Almighty Thor

I'm sorry this movie was horrible. From the beginning with the weird cgi of the huge army in battle, but any scenes with the soldiers only showed one or two fighting... Most of the time swinging their swords up in the air to the off camera demon dogs (or whatever)... To the constant walking of Loki once he got to Earth...what was that a total of 10+ minutes of him just strolling on the sidewalk and attempting to look menacing? The movie was so bad i got distracted by Thor's brother's weird Rocky looking lip... and Thor's bright white two front teeth? Are those bad caps or did he suck his thumb too long... Thor whined more than Luke Skywalker in the first Star Wars... I gave up with only 15 minutes left of the movie. Thor even had some "magical" earth jacket that would hide the hammer when he put it in his inside pocket...sometimes it went in handle first some times hammer end first...(Didn't Dungeons and Dragon's have some endless pocket or something like that?) Oh the "magical" jacket even had a place to hold his sword on his back and remained invisible until he pulled it out... :)

Btw, I actually registered on IMDb so i could post this review...That's how bad the movie was...

Wow… almighty I think not. I saw the ads playing on TV and it actually looked like it might be some harmless, no-brainer fun. Terrible, but fun. Well it was a no-brainer. As this limited made-for-TV Scy-fy feature (from The Global Asylum productions) was a lousy superhero knock-off with little in way of entertainment and even unintentional laughs in this role-playing venture. It reminded me of those Hercules / Xena TV episodes, but they were better. Other than Cody Deal's humorously awkward delivery of his lines and overall whiny attitude as Thor, this mockery was rather drab and repetitive. How many times do I have to watch Richard Grieco as the demonic god Loki wandering around the woods and streets. At least with that wandering, he did look badass in his get-up while also frowning a lot but at least there was a purpose for that constant wandering… in search of Odin's Hammer of Invincibility. So there's a lot of walking (bad guys), then running (good guys) and but also yelling. I don't know why… but yelling seems like the only way to get something across. Especially Thor. Constant arguments with Patricia Velasquez'z helpful character. But even when danger is around (dogs of hell and the CGI) or there's a chance to finish things off, people decide to stand around explaining things that just don't need explaining. Maybe it's because Thor is just so stupid, you just wish Locki would finish the job… "…Not quite!". When it comes to the jerky action, for most part it's done in awesome slow-motion to simply enhance the epic, if lumbering fight choreography. It's no effect, they are virtually fighting in slow motion. One move after another. While watch round after round as Thor gets beaten up by Locki. Every encounter is basically the same and Thor is too dumb to realise training would help. But no he must kill Loki… NOW! Quite awe-inspiring, just like the powerful dialogues with a message at heart. However where is else to you get to see Thor toting a machine gun… yep a machine gun… against a god… and he did have the hammer at his use. It figures, as its lack of imagination shows. Also showing up in a small part is Kevin Nash as Odin.

"I don't believe in fate."

It's almost like whoever wrote this doesn't know anything about Thor.

With Scifi(I refuse to type the other)pouring money in to garbage like this and canceling great shows they have destroyed the network and it started with wrestling, I don't see ever watching the channel again after the SGU finale.

I can't even watch more than 15 min of it and that was painful beyond words, then I thought it to be unfair to say the things like this without at least finishing it so i suffered... So if you want to feel like digging your eyes out with a spoon watch this. Character names were the only thing that had to do with Thor I really wish I could give it negative stars but 1 will have to do.

I caught this on Syfy, and I wish I could make them take it back. The plot centered around Loki trying to destroy the earth by killing Yggdrasill, the tree of life. I don't remember if either Thor or Loki mention it by name; I got the impression they couldn't pronounce actual Nordic terms if their paychecks depended on it. Not only this, but Loki keeps talking about Ragnarok, and it is obvious the writers had no idea what the term means. They would probably also call people in a blimp "the Rapture." Anywhoo, the whole plot requires Loki to steal Thor's hammer. Why this is difficult is never made clear, because Thor is a major beefcake meathead. He sounds like a surfer and spends most of the movie looking like he needs a diaper change. Some woman named Jarnsaxa spoon-feeds him every move, which is amazing because she is practically unintelligible--a fact made even more painful when they do vocal effects and her words could not be deciphered even by CIA software.

I won't spoil the ending, because the director and writer already did that. Suffice it to say that it involves a trip to Hell; not HEL, the Nordic afterlife and the goddess thereof, but basically the Christian Hell--fire, lava, the whole ball of melting wax.

Watch this if you need a good laugh; there isn't an ounce of real heroism or grandeur in the whole mess. My biggest disappointment was Richard Grieco, who can be an effective menace but here comes across as a street punk with a wand and a skin condition.

This movie was just hilariously awful. It seems like a 12 year old wrote the script. It tells the story of a young Thor coming of age and trying to avenge his father Odin (played by professional rassler Kevin Nash), who was smited by Loki (Richard Grieco). Seems Loki the evil trickster wants the famous hammer that would eventually become Thor's bread and butter weapon. Grieco walks around with evil written all over him including a powdery white face and black spikey armor.

Cody Deal is the dumbest Thor or for that matter any other super hero/god ever. He can't fight and even though Jarnsaxa (a warrior chick trained by The Valkyries played by Patricia Velasquez) tells him over and over that he can't fight, has no skills and can't beat Loki he just continually ignores her and says "I'm going to find Loki and kill him". Guess what?! Every time he finds Loki he gets his butt whipped handily. Still our thickheaded moron of a hero won't go train and says "I am going to find Loki and kill him!" This movie is beyond bad. I watched it on the Sci/Fi channel and it has all the makings of a Sci/Fi original film. The CGI is cheap and cartoony. The fights are shot like they shot one move, cut, then another move, cut and then another. BUT I will say this, if you like bad movies and like to laugh at how horrible and ridiculous they are then you will get something out of this. I laughed and was held to the screen by its awfulness!