A Despedida

A beautiful portrayal of a long farewell and an insight into the difference between western an eastern culture. Powerful performances through and well worth a watch.

Billi Wang (Akwafina) is a young aspiring writer in New York whose family had immigrated from China when she was six years old. She maintains a happy telephone relationship with her paternal grandmother, Nai Nai (Zhao Shuzhen) who still lives in China in the city of Changchun. Billi's family has received news from another relative that Nai Nai is dying of lung cancer. The extended families travel to Changchun to celebrate the wedding of Billi's cousin although the collective intention is really to say goodbye to Nai Nai - while withholding the news from her that she is dying.

Throughout the film - and especially by the end, it is very clear that is biographical and based on the experiences of the film's talented writer/director Lulu Wang. The story is rich for various reasons including its unique take on the universal theme of dealing with the impending death of a beloved elderly relative.

Billi is also a stand-in for many "new world" North Americans who would find it terribly wrong to withhold from anyone the fact that they are dying. Her points are well expressed but so are the contradictory replies from her elders and those more in line with a Chinese cultural tradition of such secrecy. The reply to the question "who's right" is answered in Nai Nai's laid-back, content demeanour (when not coughing), totally oblivious to her diagnosis. This is one of the fascinating surprises of "The Farewell" in its acquiescence to old-world values in subtle ways. Here, Wang must be given credit for her humility. She seems to have nodded to a sarcastic quote attributed to Oscar Wilde: "I am not young enough to know everything".

The main story is powerful enough; yet Wang adds to the wealth by delving into the immigration experience - for those who left their homeland as well as those left behind. Here again, she takes on a universal theme. In conversations and monologues, the viewer hears what it is like to lose all of one's children (two sons in this case) as they leave the homeland (Nai Nai's other son emigrated to Japan). Billi also has a powerful monologue of what it was like to leave behind an extended family and community when she was six. While intelligently avoiding platitudes, the film asks: is there really a 'better life' somewhere else?

The fine cast does justice to Wang's eloquent story. Awkwafina fits well in the lead role and Zhao's Nai Nai is so loveable that she makes it very easy to see why so many would grieve her impending death. One particular scene stands out even though it is brief: Billi's mother (Diana Lin) quietly avoiding eye contact in a taxi while fighting back tears. In less than a minute, Lin conveys an experience of every adult at least once in our lives. - dbamateurcritic

RATING: 9 out of 10

OUTSTANDING ACHIEVEMENT: Screenplay by Lulu Wang

'The Farewell (2019)' is proudly based on an actual lie, one told (and apparently maintained to this day) by director Wang's own family. It's perhaps no wonder, then, that the film feels so thoroughly realistic, despite its somewhat outlandish central conceit. It's, essentially, a slice-of-life drama concerning a worldly Chinese family's attempts to grieve in secret, focusing specifically on Chinese-American Billi as she tries her best to conflate her 'westernised' ideas with her family's 'eastern' wishes. This theme is delicately explored and its conclusions are wonderfully accepting, but it sits firmly as the backdrop for the sometimes strained, yet always loving, family dynamics on display. Everything just seems so grounded, with relationships that feel so lifelike you could almost swear they were real. This makes the experience subtle yet stirring. Often, it mirrors everyday life all too closely. The piece isn't always riveting, or ever conventionally exciting, but it's always enjoyable and often emotionally resonant. By its end, it's hard not to have been moved. In fact, you may not realise just how much it has touched you until just before its credits roll. 7/10

Billi (Awkwafina) is a 30 year old pianist in New York City. She's struggling after being rejected for a scholarship. She and her parents moved to America when she was young. She is mostly Americanized. News come that her grandmother is dying of cancer. Her family agrees to go the traditional route of hiding the diagnosis from the dying grandma. They are going home to China to fake a wedding celebration. Billi is reluctant to go with the lie.

This is a great cultural story. It's the Chinese culture but also the influence of Western culture. It's a family story. It's also Awkwafina's best acting performance yet. Her inner conflict and her family conflict are both very compelling. There are funny little insights. It's a very touching film. I would modify the ending a little. Looking back at Nai Nai as they drive away is such a powerful scene. The movie should probably end there. The scream is not a good way to end especially with the text reveal in the closing credits. If they want to go back to Billi for the ending, it should be something more positive considering what Nai Nai tells her during the banquet.

The Farewell is such a great film. It opened my eyes to a very thought provoking element of Chinese culture and was full of poignancy, humour, and heart.

We follow a family grappling with grief and the way that the film deals with this is so unique and engaging. All of the characters had a part to play in contributing to the story and adding to the film, but the central relationship is between Awkwafina's Billi and her grandmother. It's a very human, believable, and relatable relationship which drives the film and injects so much heart and emotion. It was beautiful to watch.

The screenplay is quite minimal, with not a huge amount of dialogue, but it doesn't need it. It manages to convey its meaning and purpose through other mediums, and is highly accomplished in this way.

I also loved the direction and cinematography of The Farewell. It felt very clean, very arty, and was just great to look at.

A very powerful film exploring familial love and grief in a sensitive, unique, and tender way.