I really wanted to like Almost Cops. The premise seemed entertaining, the humor felt familiar, and the story had potential. But unfortunately, this movie is yet another example of why Dutch cinema struggles to be taken seriously at times.
The first half hour already made it clear: the writing is okay, some of the jokes are genuinely funny, and the setup has promise. But all of that falls completely flat because of one fatal flaw; the acting.
The performances are so painfully bad that they pull you out of the story again and again. There's no authenticity, no rhythm, no believability. Scenes that were meant to be funny or moving end up feeling awkward and forced. The actors deliver their lines like they're reading from cue cards for the first time. And that's a shame, because the plot actually had something going for it.
In fact, this seems to be a recurring problem in Dutch comedy films. Without strong, believable performances, even decent scripts crumble into something resembling parody. Instead of building a strong cinematic culture, films like Almost Cops drag it down further, turning potentially entertaining ideas into embarrassing misses.
I've sat through the Bon Bini movies too and I only endured them because of Phi Nguyen (Ping Ping), who's genuinely funny and has charisma. He's the kind of actor who should be given more serious roles or even his own film. Give us a Dutch The Saint with Phi Nguyen; now that's something I'd show up for.
But until the Dutch film industry starts demanding more from its casting and acting direction, we're going to keep getting films like Almost Cops; lazy, disappointing, and worse, forgettable.
Dear Dutch filmmakers: the audience deserves better than this. Please give us movies we can actually be proud of.
