The Amityville Haunting

I thought I would be soon over these stupid "Amityville" movies for Book Month, but there's always more of them! They just keep getting worse! This film once again starts by claiming it's based on a true story. For the umpteenth time, none of this was based on a true story and the author admitted to making the whole thing up! It was based on a novel, not a work of non-fiction! I hope James Randi cancels these films.

This doesn't even have much to do with the actual Amityville story. There's a few allusions here and there, like the flies. This movie is dreadfully boring. It's basically trying to cash in on the "Paranormal Activity" movies and behaves exactly like them! Well, I guess a lot of found footage films act like this. The point is that new people are moving into the Amityville house and their son records everything weird that happens.

There's a scene where a ghost just appears and does nothing for a full minute. I haven't seen every single "Amityville" so forgive me if I missed something. The ending is probably the worst as it features the dad going nuts and acting like an idiot. He's just beating up air in one scene. People are violently killed throughout the beginning of the film and the family still stays there! It's a pointless clichéd film and I'm glad to be done with these stupid movies. *

Please note: I didn't realise THE AMITYVILLE HAUNTING was produced by The Asylum before I purchased it, otherwise I might have had second thoughts. This turns out to be a found footage twist on the whole AMITYVILLE HORROR franchise, which inevitably rips off just about every found footage movie in existence.

The main "inspiration" behind this film is, clearly, PARANORMAL ACTIVITY, although this movie makes that film look like a masterpiece in comparison. Everything about it is horrible: the acting, the style, the distinct lack of a story, in which the writer just throws everything into the mix in an attempt to make something stick (nothing does). So we get ghostly kids, intruders, doors opening on their own, murders. It's all ludicrous.

The film's main character is a kid, and about half the running time seems to consist of him pointing the camera at the floor while his parents argue; this doesn't make for a good use of screen time. Instead, I was bored witless by it. The only thing that kept me watching was the bad acting of the father, which was pretty amusing. There's quite a bit of incident in the last five minutes (none of which makes much sense) but it comes far too late in the game to make THE AMITYVILLE HAUNTING an interesting film.

Watched 20 minutes of this utter waste of film space before I couldn't handle the DT's of camera work any further. OK, so since the first Amityville, there has been a keen interest in the paranormal & the story surrounding the so called Amityville Horror. I could have asked my 3 year old son to hold the cam steadier than the actors or so called actors in this so called movie. It is really that bad, not anywhere near the hopeless camera work of Blair Witch or Paranormal Activity, 100 times worse than that. If you're looking for a scare, go to Walmart & watch what some shoppers choose to wear when spending up big. Please, save your 30 seconds of your life in watching this trash. You will thank me later.

This movie was one of the worst waste of times I have ever had to sit through. Already from the very beginning, it was painstakingly obvious that this was going to be another delve into the likes of "Paranormal Activity" (which I didn't enjoy either).

But this movie? Come on! They take the Amityville name and then hype it up with one of these oh-so-great-and-oh-so-spooky documentaries, making it into a modern day version of the "Blairwitch Project". Yeah, great. Oh wait, except for it didn't working on any level.

The movie was an endless stream of really bad camera work, interrupted by this blackening-out screen and static sound whenever the entity was about to make something happen or make an appearance. What was up with that? I got thoroughly frustrated by the crappy camera work and the static sounds just added fuel to the fire called irritation with the movie.

"Amityville Haunting" is one of the most uneventful and frightfully boring movies I had ever had to sit through. Nothing even remotely scary happened throughout the entire movie, and I actually dozed off once or twice.

I am not a fan of movies of this caliber, and I didn't particularly enjoy any of the "Paranormal Activity" movies either, but checked them out because of the hype that was surrounding them. "Amityville Haunting", however, is just a cheap imitation of those movies, and then it is wrapped in a casing called "Amityville", a name that us horror fans will recognize from the early 80's.

"Amityville Haunting" was a sad excuse for a movie, and I wasn't the least bit entertained. If you are looking for a horror movie for the evening, or hoping to have at least a single scare, please, oh please, do pick another movie, because "Amityville Haunting" is just not worth it.

My Amityville binge has led me to this, a found footage movie set in a world where Amityville has been recognised, made into movies and books and yet another family moves into the infamous house anyway.

As with all found footage films very little happens and this is 80 minutes of sheer unadulterated boredom.

What makes it worse (If that's possible) is that it's not even the Amityville house despite being said multiple times that it is. Both inside and out that becomes blatantly apparent and really is seven shades of stupid.

So we have shaky cam, we have night vision cam and we have the obligatory handicam filmed by someone who absolutely positively has to record everything for some reason.

In true Amityville style people change, folks turn on each other and yet somehow this is the worst one yet.

The Good:

It ended, that bit was good

The Bad:

That had to be the least sexy sex scene since the zombie humping in Braindead (1992)

NOT the Amityville house

The "Warning" real footage thing is getting dumb

Things I Learnt From This Movie:

The fact that there are no opening credits, no closing credits and therefore everyone involved is uncredited screams volumes

Someone should really trademark Amityville so Joe Talentless can't keep adding it to his film