Roy

Fifty minutes in to the movie I started to ask the question 'What is going on here? Where is the movie I was promised by the trailer?' Nearly all the scenes that were in the trailer have been played out by now. You could stare at Jacqueline or Ranbir or Arjun and you could sing along with the chart buster songs. That's it, that's all you can do in the theater after the first 20 minutes or so. If you've seen the trailer, you've seen more than what the movie has to offer.

Somewhere in the 'intellectual' dialogs and sleek, stylish cinematography lies buried the dreams of an amateur director with a lot of potential. Vikramjit Singh will need a lot more nurturing before he can make a coherent movie. I have nothing to spoil the plot, that is how bad the movie is. I would give this 0 out of 10 just because the promise was not delivered upon.

I have been fortunate enough to know people who have made 15 minute short films with more sense and better vision. None of the actors are at fault although one would not have expected Ranbir Kapoor to be part of such a movie. Maybe even he was fooled by the seemingly engrossing premise like the rest of us.

I had many expectations from this film, 'Roy'. But it proved to be an extremely senseless, illogical, third class, and a boring film.

There is lack of comedy, suspense, thrill and a proper script & story which was expected to take a good grip. The entire film is filled with useless and non-sense dialogues. All audience in the hall were wondering like when something will 'happen' in this movie. The part before interval contained only dialogues n dialogues....though some of the songs were nice.

You better avoid this film at any costs. If you want to watch this movie, watch it only and only if you can't get good sleep at home, or your air conditioner is damaged! You may give it a try if you want but at your own risk!

First things first, this is not a Ranbir Kapoor movie, he is in an extended cameo, so don't get fooled by all those posters and advertisements. If you watch this movie (which I suggest you shouldn't) you will actually be thankful that this is not a Ranbir Kapoor movie, because nobody wants a brilliant actor like Ranbir to be associated with a movie so pathetic and dragged that for a minute you actually start thinking Dhoom 3 was a watchable movie. Its really tiring to sit through the 150 minutes, I actually went out of the theater twice. There is nothing good happening in the movie, there is only the long shots, the gloomy colors, the monotonousness of the frames, the dragged plot. The actors do nothing except sit and exchange philosophical disclosures that has nothing to do with the film. Both Arjun Rampal and Jacqueline Fernandez are supposed to be film-makers who are making their own films, but still what all we see is them roaming here and there, drinking wine and singing and partying (this is precisely the reason why we are getting such horrible movies from bollywood nowadays).

Even after watching the movie I am not quite sure about what really was the motive behind the movie (none as far as I can see), it might also be because I did not care at all for the movie after an hour or so, I was just sitting there because I had paid for the film.

To anyone who is thinking of going to watch this movie, take a pair of headphones you will need them or rather do not go, wait for a while and soon it will premiere on TV.

The cast and the music had a magnetic effect on me. But once the film reel began rolling, I was experiencing symptoms of depression and schizophrenia.

Roy starts and ends on one single note: blankness. While I am still trying to figure out what the writer intended by conveying such a senseless story, I have not yet recovered from the trauma I had after sitting through two and a half hours of nothingness. Vikramjit Singh's characters are pretentiously polished: Arjun Rampal as an arrogant writer and director who uses a typewriter, Jacqueline Fernandez as a book-loving, reserved filmmaker, and Ranbir Kapoor as a (mute) thief who drives around in a convertible, you know, for the effect. Yes, Kapoor has a total of fifteen dialogs (including "Ooh," "Aah," and "Aao") in the film. (Also, if you observe, the beginning credits introduces Kapoor to be in a "dynamic role." What does the director mean by this? If ever I meet the amateur Vikramjit Singh in a coffee house, I'll make sure that I ask him this question and write a piece about it verbatim.)

The thief in the film introduces himself as a thief so that we don't misconstrue the makers as thieves for robbing us off through the ticket costs. This happens in less than twenty minutes into it, and I did not need any more proof to consider how bad the film was gonna be. Even if I forgo the snail-paced narration, I cannot forgive Singh for botching up the screenplay. It has the worst screenplay I have seen all this year, and it is a good thing from a Bollywood point of view. The story constructed is so choppy, I bet you will turn to your therapist after watching it.

Bad cinematography and good photography mix together and bring out blues in the exotic locales the film has been shot in. The dialogs are plain bad, and so is the cast performance. Only Rampal comes out as an average player.

If you want me to tell it, then, yes, the music and songs are good. Period. But the score is repetitive, often sampling many of the songs' melodies. I bet most of us have seen the best parts of the movie in the trailer, and if you were to divide Roy, as a film, into two parts: one as the trailer, and one as the film intrinsically, you would have two polarizing videos.

BOTTOM LINE: There is not an iota of thrill in the storyline, nor is the story fathomable. Roy only looks good in the trailer, and for a moment there, I even thought the whole film was a tediously long advertisement for Godrej lockers and CCTV cameras. Regretlessly Avoidable!

Can be watched with a typical Indian family? YES

This is my first review. I had to write it because this is the movie I stepped out of in an hour even when I had no other plans. It's awful.

• Fake accents dripping into Hindi as well - Arjun Rampal could have been replaced with a cactus with zero change in the quality of cast (really) - Again, atrociously incorrect fake accents - Dialogues so cheesy and dumb that you will get tired rolling your eyes.

• Arjun Rampal's character was trying to be as witty as Dr. House failing miserably.

• I can't say how bad the story was because, like I said, I left the cinema after an hour of sheer torture.

Take your money and meticulously tear it into 100 small pieces. You'll get more mental stimulation from that than watching this movie.