Lake on Fire

I never rate 1/10 a movie but there is this exception. I've waited one hour until something happens, telling myself "hold on, hold on, the final has gotta be huge if the film has 6.5/10", because so far i was just wondering what i was really watching. There is no horror in this film, no suspense, no nothing, just a waste of time. I don't think one can even call this a movie.

Now i'm a bit curious about what's going through the mind of people who voted 10/10. How would they note "the Schindler's list" then ?

Prior to sitting down to watch this 2016 movie titled "Lake On Fire" (aka "Conspiracy Theory"), I didn't know that it was a found footage movie. And had I known prior to sitting down, I wouldn't have given it the time of day, simply as I loathe the found footage genre.

But I had gotten down to watch it, and so I gave it a chance. And while I did manage to finish the movie, I can't claim to have been impressed or entertained. I simply stuck with it to the bitter end because this was based on aliens. However, I can in all honesty say that you shouldn't bother with this movie. Some of us suffered through it so you don't have to.

Being a found footage movie, you are in for some very questionable and shoddy camera work. I dislike this to the point where my interest in the movie dwindles away quickly. Why would I pay to sit through something that I could very well film better with my own DV camera and actually apply a stead hand to the camera while at it?

The dialogue in the movie was atrocious, and it was for the most part delivered by some very monotonous performances by the casted actors and actresses. So don't get your hopes up for a grand thespian performance here.

As for special effects. Well, they simply aren't present in the movie. None whatsoever. And the movie suffered from that fact, because it just felt like an amateurish home-movie.

My rating of "Lake On Fire" is a mere two out of ten stars. And this is by no account a movie that I will ever return to watch a second time.

Don't watch it, horrible movie. Anyone who like it or thought there was a important message within it, is idiotic. There is already tons of stuff about government cover ups to just being myths and we're alone. Also the gay guy is annoying and the girl who dry humps him looks like she needs some Vagisil.

This was even worse than Battlefield Earth, if you can imagine that.

First the positives: some good cinematography, hard to go wrong with the beautiful location and landscapes, lots of rich colour. And lots of Jennifer Mills. Riffing on "Ancient Aliens" gets a thumbs up and yes, they hit the mark for the patronising and faux dramatic tone. The overall impression was of a professional effort and aspects of the final third were promising.

Now the negatives: *way* too long to get into the sci fi/horror. *Way* too much conversation about fists, tits and asses, sigh. The character of Jamie was under-utilised when it seemed she might emerge as a leader - and what was the deal with the glowing sphere???

Overall quite disappointing.