- Mal: [after Jay sets off the alarm at the museum] What to go, Jay! Now we have to go to school tomorrow!
- [as the villain kids arrive in Auradon, a huge welcome wagon has been laid out for them. The limo pulls up, and Jay and Carlos roll out, fighting over a comforter]
- Carlos: You got everything else! Why do you want this?
- Jay: Cuz' you want it!
- Mal: [Mal notices the crowd] Guys, we have an audience.
- [the boys straighten up]
- [In Remedial Goodness 101]
- Fairy Godmother: If someone gives you a crying baby, do you a: curse it, b: lock it in a tower, c: give it a bottle, or d: carve out its heart?
- [Evie raises her hand]
- Fairy Godmother: Yes, Evie.
- Evie: What was the second one again?
- Fairy Godmother: [smiles, tries not to look disappointed] Oh, okay. Anybody else?
- [Fairy Godmother comes out to greet the kids and sees Jay's hands full of loot]
- Jay: [trying to save face] Just cleaning up.
- Fairy Godmother: [sweetly] Leave it like you found it.
- [beat]
- Fairy Godmother: [more serious] And by that, I mean just leave it.
- Queen Leah: My daughter was raised by fairies because of your mother's curse. Her first words... her first steps... I missed it all!
- Evil Queen: Who's the fairest of them all?
- Evie: [enthusiastically] Me!
- Evil Queen: [shocked] What?
- Evie: [apologetically] I mean you!
- [the villains watch Ben's coronation on TV. Snow White covers the coronation]
- Evil Queen: [mocking] I'm Snow White, the fairest of them all.
- [scoffs]
- Evil Queen: Please, she's definitely had work done.
- Jafar: [the Villain Kids are leaving the isle] Bring back the gold!
- Evil Queen: Bring back a prince!
- Cruella de Vil: Bring back a puppy!
- Snow White: [covering the coronation] At last, here we are, broadcasting live from the coronation where Prince Benjamin will soon be crowned king! I'm Snow White, bringing you up to the second coverage of Who's The Fairest Of Them All.