Crackcoon

Based off of the name, people would associate this film as the inspiration taken from Cocaine Bear. However of course it's not nearly as good given the story, the characters and most importantly the budget. There's nothing special in this film. It's simply about a fake puppet looking raccoon who stumbles upon a bag filled with "rare" drugs, injects it then turns into a crazed killing machine.

The story is filled with a bunch of random intersecting characters with essentially the leads being an over the top unfunny couple, a woman and a sheriff. Jessa Flux also features briefly here and she has her customary shower skin scene plus more (1:13:30, 1:17:40). The film does pick up in the second half but essentially it's just not a "so bad it's good" film and it's not a future cult classic.

Quote from chaz: "yo yo yo, what's up my?" The godfather of this century!

An absolute masterpiece of the cinema. I haven't seen a movie that has such cohesiveness and connecability with the actors. The acting is flawless, the puppet is flawless, the crack's acting is flawless. It is the best thing I have seen in the last century. Beyond compare. Most of the bad reviews were people that were envious of the film's success. The dialogue is well thought out. The props are immaculate (including the empty beer bottle he was drinking). In short, this film is a masterpiece that needs to be shown to every child of the world. It has brought me to tears, and is beyond comprehension.

From the outset, the screenplay, direction, cinematography, and overall production felt painfully low-budget and reminiscent of D-list horrors. The film was so excruciating to sit through, it ranks among the most grotesque and nonsensical I've ever encountered. I was genuinely shocked by how poorly directed this film was.

Now, about the raccoon: it resembled a bizarre cross between an animatronic and a stuffed toy gone rogue. When it lunged at its victims, it looked like a prop pulled from a discount store. The attempts to create a terrifying creature fell flat, and the moments where they resorted to CGI were laughably bad. It was as if they had a limited budget and decided to throw together whatever they could find.

I had actually been looking forward to this movie ever since I first saw the poster/cover when it was revealed. Sure, I wasn't harboring any grand expectations, as there has been a bunch of questionable movies with animals on drugs after the success of "Cocaine Bear". But, the movie's cover/poster really was interesting, and the movie's concept was interesting.

And finally I had the chance to sit down and watch director Brad Twigg's 2024 movie "Crackcoon". So was it worth the wait? No, not really. Sure, "Crackcoon" was better than many of the other low budget movies with animals on drugs, but it was nowhere near the league of "Cocaine Bear". Sure, it was watchable, but it just wasn't an outstanding or particular memorable viewing experience.

Of course I wasn't familiar with a single actor or actress on the cast list. And that is actually something I enjoy when I sit down to watch movies. The acting performances in "Crackcoon" were fair. Of the entire cast ensemble, it was only actress Rosaria Eraso that managed to stand up in my opinion.

The raccoon looked rather fake, especially since it was relatively inarticulate and moved about in a lifeless manner.

The movie does have a fair share of blood and gore, which wasn't the best of special effects, but it was actually sufficiently gory enough to lift up the movie a notch or two.

Ultimately I found "Crackcoon" somewhat of a disappointing movie. But if you enjoy outrageous horror comedies, then you might consider giving this movie a chance.

My rating of "Crackcoon" lands on a four out of ten stars.

Could best be described as a white exploitation film. No fear factor supplied by mediocre characters. Perhaps some acting classes and a non bubble gum budget could have made this film tolerable. The ratty assed racoon looked like it was designed by blind highschool children. The nude scenes couldn't save this one. The opening scene cuts to inexplicable morgue scene. The portrayal of the gay men was lame. I gave one star for the sheriff's wife's boobs. The best thing about the movie is that it ended. I am praying to the movie gods that there will not be a sequel. Mankind has suffered enough misery.