American Beach House

.....one giant stinker of a movie that has absolutely nothing to redeem it other than the beautiful ladies.

American Pie this is not - also way too late to ride that wave, no? Well maybe you feel differently. Now I am not blaming the actors too much here. They give it their best shot - at least it feels like it. But take the outtakes during and all the way through to the end of the credits ... they seem nice and all ... until you realize (especially the last clip) ... it is quite weird and aggressive. What I mean by that in terms of the movie: the tone is all over the place.

The movie itself is not overly aggressive .. it is not to my liking (especially the whole peeping and then revenge plots/schemes) ... but hey, maybe you are into that low brow humor (well if you can call it that).

For better or worse (you decide), there is quite a lot of nudity in this. And there is even one sexual encounter that ... well it has a slight comical angle still plays for ... well I'll say excitement. The horny old ladies ... I don't know ... same goes for the ... "viagra" joke ... let's say they go hand in hand .... you'll get it if you decide to watch. Also Mischa has fallen ... I reckon she is not getting any other roles and she has to accept what she is being offered ... I am not mad at her or telling her off _ it's just a shame.

It has some sexy ladies in it. But so does an adult movie, and they have better story lines than this thing.

An IMDb review needs to have 10 lines. But there's not that much to say about this movie. It's supposed to be a comedy. But it's less funny than a funeral.

Don't spend your time on this movie. Just stare at your wall for an hour and a half. It will be equally boring, but you won't feel so annoyed after it.

I'm halfway through the movie now. Time to switch it off. If anyone's looking for me, I will be staring at my wall...

Let's be honest, the most interest this movie generates is from curiosity, either by how they drag Lorenzo Lamas or how much attractive girls in poster will shed their clothes. That is much more attention than this movie deserves, as it has no appeal whatsoever aside from few superficial flashes of half-naked ladies, even that is debatable as merit.

It's like a parody of reality show, and would have been funny if it didn't try to shoehorn cringe worthy romcom script. Nothing more than a few people prancing in beach, the drama is barren at best and the comedy is so outdated, it wouldn't have worked even in 80s.

All characters don't look authentic, and Lorenzo Lamas pops up every now and then to offer vague advice and grope random girls. There are even awkward soundtracks to accompany the whole lackluster parade.

A few good looking people in bikini can't sugarcoat how bad this movie is. Highly recommended to avoid.

Mischa Barton's Film career I'm guessing ended on this low budget tasteless rotten egg.

The story was a corny version of American Pie. There is nothing unique here it's only been done About 10,000 times by every amateur hour film school student for fun.

Cute girls and an attempt to bring Hollywood in with a decent performance from a typical lying agent summarize the highlights of this film.

It was Hard to watch. It looked like it was shot on an iPhone 4. The Cinematography and color was soft and had a dull yellow tint out doors. I give it a D