Lord of Tears

Atmosphere, yes. Great locations, yes. Interesting enough premise, yes. And I didn't notice that the lead male couldn't act until "Eve" showed up. She can act, but at the community theater level. Lordy, when she said "I'm from the South" in that "I'm not from the South and I don't think I've ever been there" accent it was over. Oh, did you know she trained as a dancer? Well, golly, there's a scene where she spins.

It's just all fluff and stiff moments with decent locales, some nice nature shots, and a MYSTERY!

Wow, either director Lawrie Brewster recruited all his friends and relatives to give high ratings and write favorable reviews for his film, OR none of the avid fanatics around here has ever seen a genuinely atmospheric Gothic horror movie. I'm sure my user comment will receive a lot of not-useful votes, but what the hell, "Lord of Tears" does not deserve its current 7.1 out of 10 rating and please do not be deceived by the plenty of comments stating it's an impeccable new genre classic. There, I said it. However, I do admit that the film is a worthwhile and well-crafted attempt at traditional & spooky horror with beautiful scenery and filming locations, an admirably melancholic ambiance and – most of all – an authentically creepy monster! The Owl Man, which you can admire on the cover artwork, is a nightmarish creature with impressive mask and claws that demands for a specific type of sacrifices. The timid school teacher James Findlay has been plagued by visions of this creature ever since his childhood, but now he can confront his traumas because James' mother died and he inherited the parental "Baldurroc Mansion" in the Scottish Highlands. James believes all his phobias originate from this place and, together with the lovely caretaker Eve, he begins to investigate the hidden secrets of the estate. Okay, so far so good, then why exactly isn't "Lord of Tears" as magnificent as it ought to be? Basically because the actual plot is feather light and ultra-thin and there are only two principal characters (and one reasonably significant supportive character) in the entire movie. Brewster compensates for the lack of variety through (over-)long sequences that stylishly build up tension and atmosphere, but they lead absolutely nowhere. You know what kind of sequences I mean: sudden apparitions of the creature underneath a tree, but it vanishes when the protagonist looks again, abruptly ending dream sequences, the clichéd use of creepy children's drawings, etc etc.. The denouement – as in the revelation of the Findlay family secret – doesn't make any sense and raises more questions than the script can answer. The acting performance of Euan Douglas is quite pitiable and the beautiful Alexandra Hulme doesn't convince either. David Schofield's sinister voice is underused. Lawrie Brewster and Sarah Daly (the writer) definitely show talent and growth potential, but "Lord of Tears" is overall unmemorable and weak. Okay, go ahead, hit the non-useful button if you must

Wow. Just. Holy cow, what a cringefest. I mean, I am pretty tolerant of cheese you guys, but this stinks. It stinks. What a tremendously awful film. Almost everything about it just assaulted my senses. To be fair, the scenery was beautiful and the setting deserved a better movie. But they don't get credit for Scotland being cool.

The writing was awful, the plot boring, the acting - dear god. Who are these people? Why are they in a movie? Who let this happen? These characters are zero-dimensional, and these actors should stop. Just stop now and pursue other career choices.

You know when you are watching a movie and it's so bad you are embarrassed when other people walk in the room? Like you have to have an excuse for why it's so awful? This is that. They are lucky Scotland is eerie, or this 2 would have been a 1.

Director Lawrie Brewster's LORD OF TEARS is the story of James Findlay (Eaun Douglas), who has inherited his family estate in the Scottish highlands. Said estate was the source of many childhood nightmares for young James. His late mother even attempts to dissuade him, via a letter left for him, from moving into the place.

Unperturbed, James moves right in... and the new nightmare begins.

First off, let's talk about the house itself, which is one creepy place! The exterior looks like an ancient asylum crossed with a mausoleum. The interior is a labyrinthine collection of tight hallways, countless rooms, and winding staircases. In a word, it's perfect!

Strange occurrences start almost immediately.

Enter Eve (Alexandra "Lexy" Hulme), an American woman who is eager to help James uncover the truth about his past. Ms. Hulme's Eve is a beguiling, playful woman whose every move seems seductive. Her dance and swimming pool entrance scenes are unforgettable! There's something different about Eve. Something mysterious and somehow foreboding. She undergoes a transformation that almost defies description. Ms. Hulme delivers the terror in spades!

Brewster captures a growing sense of dread, perfectly. His film is fittingly surreal without tumbling into absurdity. It's also scary as hell! The house, the grounds, and the surrounding landscape are characters in themselves. This is for those who enjoy the macabre, the gloomy, and the doom-filled.

And we haven't even mentioned the enigmatic Owl Man...

I never "review" movies, but when horror breaks what I consider to be the #1 cardinal rule of the genre, it makes me almost angry for some reason. That rule, which is an entirely personal one, is that if you're going to take yourself dead seriously with your horror movie, you damn well better have good acting. Your story has to embrace camp in order for bad acting to have any hope of working. The lead actors ability is to me only a few small steps above infomercial quality. There is no feeling to his performance here whatsoever, especially when it calls for dire emotion which it does much too often. The story's execution, although interesting on paper, really doesn't do him or the lead actress any favours. I couldn't in good conscience rate it as low as possible because there are three things, a star for each, that to me must be commended: 1) The location and cinematography that takes place outdoors is fantastic. Beautiful stuff. 2) The lead actress is absolutely gorgeous here, and her performance singlehandedly carried me through to the end, which I could barely believe I made it to. She is embarrassingly cheesy in the third act, which I won't spoil here, but that is entirely the fault of the filmmakers. She did what she could with what she was given. 3) The movie is dedicated to Christopher Lee. This one is self explanatory.

3/10