Iron Cross: The Road to Normandy

Ever seen those home made YouTube vids where teenagers make a 5 minute war movie so they can pretend to be a hero? It helps them forget that they're the runt that gets bullied every day.

Imagine if one of them was given a few thousand dollars? This is what they'd make.

The directing is so bad, lots of pointless close ups on bad actors. The special effects are laughable and not special at all.

I have no idea about the story because I lasted less than 10 minutes. But considering the clichés it started with I was certain that it wasn't going to get any better.

At best this is a late night made for TV film for a low budget station, nothing more.

I like war movies and I'm very lenient, but this one is just too terrible. Reverse angle on the filing, and the numbers are backwards... Bad acting... obvious he actors never fired a gun before... bad special effects...

I tried... I tried really hard, but I only lasted 10 minutes before I gave up on this one.

I rarely write reviews but felt compelled to here. The film obviously had quite a good budget, given the amount of original (mostly) tanks, artillery and weapons shown and whilst it tried very hard to be realistic it failed in the basics. The first 40 minutes or so was a mainly non-stop battle scene where the heroic Germans had been pinned down and surrounded for some time, yet, everything was pristine. No rust on the barb wire, posts freshly cut, everyones uniform was spotless, most laughable the medical officer who wore red cross bib and armband that were immaculately white. Same thing when the action swaps to Normandy. I'm not being over picky here but as ex-forces I know that after 10 days of simulation we looked like tramps. This cleanliness took away for me any resemblance of reality and I feel a good chance to make a good film was wasted here. Also, terrible acting, bad sound, tedious music, awful effects and no real plot.

Interesting premise; WWII, promising action on the Eastern front and in Normandy. Could this be 'Cross of Iron' meets 'Saving Private Ryan'?

No it isn't!

This must be the worst war film I've ever watched. So bad it's good? - well nearly, it takes itself too seriously for that.

So poorly acted it looks like a comedic parody, sets and costumes are at AmDram levels e.g. All the soldiers uniforms on the Eastern front are clean and laundered (even the nurse's stockings look fresh out of the packet). Yet, the coastal gun emplacements in France look 80years old when really they would have been built <2yrs earlier.

Whatever qualities the move may either have or lack, the listing shows Odessa, Russia, as the filming location. It's Odessa, Ukraine, despite Putin's efforts to make it part of Russia.