1313: Bigfoot Island

Wow Wow Wow this may be the worst movie I have ever scene it's all just shirtless men wondering around for way too long and sometimes the worst looking Bigfoot imaginable appears and kills him, every male character is shirtless for no reason and when they get killed the Bigfoot doesn't even seem to be in the same area as them the director was that lazy. About the plot it is almost non existent, it's hardly explained at all. THE BIGFOOT costume oh my I could have bought that on eBay for twenty dollars when it runs you can see it is obviously just a guy in some cheap suit. Every walking scene and every scene in general goes on too long, a walking scene in the beginning lasted at least ten whole minutes and a shower scene lasted at least four, Never watch this movie or you may die of boredom.

For a series of movies that are under the 1313 name, this is one that was probably less of a plot than the other ones. Filming was not all that bad but there were a few noticeable mistakes. I will admit the scenery is breathtaking.

As for Bigfoot, did not know he was ever portrayed having red fur.

There is a second person walking down the road but with no backpack, suitcase or anything.

As for the girl, unfortunately, what does she have to do with the movie? I am beginning to think that maybe she is bigfoot.

Apparently, cell phones get great reception on this island of which I have only seen one home. Low budget but great cinematography. Sort of.

What in gods name is going on here. Just terrible! Bunch of long scenes of guys running shirtless in the woods.

1313: Bigfoot Island (2012)

BOMB (out of 4)

Beyond awful film from David DeCoteau has a bunch of topless guys walking around and there's also an incredibly awful looking bigfoot costume.

Sorry if that's not enough of a plot description but that's pretty much all you need to know. This film is aimed at the gay community so that will explain why there are so many male models walking around without their shirts on. I don't mind that because, well, most horror films have topless women walking around so why not make things even? What I hated about this film as well as others like it is the fact that there's nothing going on.

I love bad movies and low-budget movies but I almost struggle to call this thing a movie because you've basically got no plot and a camera capturing people walking around. I mean, who on Earth is this movie aimed at? Who is going to like watching this? As I said, I understand that the horror films of the 80s and beyond featured naked women but at the same time we were also given some sort of story. There's nothing like that here.

Where do I start?

This steaming pile of crap is just so boring! Without giving away too much of the "plot", the movie revolves around a group of college frat boys who arrive on the eponymous Bigfoot Island to party? Prepare for a GQ shoot? I'm not really sure, and frankly I could not care less.

When the first ten minutes or so is just following one of the Calvin Klein rejects around, broken up by a short scene of bad acting into a cellphone, you can see why I lost interest.

As for the "plot", there isn't one. Well, that's not entirely true, there is a plot but its so thin as to be nonexistent, and thus pointless. My God this movie sucks.

I really can only think of one good point from this film, the cinematography was actually quite good right up until you see "bigfoot", and then it all goes down hill from there.

I'm not going into the monster effects, suffice it to say they spent all their money on the opening. So, five thousand bucks well spent, perhaps next time guys you might want to consider putting more of that budget into a script, with a plot.