Capitão Apache

At first when accidentally stumbling upon "Captain Apache" on late night TV and knowing absolutely nothing about it, I derived it would be a story similar to the one told in "A Man Called Horse" (and thus also a predecessor to "Dances with Wolves") and revolving on a white man fighting alongside the oppressed Indians. What else do you expect from a film with a title like that? It quickly becomes obvious this isn't the case, and the titular Captain (the almighty Lee Van Cleef), is simply an eccentric loner but a genuine Indian. He works as an Army officer, but none of the white cowboy-machos respect him because he's a "Redass" and the Indians don't trust him because he does a white man's job. He even has to remove his uniform whilst talking to the Indians, resulting in a shameless and gratuitous naked Van Cleef scene. The whole movie searches for the meaning of the words "April Morning", and the dialogs in the script make damn sure you don't forget them as they're repeated approximately every 7,5 seconds. April and Morning were the last words of a dying officer and they are believed to have an important significance. Captain Apache investigates and quickly becomes entangled in a large-scaled conspiracy of Mexican gun smugglers, quality prostitutes, corrupt army commanders and … genuine witches! The plot is often needlessly convoluted and I easily admit I didn't bother to comprehend everything, especially because the basic premise is rudimentary simple and actually gets revealed already in the two-line plot synopsis here on this site. How absurd is that? Throughout the whole film the words "April Morning" bathes in an aura of mystery and their meaning is successfully kept secret until five minutes before the ending, yet around here the whole film is bluntly summarized in two sentences. "Captain Apache" is overall very forgettable, but it does feature a couple of brilliantly comical moments (Van Cleef's drinking contest with the freaky twin bodyguards or his acid trip inside the witches' cavern), some decent shootouts and – not to forget – two songs sung by no less than Lee Van Cleef himself. This is the only time Lee was ever credited as a singer and that trivia aspect alone makes "Captain Apache" a curious must-see for fans of Euro-westerns. The presence of cult-siren Carroll Baker ("Baba Yaga", "Knife of Ice", "Bad", "Cyclone"…) as every male character's love interest is another good reason for avid cult fanatics to track down this nonetheless mediocre film.

In spite of continuing abuse from the surrounding people the army life has obviously made good to Van Cleef. The hair from his upper lip has moved on the top of his head, multiplied and grown darker in color. He has never looked as good, relaxed and fast with women. He has never looked as much a comic book westerner either. Check out the fancy leather jacket and how he sucks in his whole belly while posing in a loin cloth.

Now seriously, this is a funny western without really being a western comedy. The cast and the director must have had a lot of fun too doing this and getting paid for it. The heavy hallucination scene jumps out as the most fun, even though the whole film seems like a mad dream. It is like something lifted out of a really old comic book. Gladly, I like a lot of comics and movies that are so bad they transform into good in a whole another context. All the like minded cultured ones, be informed.

By the way, the story of this film brings to mind something similar from Jean Giraud's great Blueberry comics albums. And the excellent movie 'Blueberry' having been hailed as the first psychedelic western with mushroom munching... sorry, Captain Apache kind of got there first. And he sings too!

Spanish production from director Alexander Singer, an inferior descendant of the spaghetti western taken from S.E. Whitman's book, has Apache Indian Lee Van Cleef, an Army Captain in the Old West, butting heads with a shifty-eyed land baron (Stuart Whitman) who is predictably up to no good. Cheaply-made, and with laughable dubbing, though with a great deal of eccentric characters and intentionally-funny dialogue. Odd to see method player Carroll Baker in these dusty surroundings, but she's very energetic. Fans of Sergio Leone's vastly smoother and more slick genre epics will nevertheless find a decent movie companion here. ** from ****

Alexander Singer's "Captain Apache" of 1971 is often regarded as one of the worst Eurowesterns ever made. I am a Spaghetti Western enthusiast, and I've seen many many Eurowesterns (I won't call this a Spaghetti Western, since it's not an Italian production, and neither the director nor the supporting actors are Italian) and I agree that Captain Apache is certainly a bad movie, although I would not go so far to call it one of the worst Eurowesterns. It actually has some very funny moments, and if you regard it as a comedy more than a Western that is supposed to deliver suspense, gunplay, atmosphere whatsoever, it will definitely entertain.

Lee Van Cleef is one of my favorite actors, this movie provides the exceptional opportunity to hear Van Cleef sing. His singing qualities are terrible, he sings two songs in this movie "April Morning" and the main theme, "Captain Apache". While "April Morning" is very funny to her because it sounds so damn terrible when Lee Van Cleef sings, "Captain Apache" is far from good, but not that horrible, since he doesn't sing but just speaks the text in this one.

Van Cleef doesn't have his trademark mustache in this one, he plays a native American army captain, Captain Apache, and is constantly referred to as 'redass' by other characters in this movie. The only other Spaghetti Western Regular in "Captain Apache" is José Bólado, whom Spaghetti Western fans should know for his role in Sergio Corbucci's masterpiece "Django" of 1966. I also recognized Dan Van Husen, who played one half of a pair of flamboyant, idiotic (and hilarious) twins in this, I had seen him in "Light The Fuse... Sartana Is Coming" and in "Cut Throats Nine".

All things considered, "Captain Apache is a bad film, if you consider it as a Spaghetti Western and expect qualities like great style, a cool score, suspense and gunplay or interesting Antihero characters. It works as a comedy, however, and I don't even think that most of the hilariously stupid elements were unintentional. I personally think that the director was quite aware that he was directing a very cheesy flick, and he probably tried to compensate the unintentional comedy factors by adding (admittedly cheesy) humor that was quite intentional. I don't have the slightest doubt that Lee Van Cleef was 100 % aware that this would be one of his worst, if not his worst film, and he took it with a sense of humor and tried to make the best out of it.

I recommend "Captain Apache" to Eurowestern fans, simply for the fun factor and for the opportunity of hearing Van Cleef sing. People not familiar with the Spaghetti Western genre, avoid this, and watch the genre masterpieces with Lee Van Cleef such as "The Good, The Bad And The Ugly" (one of the greatest movies ever made and my all-time favorite), "For A Few Dollars More", "The Big Gundown", "Day Of Anger" or "Death Rides A Horse" instead.

Don't expect anything that could be taken seriously, but I still recommend this to my fellow Spaghetti Western fans, just for the heck of it. Lee Van Cleef is always worth the time. 4/10

Produced by America and Spain, this stars Lee Van Cleef as a Union Army... Apache Captain (!) He's out to discover the meaning behind "April Morning" , a dying agent's last words. With very few leads, he starts a tense alliance with a corrupt gun-runner named Griffin (Stuart Whitman), but finds he'll have to work quicker if he's to find out information as his contacts have a rather annoying habit of dying - and just before they tell him as well. The film also stars Carroll Baker (Giant, The Big Country) and Percy Herbert, a bit-part Brit-actor who featured in "Mutiny on the Bounty" (1962) and a couple of "Carry On..." films.

The action scenes here work well, and the humour (mostly intentional) is fairly amusing. Many of the scenes are filled with tension - and the mystery of April Morning is played out well enough to sustain interest and keep you gripped right 'till the end. The music is hardly in the traditional style most westerns follow, although saying that the soundtrack is fine as it includes the novelty of hearing Van Cleef sing "Captain Apache" and "April Morning" with whom, if the lyrics are to be believed, he apparently has a date.

I found this film really enjoyable and very entertaining. After viewing it, I can't get the title song out of my head, although that's most likely a negative point. With the right amount of action and suspense, and a dollop of good humour, this is a movie for little boys of all ages. Recommended.