Sharktopus vs. Whalewolf

No seriously? What do you expect from a movie with a title like that? Now I have not seen the previous entry into the Sharktopus ... universe I guess you can call it (there are apparantly another two of them prior to this one), so I can't say how this does compared to them.

What I can say, is that the CGI is as bad as one can imagine. Very obvious. So obvious though that the movie is winking almost all the way through it. Like when one character very late in the movie says upon seeing one of the creature eating another person, something along the lines of "that doesn't even look real". Yes the movie is aware of its flaws, the characters are too. Playing catch with a Whalewolf (great name btw)? I mean come on ... also the slapstick of the creature slapping Casper van Dien around? Or showing him on a map where he is, after he asks and wonders exactly that? That doesn't mean that all jokes work. Far from it. Some are just plain bad ... and almost hurt physically. But again, what to expect? Exactly! (although nudity would be something I reckon many did expect ... well you won't get that)

Sharktopus vs. Whalewolf (2015)

** (out of 4)

The drunken boat captain Ray (Casper Van Dien) is thrown into jail after a woman on his boat is killed by the sharktopus. While this is going on, mad scientist Dr. Reinhardt (Catherine Oxenberg) is experimenting with DNA, which leads to the whalewolf character. Soon more dead bodies are piling up while the two large monsters battle one another.

This is the third film in the SHARKTOPUS series and it's certainly the best. I think what makes this one work is that the film gives a lot of effort in trying to be funny and campy. The first two films in the series as well as many of these SyFy movies seem to think that if you purposely make a movie bad then it's going to be entertaining. That's not the case and that's why so many of them fail. This one here is obviously silly and over- the-top but the film doesn't play it dumb and instead comes up with a few clever jokes that actually work.

The highlight of the film is certainly the Oxenberg character as the actress is clearly having a blast playing the mad German scientist. Even funnier is a sequence where her big-breasted assistant runs around in slow motion with her things juggling. This here is pure Roger Corman sexism at its finest. Van Dien is good enough in his role and there's no doubt that he too appears to be having fun. Akari Endo is also good in her supporting role. As you'd expect, there's quite a bit of fake looking blood as various body parts are eaten by the two main characters.

SHARKTOPUS VS. WHALEWOLF is pretty good in its own way so if you're a fan of these types of movies then you're bound to get a few laughs out of it.

A funeral party gets eaten by Sharktopus. Drunken captain Ray Brady (Casper Van Dien) gets taken to jail. Dr. Elsa Reinhardt (Catherine Oxenberg) continues her anti-aging experiments. She mixes the genes of a killer whale and a wolf. The resulting Whalewolf starts causing chaos.

Who the hell dumps a whole coffin into the sea? Nobody. I get the attempt to camp it up. Instead of a coffin, they could wrap up a body and place a funny flag on top. Oxenberg with booby nurse is definitely going full camp and I appreciate that. I don't think Casper Van Dien is good although he tries after the voodoo. I am not sure about the voodoo. It has a bit of camp element, but not camp enough. It gets uncomfortable at times. This franchise needs to go full camp, but they don't always get there.

I messed up again and watched the 3rd movie in a series first. It probably doesn't matter except that I have nothing to compare it to. This is by far the best bad shark movie I have seen so far. The story was good and it was actually funny. The only thing I didn't like was that people immediately recognized it as a whalewolf. If I didn't know the name of the movie I would never have been able to guess at what it was. It has a shark fin, lol. I might have called it sharkdog. Watch it.

For some odd reason I keep returning to movies like this, even though you know already that it is 99% likely going to be another stinker. And this whole genre is just loaded with questionable additions that outdo each other in one way or another.

But still, every now and then there are some of these movies that turn out to be entertaining and funny to watch. "Sharktopus vs Whalewolf", however, just wasn't one of those movies.

With movies such as "Sharktopus vs Whalewolf" you already know that you will most likely be in for some questionable CGI and special effects. But "Sharktopus vs Whalewolf" was not even trying. The CGI effects in this movie were among the top of most laughable and poor CGI effects that I have seen in this genre of movies.

The story in "Sharktopus vs Whalewolf" was also among some of the more outrageous and laughable of story lines, even for this particularly unique genre of movies. Why? Well, because it seemed like the writers weren't even trying to be serious.

"Sharktopus vs Whalewolf" is also filled with lame attempts at incorporating comedy in the movie; attempts which really failed at every aspect. And the movie suffered from that.

Catherine Oxenberg has the worst fake German accent ever and puts on one of the worst acting performances in the history of low budget creature features. But that might actually be one of the selling points to the movie, and why you should check it out. Trust me, it is worth watching, because it is bad on an epic scale.

Oh, and there was one scene where I counted 31 shots being fired from a handgun. That was just impressive. So at least there was something impressive to be seen in "Sharktopus vs Whalewolf".