this movie is (and that's pretty putrid), it's a comedic gem compared to pretty much ANYthing by Aaron Seltzer & Jason Friedberg (Date movie, Epic movie, Meet the Spartans) Also the song is sadly kind of catchy in a sad way.

Eye Candy: 11 pair of tits, 3 bushes, 3 asses

My Grade: D

Code Red DVD Extras: Original trailer for this film; and trailers for "Beyond the Door", "Dead Pit", "the Farmer", "obsessed Ones", "Power Play", "Sole Survivor", & "Wacky Taxi"

Here's a comedy comprised of short, sexually suggestive skits. Sounds corny? It's meant to be goofy. It's one of those films for which I could guess the plot exactly before I saw it. Never in my life have I laughed so hard! I really like this type of film, as it reminds me of Austrian comedies where it's more about the characters and their environment. It is simple yet effective and you'll likely like it at least a bit. Strong cast pulls the most out of mediocre material. I like all of the comedians. The people who put this one together really knew what they were doing. My final rating for this one is seven out of ten.

An update of the skits and jokes you would have seen on a Burlesque stage in the first half of the 20th Century. It's a string of several jokes acted out. Some of them you could tell your Grandmother, some of them not, but it's a fairly safe bet she's heard them all before. For what it tries to be, it's not too bad. Before you rent it, remember that it's an older style of entertainment and has more value as history than as comedy or titillation. Robin Williams has a couple of bits, but he's interchangeable with the other players.

I saw this when I was sixteen years old and perhaps this was the reason I found this sketch based film so very amusing and I can still remember some of the sketches more than half a lifetime ago

Man in nudist colony with back to camera hands two female nudists two cups

" Coffee ? "

" Thank you "

" Donuts ? "

" Thank you "

Guess where the donuts are being kept ? Ha Ha Ha . That sums up the level of humour and my favourite joke involved the Lone Ranger who is bitten by a rattlesnake while urinating ( Guess what part of his anatomy got bitten ? ) so sends Tonto to get medical help . He manages to go into town a find a doctor who tells him that the only way to treat snakebite is " to suck out the poison " so Tonto goes back to find find The Lone Ranger :

" What did he say "

Tonto sees his friend lying in sheer agony : " He said ssss , he said sss , he said you're going to die Kemosabi "

When asked most fans of this movie will admit the bus sketch is their favourite moment where a man sits on a crowded bus reading a porn mag . He unzips his pants and starts to masturbate . Yeah I know it's crude and near the knuckle even if the camera is locked onto a medium shot of the man's face but the joke works because it becomes long running . After the initial scene it cuts away to several more sketched then returns to the man who is more and more excited at pleasuring himself . Cut away to a couple more sketches then back to the bus which has now stopped with most of the passengers running out screaming . Back to a couple of more sketches then back to the bus with an overly excited man then back to the bus where he reaches a climax . In a state of sexual relief he pulls out a packet of ciggies and sticks one in his mouth . Thoughtfully he turns to the one remaining passenger on the bus , a priest and asks " Excuse me father do you mind if I smoke ? " The picture freezes and a caption and voice over is played - " You meet the nicest people on a bus "

Hey guys I saw this when I was sixteen . Don't blame if me if CAN DO IT TILL I NEED GLASSES hasn't dated well