Hotel Artemis

Hotel Artemis is a film which doesn't do a great deal wrong. However, it is also a film which doesn't do a great deal right. It just kind of hangs in mid-air, with clichéd characters acting in clichéd ways and having clichéd conversations. And then it ends. It's not actually about anything. It's also predictable, with precious little substance. It looks pretty though.

In 2028, riots are tearing Los Angeles apart. The film takes place primarily in the eponymous Hotel Artemis, a secret hospital for criminals in the heart of the city. The motley crew of characters, many of whom are known only by the name of the room in which they're staying, include Waikiki (Sterling K. Brown) and his brother Honolulu (Brian Tyree Henry), bank robbers who have been involved in a shootout with police; Nice (Sofia Boutella), an assassin who "only kills important people", and just so happens to be Waikiki's ex-girlfriend; and Acapulco (a spectacularly miscast Charlie Day), a weapons dealer and all round weasel. Also present are The Wolf King (Jeff Goldblum), Los Angeles's most feared gangster, who also finances the hospital; his incompetent son, Crosby (an underutilised Zachary Quinto); and Morgan (Jenny Slate), a cop injured in the riots. The hospital is run by "Nurse" (Jodie Foster), an agoraphobic alcoholic haunted by visions of her past, with porter duties handled by Everest (Dave Bautista). The hospital functions because all guests must adhere to a rigid set of rules (the first of which is "don't kill the other patients") and a strict no weapons policy.

Sounds pretty interesting doesn't it? It's not. The dialogue is awful, the narrative beats can be seen coming a mile away, and the characters are all architypes, with only Nurse really fleshed out to any degree. There's the loud-mouth snivelling weapons dealer, the gorgeous but oh-so-deadly assassin, the criminal kingpin and his screw-up son who just wants to be like dad, the skilled bank robber who spends most of his time trying to get himself out of the trouble caused by his unreliable brother, and the tough-as-old-boots medical professional who just wants to help people when in actual fact, she's beyond help herself. The premise may be reasonably interesting, but, in his debut feature, writer/director Drew Pearce undermines it by populating the milieu with cardboard cut-outs instead of characters. True, most of the actors give it their all (Bautista in particular gives a performance far superior to the material with which he has to work), but there's just no substance here, no depth. There are simply too many clichés at every level to be able to overlook them.

Yes, it's an original(ish) idea made with a small(ish) budget, which is exactly what we need more of these days, when every second film is a CGI-infested remake, comic book adaptation, or sequel (or a CGI-infested remake of a sequel to a comic book adaptation). However, an original idea is all very well and good, but it can only take you so far; the execution has to be there as well, and this is where Hotel Artemis falls down. It's simply not an especially well-made film. Pearce does a reasonably good job with the directorial side of things, as aesthetically, the hotel is really intriguing, with a nice use of primary colours and a well-conceived juxtaposition of modern technology and 3D printers with retro décor and secret passages. In terms of plot, however, there's just nothing to latch onto or get your teeth into. None of the characters really do or say anything very interesting, and a half-hour into the film, as it became increasingly apparent that none of them were going to be developed to any great degree, I just stopped caring.

In a dark version of the future the streets are violent and the police corrupt. The hotel Artemis is a haven where wealthy people of a dubious nature can get themselves patched up.

The idea sounds great and the star of the show should be the hotel. I expected the hotel to be some kind of interesting ecosystem where the privileged and the scum of the underworld are forced to rub shoulders.

This happens to a small extent but the film concentrates more on the characters, which would be OK if the characters weren't so lame.

After twenty seconds of dialogue you know exactly what each character is about and you can predict if, when and how each one will die. **What you mean the sexy fem fatal isn't a helpless bimbo but is in fact a one woman army in stilettos! Well blow me down!**

Jodie Foster is (predictably) awesome and has the only character of any merit. Everyone else talks poo for a while, killing time until the inevitable fight at the end.

This is not a bad movie, it just sounded like it would be something different but is actually a hash of a cheesy, generic 80/90's Sci-fi flick that could easily have stared Van Damme.

The production is pretty good and there is some fun to be had here it is is just painfully predictable and feels tired.

Well if you ever need a room at the Hotel Artemis ... you are definitely not well. Pun very much intended. But watching the inhabitants of that establishment, is kind of fun. I might have thought there would be more to the film, it's a bit understating and it is also very low maintenance. But that doesn't have to be a bad thing at all.

Bautista may have a better and bigger role in Guardians (or maybe it's had, the future will show what will happen there), so it may also feel underwhelming what he is allowed to play with here. Even on Blade Runner 2049, where he had less screen time he seems to have had more impact. But different movies, different roles and all that. This is an ensemle thriller and it achieves what it sets out to do. Cool characters and good action/stunt sequences

It's 2028 L.A. Waikiki (Sterling K. Brown) leads a robbery gang during a city-wide revolt against privatized water. His brother is shot during the escape and he seeks refuge at Hotel Artemis. It is a secured private hospital for criminal members run by a hard-nosed nurse (Jodie Foster). Everest (Dave Bautista) is her giant muscle. She risks everything by saving policewoman Morgan (Jenny Slate). Other patients include loud-mouth arrogant Acapulco (Charlie Day) and assassin Nice (Sofia Boutella) on a secret mission. Waikiki discovers that his brother had stolen jewels from crime boss Wolf King (Jeff Goldblum) who shows up looking for treatment.

I really like the concept but there are issues with the execution. It's a movie of outrageous potential. With a few questionable logistics, my biggest problem is that I don't feel connected with Sterling K. Brown's character. Jodie Foster is doing her hardest. Despite some fun ideas, it doesn't really rise to its possibilities. It's not crazy enough. It's not compelling enough. It is good enough to be watchable.

So we have a dystopian, coming soon future L.A. where inhabitants riot to get clean H2O. Within it is a sanctuary of sorts where w/membership & following the rules you can reside in this sort of a hospital hotel secure from all that's going on in the streets. The nurse/doctor runs the place w/the help of a big muscle guy, and robotic medical help. They face all sorts of not-so-nice characters. A bit of violence of course to add spice to the intrigue. Script: A bit scattered at times, but somewhat creative. Acting: Interesting & different. Side note: There's a scene with a body beneath a pier that is almost identical to a similar scene in "Breath".