La banda del gobbo

When it comes to Italian crime films, Umberto Lenzi is undoubtedly the king of the Italian Polizi sub-genre, and while this film doesn't quite live up to the ones that went before it; Brothers Till We Die is still an interesting and entertaining little film that is sure to please fans of this sort of stuff. This was the last of Lenzi's crime collaborations with the great Tomas Milian, and it's also the most ambitious use of the actor. Here, Milian is given the task of playing two brothers, but since this is a cheapo Italian effort where special effects weren't really affordable, the effect is generated entirely through editing, and it has to be said that Lenzi does a good job. The plot is somewhat routine and simply follows a familiar revenge curve. Francesco and Vincenzo are brothers; Francesco is a bum better known as "Pigsty" and Vincenzo is a hunchback who gets called "Humpo" (you gotta love Italians!). The plot focuses more on Vincenzo, a wanted man who "rears his hump" in order to commit another robbery. However, things don't go to plan as his accomplices decide to shoot him (he's too noticeable, and therefore runs a risk of getting them all caught). Vincenzo manages to drag himself into a sewer, and then proceeds to get revenge...

The film doesn't feature the greatest script ever written (not even the greatest script ever written for a trashy Italian film!), but the silly dialogue is often very funny and the film's absolute disregard for political correctness when it comes to the lead character's disfigurement is just great. Obviously, a lot of this film's success (or lack of) rests on the shoulders of Tomas Milian, and despite being given a rather heavy role; he doesn't manage to turn a great performance. His "Pigsty" character is a messy imitation of the "Garbage Can" character from Free Hand for a Tough Cop, while the hunchback character is a lot more like Milian's forte; but the make-up intrudes on the performance, and neither one comes off particularly well. However, I'd much rather have Tomas Milian in the role than anyone else, and he does always make the film worth watching in spite of its shortcomings. The plot flows nicely enough throughout and it's usually entertaining. Lenzi has also seen fit to throw in a sub-plot revolving around the hunchback's attitude towards his disability, which feels a bit odd but works fairly well nonetheless. Overall, this is a decent enough slice of Italian police action and I'm sure most people that see it will enjoy it.

Tomas Milian returns in a pseudo-sequel / return to the universes of both FREE HAND FOR A TOUGH COP and ROME ARMED TO THE TEETH by reprising BOTH his roles from those films (albeit with the edges rounded out and the violence watered down in favor of comedy). This Eurocrime-iverse combination predates Marvel universe movies by at least three decades, though I wish I could say with more entertaining results.

Long before we got double the Van Damage in no less than five films, Tomas Milian handled a dual role accomplished largely through editing in this silly polizio-turkey. I have to point to one surprisingly effective VFX splitscreen shot where Milian talks to himself, just as I have to point out the tremendously terrible and distracting wigs Milian wears throughout the duration. Isa Danieli as Hunchback-Milian's stripper girlfriend puts in a heartfelt performance, and Italian voice actor Pino Colizzi puts in decent work as the requisite police inspector though he does feel like a cheap substitution for Maurizio Merli.

As it is, BANDA DEL GOBBO is a goofy and oddly nonviolent film you have to be in the right mood for. It's interesting to see Lenzi's usual cast of henchmen and character actors a little out of part, with this film bouncing back and forth between comedy and crime with varying degrees of success, but by and large it just feels embarrassing for both Milian and Lenzi, especially when considering their previous teamings. This would be their final film together.

Watch for: Francesco D'Adda (the "Where's Waldo" of Eurocrime movies") as Nurse Ratchet in a scene that spoofs ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST. This scene also includes a cameo by Jimmy il Fenomino, Italy's irritating answer to Andy Kaufman. Pierangelo Civera gets one of the better parts of his career as an undercover looney in the bin trying to make friends with Garbage Can-Milian in order to track down where Hunchback-Milian is, and suffers tremendous indignity as a result.

Umberto Lenzi gets his money's worth out of Tomas Milian by having him play twin brothers in their last collaboration. Not only twins - one of them is a bank robbing hunchback to boot!

The subtly named Humpo has come back to Rome after spending nearly two years in Corsica, and he's out for one big score. His gang thinks that's a great idea, but they also think that it's a good idea to put a bullet in Humpo's back as he's the most recognisable criminal in the whole country. Humpo is no fool, however, and escapes into the sewer with revenge on his mind...

This is basically the Tomas Milian show all the way, with Humpo being an angry, resourceful, righteous maniac who rolls about in piles of filth, takes great pleasure in outsmarting those who have double-crossed him, while all the while showing incredible love for his girlfriend Maria (who delights in helping Humpo out). The greatest scene in the film is when Humpo takes Maria out on a date and he takes her on the dancefloor, while all the rich folk around him start laughing and mocking him. Humpo seems to revel in it at first, much to Maria's horror, but then the tables are soon turned.

Humpo's twin brother Pigsty is a lot more subdued and docile, but he still shows he can outsmart people too. He gets his own subplot here as he gets sent to a mental asylum while covering for Humpo, and gets the more emotional scenes towards the end of the film.

Those looking for action might be let down though. There's not much here. This is known as a lesser Lenzi Eurocrime film, but think about how high he set the bar for himself.

Tomas Milian stars in this poliziottesco and he plays a dual role as scumbag twin brothers!; given that I too have a twin brother, I could totally relate to their love/hate relationship!

The lead character is a creepy-looking hunchbacked gangster (sort of a cross between Richard III and John Barrymore's Hyde in the 1920 version of DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE!) - who, actually, had already featured in Lenzi's ROME ARMED TO THE TEETH (1976); his brother is the dim-witted and more overtly comical "Monnezza", decked out in bum's clothing and sporting a particularly ridiculous Afro-wig (for him, this was the third and last appearance)! This is the first film I've watched for either of them and all I can say is that I was a lot more intrigued by the antics of The Hunchback...

The action scenes (often involving The Hunchback alone as "Monnezza" is useless in such situations - though he gets the last laugh!) deliver the goods but, even if the latter's low brand of comedy never really takes centre-stage, the film is still unbalanced by these scenes (though one in particular is quite inspired - when he's brought in for questioning at a police station and, in his feverish state of mind, mistakes a bearded hippie who's been arrested for Christ and thinks that he has died and gone to Heaven)! With respect to The Hunchback, the disco scene where he's ridiculed by the establishment's habitual bourgeois customers - to their eventual regret - introduces an unexpected poignancy into the fray (especially with the impassioned speech he delivers to them at gunpoint!), which suggests that the film-makers' intention was perhaps more serious than the end result would indicate...

As a matter of fact, star and director allegedly fell out during the making of this film (their sixth 'collaboration' in 4 years!) and, indeed, rather than sticking to a script Milian virtually improvised all his dialogue as he went along!! Besides, The Hunchback's nemesis here - Commissioner Sarti - is mostly ineffective (making a poor substitute for Maurizio Merli or even Luc Merenda) while the finale shamelessly rips off THE WAGES OF FEAR (1953)...but, at least, it does feature a typically bouncy score by Franco Micalizzi!

Ah, Mr. Umberto Lenzi … The man is a legend and a personal hero of mine, but I can't deny that "Brothers till we Die" is one of the most pointless and overlong Italian cult flicks I ever had to endure in my life. Lenzi single-handedly was responsible for copious amounts of notorious horror movies an he even is the second best Italian director in the field of violent crime movies (after Fernando Di Leo, hands down), but "Brothers till we Die" just looks as if it's a quickly scripted and nonchalant project to kill some spare time. The film suffers from a (too) thin storyline and – even worse – it carries on even long after the basic storyline has ended. Approximately 75% of the film is purely pointless padding where absolutely nothing happens apart from cult-veteran Tomas Millian giving a one-man double role show. He portrays the hunchbacked crime-lord of a big city as well as his docile brother with a nasty beard. Quasimodo-Millian plots a tremendously big heist, but he quickly gets double-crossed by his associates. He then engages his brother and uses him to fulfill his vengeance plans. Everything, from the planning of the heist over the treason and even the revenge itself, takes place during the first hour of the film, but for some inexplicable reason the story continues for yet nearly another full hour and it revolves on … absolutely nothing at all. The second half of the film simply depicts – in annoyingly great detail – the love/hate relationship between the Marazzi-twins but it's uninteresting, dull and entirely without excitement. "Brothers till we Die" is a complete embarrassment compared to "Almost Human" (Lenzi's ultimate crime-masterwork) and it's sometimes even difficult to accept the same cinematic "genius" made both movies. There's a severe lack of violence in this movie, the characters don't really have enough sadistic baggage and there's only ONE car-chase, which isn't even that impressive. Where's all the excitement? What happened to sleazy and politically incorrect sub plots? Where's all the stylish photography and lurid musical guidance? And, the most important question of them all remains: Who was the guy in the director's chair and what did he do to Umberto Lenzi?