The ABCs of Death

When you watch "The ABCs of Death", you're really watching 26 f**ked up short stories that either leave you thinking it was good, or a total piece of crap. About half of these stories are good and the other half suck. The good thing about this is that even if while you're watching one and you think it's horrible, it only lasts about 4 minutes, then a whole new tale begins. There's a lot of graphic scenes in this gritty movie that you might not want to watch if you have a lite stomach. However, for all the gore loving horror freaks out there, I would definitely say its worth a see. I'm not sure of I'd ever watch the full thing again, but there are certainly a couple scenes that I would show my friends/family, and re-watch a couple times. Overall I give this movie a 5/10. Better than what I thought I would give it before I turned it on.

This movie is freakin' insane. THE ABCS OF DEATH is the perfect movie to sit around with your buddies and watch over a few six-packs. It's equal parts hilarious and disturbing, but primarily this movie is an endurance test. Twenty-six short films is a lot to sit through, even when they're universally excellent. The shorts in this ambitious horror anthology range from garbage to golden. But before I even address the films in this collection, I think you have to respect the premise of the film regardless of the quality of its individual parts. THE ABCS OF DEATH gave $5000 each to twenty-six aspiring horror directors and assigned each of them a letter of the alphabet. With their assigned letter, each filmmaker was to shoot a segment based on a word starting with that letter and, of course, relevant to death in some form. Some of the shorts are actually incredibly well done, while some of them seem as if the directors shot whatever they could do in an afternoon and pocketed the majority of their $5000 budget. But, as with any sort of anthology collection, the quality of the shorts are going to run the gamut from one end of the spectrum to the other. There's no good way to address each individual short in a comment like this so I'm just going to shower some praise on a few of the best and warn you about some of the worst of the bunch. Just remember: opinions vary and some might disagree. These are my personal thoughts on the best and worst.

There are some really awesome short films included in this collection. Some of them will blow your mind when you realize it was all done on a meager $5000 budget. The segment "V is for Vagitus" was written and directed by Kaare Andrews and creates a fleshed-out futuristic Vancouver in the course of a few minutes. The production design and effects are fantastic, especially a robot cop named Nezbit. The V segment contains enough ingrained plot that you almost wish it would be expanded into a full-length film. Then there is the hand-full of segments that are just awesome little doses of creative filmmaking. "D is for Dogfight" and "Y is for Youngbuck" (from HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN director Jason Eisener) are some of the best in the series based on creative film-making alone, and "S is for Speed" is a cool little grindhouse short that doesn't seem like much at first but redeems itself in it's final moments when you realize what director Jake West was doing with it. Some directors use their spot in the movie to make a personal statement (such as Jorge Michel Grau or Xavier Glens) while others are just flat-out crazy for the sake of crazy. Admittedly, the craziest ones are my personal favorites and most of them are out of Japan. The letters F, H, J, T, and especially Z are some of the most mind-bogglingly weird portions of the film but they make for the some of the funniest bits (again, especially Z).

On the other end of the spectrum, some of the shorts in the collection just didn't work for me. Thankfully, there are far fewer shorts that fail than succeed. The segment for the letter M (for Miscarriage) seems to be receiving a lot of flack, and it deserves it. It's short, lazy, and aims for a quick shock gag. It's not horrifying, it's just poor taste. I suppose it is a form of death, but the most frightening aspect of the short is the woman's reaction to it. The segment "Q is for Quack" is another lazy film. The majority of the short is director Adam Wingard and producer Simon Barrett complaining about receiving the letter Q for their assignment and it's not quite as funny as I'm sure they were hoping it would be. "C is for Cycle" is an interesting premise but it looks like it was shot on home video and the constant use of fade-outs to change scenes was aggravating, and "O is for Orgasm", while the most artistic of the bunch, feels horribly out of place and grinds the movie to a halt right smack dab in the middle of an already long run-time. On the bright side, all of the weaker shorts in the film occur within the first half and I feel safe in proclaiming that entire last half of the movie is totally worth it.

Some segments might make you cringe ("L is for Libido") and some might make you laugh ("F is for Fart"), but as a whole THE ABCS OF DEATH is an interesting movie. I imagine there's got to be something here that will appeal to most everyone. It can be an incredibly difficult task to sit through the entirety of this movie in one showing, but it's a fun one to throw on with a bunch of friends to laugh and gag at. If nothing else, people with a bizarre sense of humor who preferably grew up on Tex Avery cartoons need to watch "H is for Hydro-electric Diffusion". It's an absolute nightmare (made especially creepy by the makeup effects) but it's so bizarre that you can't not watch.

The ABC's of Death is a horror anthology in which 26 directors are given a letter of the alphabet, they have to come up with one word starting with that letter and are given creative freedom on how to incorporate that into their 'death' segment. Each short begins and ends with the colour red, the rest is a wild, weird and grotesque trip into some of the demented minds behind horror.

This film is a classic example of interesting idea, poor execution. The biggest problem with the film is how uneven it is. Giving total freedom to 26 different directors is a blessing and a curse. The curse aspects come from how weird some of these are and how lazy the others appear to be. Finishing the film I can only remember a handful of them and even less are ones that I enjoyed. I guess I'll break it down by letter:

A - an exercise in torture with a twist ending that doesn't really serve the story.

B - Here's one that is a lazy attempt at a horrific bedtime story that doesn't end well for the storyteller.

C - Groundhog day with death, a half realized idea.

D - Probably one of the better ones that people like. Well shot, good set ups and executions.

E - I forgot what this one was and had to look it up, which should tell you for forgettable it is.

F - This one had me scratching my head in hilarious confusion. I thought the Japanese were weird before, this one shines a new light on everything.

G - A POV take that bores you to death.

H - Another humorous and odd concoction of giant dogs and foxes during WWII.

I - One of many that leaves you confused about what the director intended.

J - Something Takishi Miike would probably make if he were to take part.

K - A cartoon about a piece of poop that kills a woman...funny? I don't know.

L - Another entry from the Japanese market, another uncomfortable sequence that makes you wonder what they are drinking over there.

M - Ti West's entry, the laziest one of the bunch that runs about 2 minutes.

N - A comedic entry about a bird that should keep his mouth shut.

O - Visually striking, lacking story.

P - Realism about prostitution and the lengths one will go for her family. Icky ending.

Q - A self parody about the filmmakers who are upset they were given the letter Q.

R - From the guy who brought you A Serbian Film...nuff said.

S - A tale about drugs, felt like an Australian entry.

T - Claymation about a poor kid who fears the toilet. I kinda liked it.

U - Second POV, only with a story and more involvement.

V - Seems the director wanted to showcase his skills as an action director more than wanting to have an entry in this anthology.

W - A youtube like entry that should have been given to someone else.

X - Great story, great gore, even if it is predictable, it is one of the better entries.

Y - Odd, weird, gross.

Z - the absolute strangest of the bunch, feels like Japanese parody porn.

So this film has more misses than hits. I can 't really recommend this because of the oddity of the entries being so weird and uneven. I would advise people to simply watch Masters of Horror if you want to watch some horror stories from masters of the genre.

Concept of the anthology: 26 letters in the alphabet, 26 shorts, and all must have at least one death and open and close with the color red. To say the anthology is a mixed bag is obvious. You have some good films here mixed with a lot of bad ones mixed with a whole lot of forgettable ones. "The ABCs of Death" just proves how incredibly hard it is to make a good short film, and I'm sad to say the bad far outweighs the good.

The first decent short does not come all the way until the letter L, which is almost halfway through the alphabet. It's not until you get to the second half of the letters where you finally begin to see some good shorts, my favorite being Q, directed by Adam Wingard. Other notable filmmakers involved include Ti West (M) and Nacho Vigalondo (A). Unfortunately, West's segment feels incredibly lazy and shot in five minutes while Vigalondo's segment rehashes the same apocalypse premise we've seen many times before. T is a notable segment because it was for a competition, and it's one of the best ones here. X is the most violent (and is also very good), which isn't surprising coming from French filmmaker Xavier Gens ("Frontier(s)").

Shorts F, J, and Z are all Japanese, which you think might be a good thing, but they are huge stinkers in the bunch, especially "F is for Fart." It's pretty much self-explanatory. Another one that I hated is W, appropriately titled "WTF!" O is the most visually breathtaking with uses of slow-mo and sound effects, but it's pretty much style over substance. But hey, compared to most of the shorts you see, it's a welcome change. G seems to be the most pointless one where all you see is a guy surfing. Seriously, I'm not joking. That's all there is.

I guess I was a bit mad watching this because, as an aspiring filmmaker, if someone were to give me $5000 to make a short, I would work very hard in creating something good. Seeing all the wasted effort from most of the filmmakers here just angered me. Overall, "The ABCs of Death," while a neat idea, is mostly just a collection of forgettable to incredibly bad shorts sprinkled with very few good ones.

The Good: L, N, P, Q, T, U, X // The Bad: E, F, G, H, J, M, W, Z // The Best: Q // The Worst: W // The Forgettable: All others not listed.

Honestly this movie had huge potential. But as with most anthologies like this, there are going to be a few bad bad ones. And trust me, this movie had its fair share of duds. However, some of the good ones were L, X, D, A, N, and R. The rest are either average or pathetic. (For example the letter F almost made me want to turn off the movie) If you're into horror I would give it a watch, but don't expect a masterpiece