Little Red Riding Hood

I think the movie makers of this train wreck need to go watch red riding hood for real, or read the book. It has zero to do with anything closely even resembling red riding hood.

What happened to the modern day girl?

I think the credits were rolled to just end this disaster.

Hilarious at times.

What can I say about this "movie"? Rarely have I experienced a film that failed so completely - and completely on all levels. The "actors" make everything, but certainly not acting. The cheap special effects can be made better by nearly every ten-year-old with a computer. The make-up makes the figures into immovable pseudo-beings. Camera, cut - everything is on the same lowest level. Visual effects are used for they own, not to serve the film or even the story. Especially since the allegedly based on Brothers Grimm, the term "story" is not deserved. This crude "story" never reveals itself. Part of the disaster is a synthetic retort sounds, which are supposed to promise something, even if it never becomes clear what exactly.

Author-director-cameraman-cutter Rene Perez, producer Robert Amstler and composer Risto R Muzik have to hate their audience and filmmaking. I've seen a lot of bad movies, but that's really one of the worst things I've ever seen. And not because it's just trashy. But because this film is "evil", bad, dumb, silly, a real catastrophe through and through. Not one area, not a single one, knows to convince.

This film professes to be the Grimm Fairy Tales version of Little Red Riding Hood but doesn't even follow that basic plot. It really seems to be two different bottom of the barrel TV movies stitched together with no rhyme or reason. The plot seems to be that a medieval Little Red Riding Hood is going through the forest when an undead knight warns her of evil. A little later someone in werewolf makeup chases after her, so she runs away... to the castle of said evil, of course. She goes right in and then from then on does nothing of any interest. We never even see the big bad wolf again. That's the first 15 minutes. The ultimate bad guy stands around a lot in meaningless poses we assume the director either thought was dramatic or to excessively pad out the running length of the film. Oh, and everyone does a lot of slow walking that the camera documents in great detail. Anyway, then we cut to modern days (with no explanation) with an influencer (played by Nicole Stark, who is about the closest thing to a redeeming value this film has) in the wild somewhere on a photography trip deep in the mountains before college starts up. The nature is shot through a filter that sucks all the color and grandeur out of it, so even that appears lifeless and nearly monochrome. Then her car (Wait, car? She said she was deep in the wild?) is destroyed by a... I don't know, mummy lady with explosive glass balls? It's never explained what she's supposed to be. So the woman finds a chateau or something, which happens to be... the summer home of the same ultimate evil? I can't even explain who or what this guy's supposed to be, just a guy in a latex mask who apes doing Shakespeare and sometimes has SFX smoke come out of his body. And there's a lot of shots in this film of one bad guy or another in latex mask creeping around comically behind a female character while she's unaware, as if that's threatening, but then walking away for no reason. And, seriously, a whole lot of time transpires, and absolutely nothing of any consequence happens. At some point there seems to be something supposedly happening, but it doesn't advance the plot in any way. And then, back in the middle ages, some other hero shows up and meets a beautiful woman, and, what? Nothing. Then he meets Little Red at the castle of ultimate doom, and the movie just ends shortly later. I'm not marking this as a spoiler because there's absolutely nothing to spoil. I can't reveal a plot point if it doesn't have one. I've reviewed some of this director's movies before, and they were, unsurprisingly, atrocious, but this film is even worse than they were somehow. If you have seen some of my other reviews, you can see I usually bend over backwards to give out stars. Usually if something has some good parts, but admittedly not many, it'll still get a 4. If it's just bad across the board, I'll throw out a 2 just for the effort of making a movie. This gets a one. Not even sorry for that at all. If only I could give it zero.

I could attempt to write a long winded review. However, in theses busy times I will keep this review succinct. You know when your driving along and you see animal that's been hit by a Mack Truck. You can't help but look at it muttering under your breath "what on earth was that". Well, that pretty much sums up this movie. The Costumes are horrendous the special effects look like they came from a store room that's been locked up since 1985. Actually, this movie is so bad its almost ingenious. The story line is convoluted and makes no real sense. This is sure to become a cult classic someday, somewhere. This, parents is the dangers when you give your kids a digicam and adobe after effects.

-Little Red Riding Hood (2015) "movie" review: -So not-really-Little Red Riding Hoodish is evidently another adaptation of, wait, you'll never guess! Little Red Riding Hood. Only this one looks like is has the quality of a student project. A high school student project. No, I was in a high school film project, and it was better than this. I am NOT exaggerating.

-I am going to go ahead and point out how much fun I had hating this film! Again, no joke.

-The "film" didn't really have a story. It was also part modern, I guess, but never explained anything. It did not follow the story, things just happened because they happened, and you never really know what is happening. And then suddenly, 50 million shots of weird mud-ish people in a castle! The editing was one of the worst things about this ever. Actually it was the worst editing I have ever seen. Yup.

-The pace was sooooooo slow because NOTHING HAPPENED!!!! EVER. The shots of the mud-ish people were just walking around. NOTHING HAPPENS!!!! -The acting makes Disney Channel look like the Oscars. Including people who can't read lines, people who can't run, people who can't emote, wolf masks, mud people walking, a 'modern person' who makes Megan Fox's acting look sharp, and lots. And lots. AND LOTS. Of really really horrible voice-overs. Literally worse than The Room.

-The characters. There is not enough sustenance in this "movie" to even look at any sort of character development.

-The music is tediously bad and the same two pieces over-and-over again! -The effects are laughable. At least the two stupid Vs. movies I reviewed had effects to show off, this one had really bad prosthetics and masks.

-Hey, at least the poster looked cool! Doesn't matter. Not in the film.

-Also I did not pay attention to the rating or content. I apologize. I think its fine, but I don't remember. I was too busy facepalming.

-In conclusion, I laughed my way through how bad Little Red Riding Hood was. Therefore: Little Red Riding Hood is…. So bad, it's good! In fact it is probably one of the worst films I have even seen. I'm not joking.

-So did you see Not-so-little Red Riding Hood-ish walks around? You should! It's a blast!