Saayer

If it was a horror comedy, great effort. On some scenes, we all burst out laughing.

If wasn't a comedy and just horror... A pity.

A non existent story in which you have to make out things on your own because no logic will prevail.

If this movie was 40 minutes long and available on YouTube for free, it would still not be worth watching. Let alone paying 1000 rupees per person and sitting in the theater for two hours.

The male child artist visible laughs in some scenes and it made to the final cut. All the female characters have Botox filled faces finding it really hard to emote. The female lead's weight kept fluctuating throughout the film. Placement of a lot of scenes was unnecessary and made no sense.

Pro tip: never make jinns in CGI. Even Hollywood doesn't do it because it is very difficult to scare people with it. Use prosthetics or don't show but don't show cartoonish funny CGI.

The only thing I'm scared of after watching the film is the state of Pakistani cinema.

If there is one thing I have learned over the last one decade, its not to have any expectations from an SRK film. Barring Chak De India, he has hardly had anything noteworthy in the last ten years that could re-establish his diminishing credentials as a great actor, notwithstanding, his ever growing super stardom. Even though he had strong performances in My Name Is Khan and partly Jab Tak Hai Jaan, he was unable to save those sinking ships due to lack of story.

Despite all that, FAN called for expectations of a better film. A great SRK film where he could re-live the Chak De magic. For starters, the premise was unique, even though inspired from the Robert DeNiro's Fan. At least SRK was not going to be romancing sari clad girls singing in unrelatable exotic locations. If anything, it was a song-less film. Mere association of Varun Grover with the film made it more intriguing. If you don't know who Varun Grover is, you may stop reading further. The guy is a genius. Maneesh Sharma and Habib Faisal made a formidable team in Band Baaja Baraat and under delivered in the follow-ups. Fan was going to be their chance a redemption with everything going their way.

Except, it didn't.

There is nothing visibly wrong with Fan as such. Its not a Tees Maar Khan where you just want to leave the theater half an hour into the film. Its actually the lost opportunity that makes you cringe. A simple "what it could have been" had it been treated better. What if the makers of the film stayed true to the essence of the film instead of going preachy and instead of glorifying SRK more and more? What if they had worked harder on developing the real conflict of the story instead of focusing on four silly chases. What if they had made pulling it off more difficult for the poor hapless Fan instead of the super famous and resourceful star.

I am all for creative liberty and taking leap of faith, however, despite all my generosity, I struggle to believe when a film star allows a fan to enter his van alone with him so that he can beat him up. I refuse to accept a super star running after his fan on the streets chasing him while no personal body guard or cops step up to take the responsibility. And even if I accept the poor fan's reach to places like London and Dubrovnik in one week, I won't able to accept his access to untraceable phones, reaching high security areas without any problem and escaping the police every time. Never mind the climax fist fight between the two resulting in a long sanctimonious speech by the star.

Its still not a disaster though. There are several enjoyable sequences in the 140 minutes long film. The hesitant romance between Gaurav and his Delhi girlfriend is full of warmth and should have been exposed a little more. Gaurav's parents' chemistry with their son is good. The jibes at SRK's lifestyle coming from his staff and other people make you smile. SRK knows how not to take himself too seriously unlike another big Khan of the industry. Production design by Maneesh Sharma's usual suspect Abid T.P, costumes by the newbie Niharika Bhasin and make-up are highlights of the film. Academy Award winner Greg Cannon and his team did a great job of creating Gaurav, the Fan.

Fan is an SRK film and only an SRK film. Other than SRK there is hardly any other prominent actor in the film. He shoulders the responsibility of lifting the film alone. His effort is strong and worthy but he is let down by scantily executed script where Habib Faisal was unable to do justice to an intriguing premise. Despite the limitations of the story, SRK has done well. His portrayal of Gaurav has the energy and passion of a 20-year-old while Aryan has the maturity and composure of an aging actor. He does go overboard in a few scenes, specially the ones with his staff and cops, but overall manages to show great restraint. There is, however, a conscious effort to portray a certain image of Aryan Khanna, which is how SRK wants the world to know him. This film has a purpose to serve as a PR machinery for SRK. To show people his struggle, his family-man image and his constant struggle with his own stardom.

Had all the 'what if' questions been taken care of, Fan could have gone as one of the best performances of SRK's career and possibly the best film of the year. As it stands now, Fan is an interesting film with several disappointing moments.

I have to admit, I went to watch Bajrangi Bhaijan (BB) with a lot of prejudice. I am not a big fan of Kabir Khan, have not liked Kareena Kapoor other than Jab We Met. I am not a Salman Fan either nd despite that I watch all his Eid releases on first day.

I had four hypotheses before going to the theater and I had made an outline of the review I was going to write. Generally it's a set template for a Kabir Khan Salman Khan film. Nonetheless, my predetermined conclusion of BB being a mediocre film was proved wrong.

1. Kareena Kapoor will be unnecessary in the film – Proved True. Not just Kareena, the entire subplot of Salman's love interest was completely unnecessary. In the first half, a good twenty minutes were spent on establishing the love story between Salman and Kareena. As the film lasted 163 minutes, cutting fifteen of those minutes and a song could have made the edit sharper and more gripping. The role could have been played by any actress. Salman could have been a married or single man in the film. It would not have had any impact on the final outcome.

2. Nawazuddin Siddiui will be brilliant – Proved True. And boy he was fantastic. His intro sequence is a straight lift from Pakistan's very own Chaand Nawab and as it turns out, his character is actually called Chaand Nawab. Nawaz comes on screen only in the second half of BB and took the burden of carrying the film on his gifted shoulders. His chemistry with Salman is something seen very rarely between male leads of a film. Immaculate comic timing, perfect body language and expressive eyes. I am not gonna say more but if someone is selling T-shirts saying "I heart Nawazudding Siddiqui", let me know.

3. Salman Khan will not be able to emote as per the requirements of the role – 50/50. Salman as an actor has limitations, we all know that. Have those precincts ever made any difference? No. Salman is not a method actor. He will never be Naseer or Aamir. I watch Salman Khan films to see whether he is better than his other films or not. In BB, the actor has put in a genuine effort to emote and get into the skin of the role. This is one of the best performances of bhai's career, if not the best. His demeanor as a simple villager is to the point, his performance towards the latter half of the film is strong. He has a very powerful scene in the first half at a brothel, where he struggled to convince on the emotions, but still did better than his other films. BB has no over the top action, or dances, or shirtless sequences or romantic songs. It is heavily dependent on the lead actor. Funnily, despite all the limitations Salman Khan has, I was unable to picture any other actor playing Bajrangi. BB did not need an actor. BB needed Salman Khan the star to deliver and he has delivered.

The good thing is that Salman is not the only super star in the film. The other one is Harshaali Malhotra, the child actor playing Shahida. Super cute, super charming and super convincing. It was a challenging role with no dialogs and the kid really showed her competence despite presence of some big names in the film. Darsheel Safari level stuff.

Kabir Khan is just a glorified, slightly more intelligent Farah Khan – Proved Wrong. This is where I was completely wrong. The problem I have had with other KK films is that they were on a pretense of being intelligent and logical social dramas, which in reality they were not be it New York or Ek Tha Tiger. They were more intelligent than Farah Khan, Prabhudeva and Rohit Shetty films, hence made the masses (read Salman Khan fans) feel that they are watching intellectual cinema. This strategy resulted in big commercial success for KK. That still does not mean that those films were good films.

BB is different. KK has been vigilant about sense and aesthetics more than just looking into a mass appeal. This could be a new beginning for a successful director to becoming a good director. He has been helped a great deal by Vijayendra Prasad's story and a capable production design team of Rajnish Hedao. Vijayendra' a household name in South market, has brought an original story with a lot of room to attract cine- goers. Rajnish's team, well known for PK, Rockstar and Three Idiots, already has vast experience of multi- location shoots. BB spreads across various cities and weathers and production design and art direction is always tough for such films. Credit to KK for utilizing the resources at hand in the best possible way.

Lastly, he has done remarkably well in treatment of the screenplay. He knew when to take creative liberty in best interest of the film (Armies of both countries being lenient on borders etc.) and knew when to make things look realistic (tunnels at the border, Samjhota express, Shahid Afridi etc.). He could have done better with the duration of the climax though by eliminating some unnecessary emotional manipulations.

BB is not an Anti-Pakistan film. The filmmakers have tried being reasonable as much as they could without ruining the story requirements. They have shown good and bad on both the sides. The film also touched upon religious divide and there it has shown Muslims as the more accommodating of the two religions. What it does communicate strongly is the secular message of modern India.

It's a possibility that it will be a lesser commercial success than Kick or Ek Tha Tiger. BB is not a typical Salman Khan film. BB is not a typical Kabir Khan film. BB is a good film.