KB-21

Maybe my expectations were too high -- but then again, all I wanted was a few laughs from a movie promising to be a send-up of all those Fatal Attraction-type thrillers. Claudia Christian and Arye Gross weren't bad, but the dialogue they were handed was just doltish, and the supporting cast was about as funny as a hearse -- what was with that ridiculous police sergeant? I just got the sense that everyone involved was either trying way too hard to make a lousy script funny, or (in the case of Norman Fell and the rest of the supporting cast) just marking time and waiting for their paychecks. 90 minutes, maybe half a dozen laughs. A waste of a great premise.

Why is this movie not up there with 'The Breakfast Club,' 'Heathers,' and other teen rite-of-passage classics? 'Three O'Clock High' is hilarious. The cinematography is as well-executed as the script, and laughs appear at just about every turn. The mixed nuts in the cast give great deadpan performances (Jeffrey Tambor kills me every time as he heartbrokenly surveys the vandalized school supply store -- 'what kind of animals would DO this?' he almost weeps), playing up the comic absurdity of the script. A wonderful farce that hasn't lost a bit of its charm in 12 years. Why Anne Ryan, the hero's girlfriend, disappeared after this movie is a mystery to me -- she should have become another Winona Ryder. Don't pass this one up if your local video store has bothered to keep it on the shelf. You can thank me later. And if you're leery because the movie tanked at the box office, remember, Milli Vanilli's record sold seven million copies, so trusting the mainstream public is not always the best idea...

Whoo-ee! That sound you hear is the careers of C. Thomas Howell and Matt Frewer burning up on re-entry just before they smack into the ground. I hate to be a jerk, because I loved Frewer in Max Headroom, but this movie was a pile of cack. Even as a fan of cornball b-grade sci-fi flicks, I was appalled (when I was awake). Nonsensical plot twists, vein-popping overacting, and a convoluted script all add up to a big stinking plate full of 'who cares?' all around. This one's not even worth renting on cheap night -- pick up 'Cube' instead, or you may be permanently soured on all things celluloidal and Canadian.