shiningmonk

Dumb Norwegian medical students decide to spend a few days in chalet on snow-ridden mountain, with no mobile phone signal and an outdoor toilet. For no apparent reason, Nazi zombies appear but fortunately, they're pretty crap and mostly get knocked down by a couple of good punches. Furthermore, unlike American zombies, these Undead SS soldiers don't bite or eat people's flesh. They're party trick is to surround you and then pull you apart with a couple of tugs. Maybe US kids are made of sterner stuff than their Norwegian counterparts.

Granted there are a couple of funny scenes (including a very witty ending), but not enough to salvage what is essentially a very low-budget boring film.

For those who find Hagar the Horrible exciting or who have never seen a zombie film before, go ahead and rent this, you'll enjoy it. However, fans of the zombie genre will find the special effects poor and the zombies very lame.

Stargate SG1 and Stargate Atlantis were excellent shows, with great music, interesting plots, exciting action scenes and characters you could really like.

Stargate Universe is just the opposite. It's more like a reality TV show than a sci fi drama, focussing on the reactions of boring characters to various boring events (e.g. feeling cold, losing a parent, finding out your boyfriend's cheating on you when you've been cheating on him anyway). Each episode consists of about 5 minutes of plot and 45 minutes of people having sex, having a shower, having an argument or dancing at a disco.

It's about a bunch of people with no redeeming qualities who argue a lot and just happen to be lost on a spaceship.

Give it a miss.

I stumbled upon this fantasy film by accident and didn't really expect much from it, even though it stars the Mummy legend, Arnold Vosloo, who made an excellent Darkman 2. I was pleasantly surprised.

The premise, about Greek hero Odysseus encountering vampires on a lost island, sounds absurd. The special effects budget was clearly small and there are some scenes when you have to imagine what the heroes are fighting since the camera doesn't show it. However, the whole thing is saved by two factors. Firstly, the writers knew what they were doing. They were obviously familiar with Homer's classic epic, with the protagonist's strengths and weaknesses, and with how people talked and behaved in those mythological times. This helps makes the whole thing plausible. They also didn't waste time on unnecessary plot detours. Further, the story is actually well-crafted and every scene is actually relevant.

Secondly, the cast perform very well. Vosloo, as ever, is charismatic, and delivers his dialogue excellently. Randal Edwards makes a believable Homer and JR Bourne is a courageous Perimedes. All this without any irritating side kicks or distracting contemporary styles of speech.

If you're expecting a modern-day horror film, you'll be disappointed. But if you watch this with some cynicism, if you're familiar with Homer's Odyssey and enjoy a different slant on the vampire myth, this is a perfect Saturday afternoon movie, which may leave you with some interesting thoughts.