Nightmare on 34th Street

Stumbling upon the 2023 horror comedy movie "Nightmare On 34th Street", from writer and director James Crow, here in 2024, of course I opted to sit down and watch it, as it was horror comedy that I hadn't already seen. Sure, I had never heard about the movie prior to stumbling upon it, so I didn't know what I was in for, nor did I have any expectations.

Granted, as I am not overly much a fan of horror anthologies in general, then I might have skipped on "Nightmare On 34th Street" if I had known that it was a horror anthology prior to watching it. But having started on the movie already before figuring out it was an anthology, I opted to give writer and director James Crow the benefit of the doubt.

Needless to say that I wasn't familiar with a single actor or actress on the cast list here. It should be noted that the acting performances were actually not too bad, just a shame that the contents of the script was subpar and giving the performers very little to work with.

I have to say that I found little enjoyment in the stories, or segments, of this anthology, so I should have skipped on it and just chalked it up on a hunch of it being probably just another bad horror anthology. It felt like a rather ambitious home video project.

"Nightmare On 34th Street" is listed as a horror comedy. Right. Well, you have to look hard and turn over every stone in order to find the comedy here.

If you enjoy horror anthologies, do yourself a favor and skip on this one, because this anthology just simply isn't worth the time, money or effort.

My rating of "Nightmare On 34th Street" lands on a generous three out of ten stars.

Nightmare On 34th Street is an anthology consisting of 4 Christmas themed horror shorts...with the overarching theme being that they are being told to a young boy, by a disgruntled Santa Claus- turned killer- on Christmas Eve.

The first story is about the exploits of a gang of serial killers that are dressed up as "Mr. Red", an elf, and snowman...who have kidnapped a pair of siblings, and brainwashed them to join their killing spree, after having killed their parents.

The next tale is about a struggling, coke addicted, ventriloquist, whose puppet is a vulgar snowman named "Mr. White"...and possibly also a killer.

The third story revolves around a mentally ill mother who is egged on by Krampus to kill her kids.

While the last story is about a killer priest- who buries his victims alive- getting his comeuppance.

As far as low budget anthologies go...this one isn't half bad.

Though, the quality of the shorts vary.

With the one about the ventriloquist and his snowman puppet standing out above the rest.

That being said...the writing is better than the execution.

As some might be turned off by the production quality.

But it seems, to me, that they did pretty well with what they had to work with.

Though I felt it could have been a little bit shorter.

That aside, I thought it was entertaining enough...in a very mid kind of way.

3.5 out of 10.

After killing off his family, a deranged killer dressed as Santa Claus decides to tell the young child left behind vicious stories about the holiday.

The Good Stor(ies): Story 2-Staying home to watch his brothers, a teen tries not to let his friend rob the house end up succumbing to a crazed killer running loose in the house. This turned out to be a generally fun and likable slasher short. The idea of the specific killer coming to the house and conducting the rampage they do against the rotten group of friends that are present there is a lot of fun and features some great aftermath kills that lead to the big twist revealed in the end which is quite shocking to see in concept yet shows off the one lone issue here in how it doesn't make any logical sense to how everything takes place. This is due to how the twist affects the events that took place previously, but beyond this, there's not much to dislike with this one.

The Bad Stor(ies): Story 1-After their Christmas is ruined, a strained family fallen on hard times is visited by the mischievous Krampus to play off a spur-of-the-moment wish. This was a genuinely disappointing effort that does have some promise. The great setup is something that can have a bit of fun involved with the early setup showing how their lives have turned out for the holiday for the holiday and the antics of their unwarranted visitor result in some gruesome encounters that give this some likable qualities. However, only the mother is sympathetic with everyone else being selfish pricks unhappy with their lot in life and the whole affair is draped in an air of low-budget indifference that robs this of the atmosphere it's trying to present.

Story 3-Left alone with her client, a health-care worker alerts a woman and her husband that the house has been overrun by a group of youths seeking revenge for his past. There was a decent idea at the center of this one but not much else going for it. The uncertainty of the mysterious quote and its purpose gives this a bit of intrigue as this goes along but there's not a lot otherwise going on here with the reveal undergoing a lot of the mystery in this one. That brings about a general air of apathy here that's immensely underwhelming as that makes the whole affair less intimidating and imposing than it had been beforehand so this just ends up being a giant waste with the purpose being undone by these revelations.

Story 4-After being fired from his job, a man who works as a mall store Santa invades a series of residences seeking revenge on various families. This was a massive misfire of a segment that has very little going for it. The main purpose has potential until the majority of the kills are carried out by poisoning as most of the actual kills take place off-camera and stumbling upon it later while the poisoning bits only seem to work if the characters who continually find the particular poisoned objects and proceed to eat them so they look like braindead morons of the worst order. With an unlikable family and lame setups to continue the rampage being the wrap-around background, this is a bit underwhelming to end this on.

Rated Unrated/R: Graphic Violence, Graphic Language, and children-in-jeopardy.

I recently watched the UK 🇬🇧 Christmas horror anthology Nightmare on 34th Street (2023) on Tubi. The story follows a young man named Peter as he is visited by Santa, who tells him four short horror stories.

Written and directed by James Crow (House of Salem), the film stars Dani Thompson (Christmas Slay), Adam Thomas Wright (The Awakening), and Jon Vangdal Aamaas (The Devil's Machine).

This is a low-budget horror anthology that suffers from poor execution and fails to deliver enough substance, despite its lengthy 2-hour, 9-minute runtime. The opening scene is passable, and while the backstories of the segments are somewhat unique, the plots are average at best. The snowman sequence stands out as the most entertaining part of the film. However, the Krampus story features the worst Krampus costume I've ever seen, which detracts significantly from its impact.

In conclusion, Nightmare on 34th Street has a few fun moments but ultimately falls short. I'd rate it 4/10 and only recommend it if you go in with low expectations.