Bling Ring

This is barely a story. The entire thing is just an endless repeat of the main "characters" robbing celebrities' houses and partying at the club afterwards, in fact it's as if one scene just got stuck and repeated over and over again until it created a black hole of bad dialogue, flashing lights, pulsing music and annoying teenage girls. It's all simply nauseating!

The few nice things that can be said about this "film", such as the great cinematography and the talented main actors who try their hardest to say the terrible lines they're given, aren't enough to save it.

The Bling Ring pace was fast simply because the kids went from one burglary to the next without much else in between. The acting, what there was of it, was okay. And Emily Watson's Valley Girl accent was spot on. But, there was hardly any character development.

How did these well-off privileged kids turn into obsessive narcissists? What are they doing now? There was no reaction shown from the victims.

The kids parents played minor roles in the film and they showed little reaction to the crimes their kids committed.

The film seemed a rush through the plot without bringing into play all the elements that one would expect in this real life caper plot. In the end it seemed more like an outline for a film rather than a completed film.

The collective level of vapidity on display in the Bling Ring might (like totally) reach epic proportions.

Award-winning, insightful director, Sofia Coppola, has once again made a film that is highly successful in portraying fame and celebrity ... only this time she has turned the cameras onto those who obsess over and covet the fame and celebrity others have.

The Bling Ring is a character study/meditation of a group of people -- based on real life individuals in SoCal -- with NO character whatsoever. They are all beautiful bling on the outside with no inner core of morality. They are shells of a mass emptiness who worship others for merely having stuff they want ... or being on their TVs.

Coppola's story is based on real-life events of a group of five vacuous and insipid teenagers (one boy and four girls) who used the internet to track the whereabouts of their "celebrity" idols -- some were merely "reality stars" -- so that when the stars were out of town the five could play. The five would break into celeb houses and play with beautiful things that belonged to Paris Hilton, Rachel Bilson, Orlando Bloom, Audrina Patridge or ... their ultimate idol, Lindsay Lohan. They also ended up pocketing and stealing a lot of designer goods and merchandise (you know, like to wear and be cool with). They had fun and bragged about their shenanigans at parties and on social media all the while believing that they had done nothing wrong. One even believes this happened in order for her to become more charitable -- her comment on "karma" must be heard to be believed. Coppola wisely lifted this line word-for-word as it is tragic comic gold.

Emma Watson (Harry Potter, Perks of Being a Wallflower) is the most-recognizable face in the cast and she totally has the film's bestest lines! Watson is a genius comedienne ... who knew? Her line delivery and depiction of oblivious shame are perfect.

Coppola understands the world of fame and she has proved she also understand the world of those who dream of it. This isn't a movie in which characters learn life lessons and change ... this is a depiction of people who believe they do no wrong (like never ever). It is eye-opening because these people walk amongst us. The film is full of face palm, jaw drop and eye rolling moments. Like ... a lot. Totally.

Sofia Coppola brings us this inspired by true story movie. Rebecca (Katie Chang), and new kid Marc (Israel Broussard) go to dropout school Indian Hills. She's a petty thief and he gets sucked up into her world. They break into people's home when they're away. Soon their friends Chloe (Claire Julien), Nicki (Emma Watson) and Sam (Taissa Farmiga) join in the Bling Ring.

This is a damning portrayal of superficial vapid kids. The problem is that they're actually very boring with their self-indulgent celebrity-obsessed lives. It may be that Coppola is making a statement, but the jabs need to be much sharper. It's interesting to see the unabashed consumerism for about 15 minutes but the constant flood of fashionista names gets tired. The long takes do nothing but add to the sense of superficiality. Maybe that's the point. The narrative goes nowhere. The story is basically laid out by the first 5 minutes if not sooner. There is a change when they're arrested. Emma Watson is especially good in this part. I just wish that the movie isn't 95% pre-arrest. The characters are too similar before their arrest anyways. They all talk the same and act the same. They need a jolt in their system to bring out something deeper.

The Bling Ring is a stunningly shot, visually entertaining film that strives to make a statement about materialism and young teens' fame obsessions. Unfortunately, Sofia Coppola fails to translate her vision into a substantiated plot that develops a story and protagonists; neither of which, are worth caring about. Aside from Emma Watson's intimidating performance, the acting is sub-par which aids in the instantaneous transition from Coppola's attempts to create a smart, creative film to a shallow, unsatisfactory film that feels quite unfinished. The idea of The Bling Ring is fresh, however you cannot help but ignore the large lack of intellectual Bling, the film once promised or Coppola might have hoped for.