- Terry: Time flies.
- Gatsby Welles: Yes, unfortunately, it flies coach.
- Terry: What's that supposed to mean?
- Gatsby Welles: It's not always a comfortable trip.
- Gatsby Welles: I need carbon monoxide to survive.
- Ashleigh Enright: What are you talking about?
- Gatsby Welles: We are two different creatures, right? You like the sound of crickets and I like the rattle of the taxis. You blossom in the sun and me, I come into my own under gray skies.
- Chan Tyrell: Listen, Gatsby, let me tell you, you only live once. But once is enough if you find the right person.
- Gatsby Welles: One thing about New York City: You are here or you are nowhere. You cannot achieve another level of anxiety, hostility, or paranoia anywhere else.
- [last lines]
- Gatsby: How did I know you'd be here?
- Chan: You didn't think I was going to blow this moment did you?
- Gatsby: What about the skin doctor?
- Chan: Very handsome, very rich, and very clever. But I'm here.
- Gatsby: For a kisser, there's a maximum of an 8?
- Chan: It's fall. By spring I'll have you up to 10.
- Ashleigh: Oh my God, you're Francisco Vega!
- Francisco Vega: Is that good or bad?
- Ashleigh: My roommate thinks you're the best thing to come along since the morning-after pill.
- Roland Pollard: [during his interview with a clueless college reporter] Would you like a scoop?
- Ashleigh: [hesitantly] Of what?
- Gatsby Welles: It's rich housewives who have the leisure to pursue esoteric culture. The out-of-work, discussing the out-of-print.
- Gatsby Welles: I read. I just don't read what they give us in school. I mean, do I really care who wins between Beowulf and Grendel? No, I don't. Maybe if I had a little money on it.
- Ashleigh Enright: You're a free creative spirit, like Van Gogh, Rothko, or Virginia Wolf. Of course, they all committed suicide.
- Roland Pollard: It's a very sweet thing to say, Ashleigh.
- Ashleigh: He's unusual. Quaint. That's the word I would use to describe Gatsby: quaint. He's exotic. Searching, shall we say, for his romantic dream from a vanished age.
- Connie: You know, this isn't about sex.
- Ted Davidoff: It's always about sex. Everything's about sex.
- Connie: All right.
- Ted Davidoff: The economy's about sex.
- Ted Davidoff: Well, he's not at the hotel, and he didn't show up for the press interview. So, he's wallowing in self-loathing somewhere, drinking Courvoisier, thinking up new ways to screw up our work.
- Ashleigh: First of all, I'd just like to say what an honor this is for me. I just want to say you're by far the most interesting American director.
- Roland Pollard: Thank you.
- Ashleigh: I write in the arts for a paper and I always put you right in the class with Renoir and DeSica.
- Roland Pollard: I'm surprised to hear that someone your age is familiar with Renoir and DeSica.
- Ashleigh: Film is my total thing. I've seen all the American classics. Particularly the Europeans. Kurosawa is my favorite. Technically, he is not European, technically, he's, obviously, Japanese. But, you really speak to my soul.
- Chan Tyrell: Who's Ashleigh? The rodeo queen you're dating?
- Gatsby Welles: She's not a cowgirl. She comes from one of the biggest banking families in Tucson. She was a debutante, actually. She came out.
- Chan Tyrell: She came out? Is she gay?