Disaster Wars: Earthquake vs. Tsunami

"Disaster Wars: Earthquake vs. Tsunami" was a disaster movie in every sense of the word, literally.

The storyline was fairly generic for a movie of this genre. Mankind sets off a massive natural disaster that proves deadly and it is a race against time to find a way to stop this event before it lays destruction and waste to the world as we know it.

Right... Nothing new there in the storyline department. Aside from it being very boring and uninteresting.

The effects in the movie were abysmal, and I wonder how a special effects team in 2013 could look at the effects that they made for this movie and seriously go "yeah, this looks good. The audience will really buy into this." It was without a doubt the worst CGI effects I have ever witnessed in a movie, and believe you me I have seen many a bad movies in my time.

As for the acting, well just watch the first 5-10 minutes, with the submersible scene, and the level of acting for the rest of the movie is pretty much determined. It seemed that no one on the cast list were buying into the storyline, and it showed blatantly on the screen, because the performances were not even half-hearted.

There are many really bad movies about natural disasters, but "Disaster Wars: Earthquake vs. Tsunami" really is the icing on the cake of bad disaster movies.

Not even 20 minutes into the movie, I was starting to drift to do other stuff and it was a losing battle to keep the attention span to the movie, because it was just so bad.

I suffered through the 85 minutes of this movie so you don't have to. Heed my warning, and stay well away from "Disaster Wars: Earthquake vs. Tsunami".

A generous 1 out of 10 stars...

Stormageddon: Earthquake vs. Tsunami is one of those rarities where it was a real struggle to stick with it well before the halfway mark, but because it is a personal rule never to judge a film without seeing the whole thing, stuck with it I did but with a lot of regret afterwards. Stormageddon: Earthquake vs. Tsunami is down there with the worst disaster movies ever made and a very strong contender for THE worst and certainly the most amateurish, managing to do the impossible and make the movies from The Asylum look good. Not in a long while has there been a cheaper-looking movie, true there are a lot of badly made movies seen recently but even they were not this cheap. The camera work will be the nightmare of epilepsy sufferers(coming from an epileptic here), even for the deliberate use of shaky-cam it felt far too excessive and unnecessary often. The photography is as dreary as muddy water and you'd be hard pressed to find any worse-looking special effects, looking 30 years at least out of date, under-proportioned and like they were made at last minute with scarce left-over materials to say they're amateurish is being generous. The sound is a lot of the time so muffled and distant that it is not always easy to make out the dialogue. From what you can hear of them though it is certainly not anything to write home about, the entire script sounding like total, incoherent and improvised-sounding gibberish, leaves a lot under-explained and does nothing to develop or humanise the characters. The concept was a very old and predictable one, but Stormageddon: Earthquake vs. Tsunami does nothing new or fun with it. Instead it's pedestrian nonsense from start to finish to the extent it is even devoid of unintentional/novelty humour and there are no thrills or suspense whatsoever. The characters can barely pass for characters, having absolutely nothing to them let alone a personality, the direction is just incompetent and there are dire performances from the entire cast who look bored out of their skulls and like they were held at gun-point. The overwrought, exaggerated crying, facial expressions that were either creepy or shockingly comical and the static posing betray a complete lack of acting talent. All in all, an appalling movie, not just one of the worst of the disaster movie genre but quite possibly one of the worst of any genre and film in general. 0/10 (a rating I do not give out often). Bethany Cox

I have a sickness. I find appalling movies gratifying. I've become so fond of them that I'm literally filled with glee when I see one. The worse it is, the more joy I appear to gain from it.

Thus, I am a living, breathing meter of terrible. And I can tell you that my meter is off the charts on this one. I'm practically reeling in elation, and trust me, this is bad for you sane people.

(The following text will be a series of hyperboles designed to push forth the general impression that the movie was bad. If you feel the need to stop reading now, I forgive you. Go in peace.)

This is the first time I've ever looked at a film and said to myself, "You know what.. I think I could do better. By myself even." The special effects are downright horrifying. Horrifyingly bad that is. I have seen a friend of mine work with freeware software for a class project, and even he did better than what I just saw. These special effects are on the same level as "Birdemic" and "MegaPiranha." They are that bad (I recommend both movies, by the way.. Though you may hate me for it).

How about the acting? Believe me, watching a dog bark at itself in a mirror will give you more empathy than anything you'll get from the acting in this one. How any director could look at this and say, "Yes, this works. It's really creating the mood," is a mystery to me. I don't think any other actors could possibly make an impending catastrophe appear to be less worthy of heartfelt emotion. The dialogue was so incredibly dry, and deeply inept.

The best acting in the whole movie had to be the bums. They were great.

What about the plot? Plot holes don't just exist, they hit you in the face with a shovel. The level of stupid is so high that it might actually seep out of your screen and get on you. I'm not going to bother giving examples, that would be cheating. But trust me, common sense doesn't exist in this one.

I realize that budgetary concerns are commonly used as an excuse, but realistically there is no excuse. Amazing movies have been created on very tight budgets. If your special effects are bad, tighten your acting. If the acting is poor, smooth out the plot. There are ways to concentrate on the winning points of your feature. Even with everything else being terrible, your movie can still be entertaining and fun! This director failed to pick a winning point, but instead attempted to do everything at once, and the film had almost no noteworthy moments. Sadly, there was simply just no entertainment.

The acting producer should be able to tell right away that something is wrong, and make appropriate course corrections for the production. For instance, the special effects: "Let's see, earthquakes, falling debris, tsunamis, satellites, lasers, nuclear explosions, submarines, bullet wounds and military technology ambiance. And I have a budget of.. Ah hell no. Something's got to go." This would have been a better answer than, "Awwright! We have a computer! Let's do it!"

Lastly, I confess that it brings me joy to inflict this sort of insipid cinema on people. Please watch it. For me? xxoxxo, bye bye now.

This has to be one of the worst movies I have ever seen. It does something which I thought was impossible, which was to make the Asylum movies look good.

The story is bad. The plot holes are so big you could probably lose a planet in them. Maybe even a solar system.

The actors all look and sound bored. As far as I can see, none of them seem to be even making any effort to act. Much of the stuff they do doesn't seem to make sense, even in the context of the movie.

The sound is bad - most of it sounds like it was recorded in a bathroom.

The special effects are really... special. Flying debris is represented by random black dots superimposed over the image, not connected to anything. And those are some of the better special effects. The final scene is so badly done it has to be seen to be believed.

Several of the scenes are just totally unrelated stock footage that was spliced in, and in many cases are so jarringly out of place that I had to rewind just to make sure I had actually seen what I though I had seen.

I understand that this was done with a low budget, but man, even with a low budget, they could at least have made an effort. The impression I get from this movie is that nobody cared enough to even try. Watch at your own peril.

I remember saying over and over again..."Are you kidding me"? I had to check the spoiler box, because to describe some of the ridiculous scenes that passed for a movie these days was absolutely necessary in hopes to save the rest of mankind from wasting one second of their precious time to think they might want to watch this.

You've got a supposed geological expert dragged out of his house in the early morning and forced to "help" the Vice President save the world, yet he has to do it all while wearing his bathrobe. Lol They wouldn't even let him change into clothes. Hilarious.

Then, two idiots on a sailboat are filming a live segment for a news channel. Really? HOW did they do that? They had a regular cam sitting on a tripod. You know, the ones you'd use for home movies and yet they were going "live" on the air. Really? How was this gal knowing when they were going live? She had no headset on. The entire time they were supposedly on the air, the camera bobbed up and down because the boat was riding the waves. I swear, this had to be one of the dumbest things I've ever seen on film.

LOVE the two kids holding down the fort in Hawaii where their job is watching for earthquakes and warning the public to evacuate. Seriously? I thought highly trained meteorologists did that kind of work. Not two goofy kids. They looked like teens.

Every single person involved with this film (and I use the term loosely) could not act. Not one bit. Even Priscilla Barnes was horrendous. She also looks really bad. There were so many pauses before the next person would say their dumb lines. Only a very bad director allows this to happen.

I've seen really bad movies, but this should never have made it to even television. My high school cinema class handed in better movies.