And Then I Go

This film is underrated. I don't know why do people compare it to other ones in this topic and genre. The actor's play was actually amazing, the mood, colors, directing. I could actually see and feel what the main character was feeling. Of course, for people who watch it only to see the massacre - you will be disappointed, because it's not the main purpose of this movie. It's about teen problems, anxiety, depression and loneliness.

AND THEN I GO is a movie about a school shooting, but rather than inspiring anger or outrage, I found it deeply sad and though-provoking. There are flaws, but I encourage thoughtful viewers to take a look.

The film is seen primarily through the eyes of Edwin (Arman Darbo) a very smart and clearly depressed young man. He's one of those kids who doesn't really make friends and doesn't engage much in school life. Dare I say it, he's "misunderstood." (He also endures some pretty nasty bullying.) His parents (Justin Long, Melanie Lynskey) are trying to understand their sullen and angry kid, but they are also clearly frustrated and out of ideas. Dad has resorted to glibness and mockery, and mom is just trying to be placating. There is also a much younger brother, and we see through his reactions to his brother that Edwin is capable of love. And while most of his teachers and school administrators are equally frustrated with him ("you're a smart kid; why can't you behave and do your work"), Edwin does find a spark of interest in art class, and his teacher puts him in a group art project with two young ladies who are actually happy to have him on their project because they see his skill. Edwin slowly and reluctantly warms to their casual friendliness and genuine compliments.

If all this sounds like I've spoiled much of the movie, what I've really done is told you about a movie that COULD have happened. An exploration of a young boy growing into manhood and into finding a tentative place for himself in the world. That might have been something like a very low-key EIGHTH GRADE, but for boys.

Unfortunately, Edwin has had one friend since he was a little kid. The whip-smart but sociopathic Flake (Sawyer Barth) who has endured similar bullying and a similar sense of disconnection from the world around him. But his parents have lost interest in him and he clearly feels he has nothing to lose when he starts to push back against the forces that he feels are assailing him (and many of them are). Edwin is torn between his ties to his lone friend, and his deep discomfort with the dark places Flake clearly wants to take him.

The film is though-provoking because it forces the viewer to examine just how far our sympathies can be pushed. Have these boys been betrayed by the adults in their lives who either don't see the danger or don't see how they have failed these kids. But then again, what could the parents be doing better? How far can a school be pushed by bad behavior and acting out? How much should be tolerated? Yet on the other hand, how much should these kids be forced to tolerate themselves? Do we see where this movie concludes as inevitable given all that has gone before...or are these two boys ultimately still monsters (as we would think of them if we just saw a news report with no "background").

And it is sad. Director Vincent Grashaw has not exactly made a briskly paced movie here. Even though it is only 99 minutes, it still feels too long. Many scenes just seem to be repeats of what we've seen before. A point is made, and then the same point is made again, and yet again. But thankfully Darbo's Edwin is amazingly well-rendered. His performance just really made me feel the sadness this character lives with 99.9% of the time (and makes the 0.1% happiness all the more heart-breaking).

Aside from the pacing, the film, aside from the two leads, is not terribly well-acted. Long, Linskey and Tony Hale as the principal are the "biggest" names in the film, but their performances feel a bit phoned-in. Likely the director had limited time with his expensive talent and honestly, the script makes these characters a bit cardboard anyway. And for me, the idea of art class being what finally engages Edwin is so clichéd. It's the trap artists fall into, that only art is redemptive. I appreciated Edwin's journey (thanks, again, to the actor) but still felt there was a lapse of imagination.

Having said all that, on balance, I still very much appreciated this film and the difficult journey it took me through. It isn't "fun" to see this movie, but it's got a lot to offer in its sometimes clumsy way.

This film, dark and spare in the script and the actual cinematographic light cast on its main characters, succeeds in getting the viewer inside every character.

It makes clear the gnarly inchoate incompetence and pain of being thirteen year-old boys, friends since kindergarten, unsuccessful in 'socializing' in middle school.

Clear also is the wide gap parents try to bridge, when they try to fix their kids, objectify their children as problems to be solved by programs and processes, instead of wordless aimless love.

"And Then I Go" has a plot, which dimly echoes the Columbine school tragedy, but that echo isn't the point of the film at all.

It's about the hundreds of blows that being "othered" inflict upon a young and fragile sense of human worth, and the dark pearl that can rise from being hated or dismissed or being made small, a nick at a time.

It's about the tragedy of blind loyalty also. It's about a lot of things, some of which you will see, though I have missed.

Good movies are like that.

This was a profoundly dull movie. It started off on the right foot, but all we saw was this main character Edwin getting bullied by classmates, neighbors, a teacher, his principal, and even his best friend. I liked seeing the closeness between the main character and his younger brother, but that was it. Absolutely nothing significant happened in this movie and no character grew or developed. The parents were just as bad as the bullies and provided no moral compass for their kid.

Here's what could have helped. We see that this young man is good at art. That topic was completely forgotten about. Also the principal suggested the social skills workshop. Why not give this main character the luxury of making more friends and finding his place in the school? The best friend Flake was an obnoxious and cruel kid- it was hard to take him seriously because he never had Edwin's back. Edwin is such a likable kid and was neglected the entire way through.

I will give a bit of praise for Arman Darbo's performance. His narration style and ability to show complex emotions were perfect. He really could be the next Leonardo DiCaprio.

A pretty good film ruined in its final moments. Most films that stop without ending are failures of grace, brains and courage. This is no exception.