Z/Rex: The Jurassic Dead

If you live in a state where marijuana is legal (and you're partaking), then you're going to love this movie. If you're a heavy drinker (and a happy drunk), you'll probably like it too.

If you're into tripping or just had your wisdom teeth pulled, if you're an eternal optimist, a North Korean physicist or a Gregorian Monk, you may also find it to be a rough in the diamond.

If your kid is an Honor Student, if you're into Settlers of Catan, Twister, MAGA, Bernie Sanders, Duke Nukem, country music, anime, Lambada, fake news, chem trails, Hummers, gun rights, hard salami, survivalism, canned beans, Beano, gluten-free meth, lactose-free beer pong, the welfare state or the vegan lifestyle ... any of those, a must see!

The only kind of people who wouldn't like this movie are 1) Reiki healers, 2) Black Mirror snobs and 3) communists (but not necessarily in that order).

Acting is sincere, charming and self-aware ... and ... THE DINO F/X ARE PRACTICAL instead of digital ... we talking full-on Toho style hallelujah Gojira-lovers rejoice!

Concept, direction, editing, sound and soundtrack all hit the bullseye ... despite the cockamamie script, which must've been written by a brain-fried dope-dabber in a room full of lava lamps and clouds of burning hemp incense. Regardless, HIGHLY ENTERTAINING with countless intended and unintended LOLs. Party time!

"The Jurassic Dead" story is uber-contrived, forcing a total submition of the audience to fancy and absurdities. It is a premise that is insanely over the top with everything thrown in but the kitchen sink. The concepts are, individually, cool - although not so original- however they are a bit much when thrown together.

The cast offer a mix bag of two diminsional caricatures, with a couple notable exceptions. Very little comes off as convincing with delivery. Most of the drama is melodramatic in the least flattering way- again with a few notable exceptions.

As for the special effects, personally I found just as much that worked for "The Jurassic Dead" as I found wrong. First, kudos to FX department for doing practical creature efeects. It was a nice design, it worked on camera with one obvious exception, the T-Rex was too small. The CGI was at times, spot-on, some scenes came off a bit 1990, but all in all, Syfy and The Asylum worthy material.

Overall, "The Jurassic Dead" is a great film, the acting and premise is slightly rough to sit through, but there are a few cool, entertaining moments. The big winner for this one is the musical score, and sound track. Awesome work. If you are a fan of these types of microbudget creature features then it will be a decent watch, if not just go into "The Jurassic Dead" for warned.

Right...

Well, I knew beforehand already that when I sat down to watch a movie such as "Z/Rex: The Jurassic Dead", then I would be in for a questionable affair. But still, I decided to watch it for two reasons. The first and foremost important factor is that this was a pseudo-zombie movie after all, and anything zombiesque and I am there. Secondly, there was a chance, however slim, that it might actually turn out to be so campy that it would be enjoyable.

Turns out, it wasn't...

Do yourself a favor and stay well clear of the 2017 movie titled "Z/Rex: The Jurassic Dead", because it is abysmal. Yeah, abysmal, that is the best word to summarize this movie with a single word.

There was so much green screen used, and it wasn't even properly made, because it looked so god awful and so fake that it was laughable. And even a blind person would stop, turn his head and go 'oh no they didn't!'. It was that bad.

As for the acting, well let's just be blunt and say that this isn't going to harvest any kind of awards. For the most parts, then acting was still a work in progress I suppose. Mia Paris (or Mia Klosterman) was actually the only one whom put on a memorable performance throughout this entire movie. And she could do nothing to salvage this wreck. And how Andy Haman got cast for this movie was simply beyond my comprehension.

The characters in the movie were just about as deep and interesting as soggy cardboard, and they had the dialogue to match that as well. So it was sort of semi-hilarious to watch the actors and actresses stumble through this horrible script and deliver atrocious dialogue.

The CGI and special effects were ludicrous. Everything was just so bad to witness and it makes you cringe from time to time.

"Z/Rex: The Jurassic Dead" is by no means worth the time, money or effort. Some of us suffered through the entire movie so you don't have to.

After a series of personal setbacks, a scientist who prophesized that a series of impending accidents to wipe out humanity sees them come true forcing a Black Ops unit and travelers into banding together at an abandoned silo that houses a rampaging dinosaur attacking and eating everyone.

This here wasn't that bad of an effort. One of the more enjoyable aspects here is the dinosaur action, when it occurs, ends up being rather fun throughout here. The opening release of the creature at the sale has some rather fun moments once he brings the creature to life as the gunfire to stop it offers some solid action to open this up, the bunker scenes are a lot of fun and the rampaging creature in the final half alongside the zombies offer up some nice action-packed fun. Those bunker sequences, from a soldier bare-knuckle boxing it to the creature lurching out of the darkness to mangle the intended victims or the different brawls with the zombies coming back to attack manage to offer up even more thrilling kinds of action here during the main part of the film that really needs it. As well, there's also the other big plus of the film is the cheesy enough special effects which is to be quite commended throughout here. Rather than dwell on bargain-basement style CGI that really should've been employed here, this decides to go for a largely inanimate model that at least manages to interact with the cast and gives the impression of something being there physically in the shot with people that normally doesn't emerge in these kinds of films. The creature looks decent enough and far better than expected which is the main point here, and it has to be commended on that front. As well as the rather impressive scope of the story which is quite large for this type of film, there's a few solid points here which hold it up over the few minor flaws to be had. Among the main flaws here is the act that this one just has too many plot points for what should be a rather simple and straightforward storyline. The idea of the serum getting unleashed and bringing about the dinosaurs' rampage should've been the main point of this one, but putting together the backstory at the college, the various interjections with the Black Ops team traveling through the desert and the exploits of the power-plant sealed away in the distance all don't have too much purpose being here in the film. Not only do they complicate matters way too much when it doesn't need to, but there's also the facet of keeping the dinosaur off-screen far longer than it really should for this type of movie. Despite staying interesting for the most part, a movie of this length really doesn't need to have too many subplots keeping it's star attraction off-screen with these issues the way the film does. The only other problem to be had here is the rather obvious lack of budget to be had in the film. Not only is the film basically drenched in a rather irritated computerized glow that makes it look post-apocalyptic when it doesn't really do anything for the film, but the one-location set used here stands out for just redressing the same setting as the various rooms in the bunker. The main dinosaur itself is obviously a puppet on a rotor that's manoeuvred around in a herking manner that gives away the low-budget nature of the whole film, which is then brought home by the eighty minute running time of this one. These here are what manage to hold this down overall.

Rated Unrated/R: Graphic Violence, Graphic Language and mild drug use.

HEY EVERYBODY ITS ME (4), and today we review .... return of the living t rex ....the movie !!!!!

SO here we have a movie ....that ALMOST looks like a VR experience cut scene in one of those old fun park attractions .... you know ? ...no you dont ? .. WELL take my word for it , it was a thing !!!!!!! So much green screen used here that i would bet cash the editors eyes are still trying ot recover LOL .... trust me bro ..i know the feels .........

this thing was terrible ......and i know terrible, trust me , ive watched my own films .......BUT it was crazy in a good way, a fun way ...IF only they had used a REAL location instead of the green screen it would have been 10000000000 times better HOWEVER they used the greenscreening to hide SO much that they would have HAD to hide anyways and probably could not have otherwise ..... so ... in this case who knows it might have been the best call .. PLUS who can just find an old science type bunker you can film in laying around ??? But with the green screening issues , like some of the backgrounds didnt sit still, or the actors when moving they didnt exactly match up to the physics of the ground or walls ....or anything lol.... with all that .... they still persevered .....still marched on and made this thing happen ... and i say ...good job .... because .... you did a thing !!!!

And they DID do a fantastic job of hiding the human actors legs in the dino suite throughout the film ... also hiding them just out of frame OR behind a barrel or someone etc ...so points for getting creative on slight of hand ....in fact 75 % of this film was honestly slight of hand ....... just a lot of "as long as people dont notice" it looks FINE ........

pros ... i man ... dinosaurs, zombies , beefy guys talking trash, explosions ....just missing tons of boobs and i would have swore i was back in the 80's !!!!!! And due to the greenscreening the over all film had its own kind of aesthetic to it .... and it was "neat" i guess ....

cons .... bout everything else .... acting was rough, the jokes were rough, the references , i enjoyed a bit but maybe a little over played .... OR maybe they should have just stuck to the duke nukem ones .. ongoing ? ..i dont know .. but the puns / jokes were kind of .."stale" ? ... and the editing left me asking myself .... did i do a bag a shrooms laced with meth wrapped in taco sauce before i started this ? .... because WHAT !?!?!??!?? It was like ...someone stuck it in a blender and pushed the "lets hope for the best" button .... thats a button on blenders right ? ... BECAUSE IT SURE MUST HAVE BEEN FOR THIS ONE !!!!!!!!! It just clips along at points lighting fast where "something" happens ... dont know what but now 2 dudes are not with the group ..how ??? Well one guy says he tied his shoes ......so what about the other guy ..howd he get lost ? .... so ...yea ... like ... what ? .... im pretty sure stevie wonder edited this one .......

over all the only question i ever ask is "was it entertaining " the answer is ..... MAYBE ? ..... i suppose it IS ...IF you are into 1.5 hour long music videos from industrial bands .....just put this on and play your favorite eisbrecher song .... or ohgr or something .......BUT even without that .....its oddly entertaining for the oddball visual-ness ? ... and terrible-ness ? ... dang .. it does give you a little something .. BUT is it enough ? ... this time i just dont know .......

3/10.