Bite Marks

This was a fun and funny B-rate gem. Don't expect great acting, but there were some good campy moments and fans of B-rate will get a kick out of it. Plus the main characters were gay guys so that's a nice twist.

Okay so this is by no means an award winning feature... I'm not even sure if you could call it a B title but I rather enjoyed it for the most part.

YES, it is cheesy! YES, it is lacking a budget! YES, it is not a masterpiece!

But it is fun... David Alanson does a good job in his first feature role. And he's not bad on the eyes either. Windham Beacham, veteran of gay cinema, plays Alanson's lover and Benjamin Lutz in his second feature holds own as well.

What I found rather interesting was the appearance of Stephen Geoffreys whom I have not seen in a feature since the 80's. Geoffreys' had left main stream cinema for a career in the adult industry for many years, under the names Sam Ritter and Stephan Bordeaux, and believe it or not was quite good as a hunky well chiseled power bottom.

Is this something to run out in a panic to see? No... but it is worth a watch on Netflix or a rental on an otherwise boring night.

I gave it 6 out of 10.

When I sat down to watch the 2011 movie "Bite Marks", I was under the impression that it was a horror comedy.

Sure, I had never heard about the movie, prior to sitting down and watching it, so writer and director Mark Bessenger essentially had every chance to entertain and impress me with this movie. However, that was not the case.

I found the storyline and narrative to be too mundane. The movie was devoid of comedy, and the horror elements throughout the course of the 84 minutes that the movie ran for were light. So I have to say that "Bite Marks" didn't pack much of any bite, pardon the pun.

I wasn't familiar with the cast ensemble in the movie, but I would say that the acting performances were actually fair enough.

Visually, then "Bite Marks" was okay. It wasn't a movie that made use of an abundance of special effects though.

Ultiamtely a movie that failed to impress me, and definitely not a movie that I will return to watch a second time. Nor is it a movie that I would recommend for fans of the horror comedy genre.

My rating of "Bite Marks" lands on a generous three out of ten stars.

A bickering gay couple--Cary (Windham Beacham) and Vogel (David Alanson)--are backpacking across the country. They get tired and hitchhike and are picked up by hunky handsome trucker Brewster (Benjamin Lutz). He's transporting coffins (!!!) to a funeral home. However the truck breaks down near a deserted junkyard, night is falling and it seems the coffins in back have blood thirsty vampires...

It starts off OK. Lutz is a good actor and bares his butt briefly. Beacham and Alanson are OK too--and Alanson bares HIS butt. The basic plot is interesting but the film gets more convoluted as it goes on...and stupider. The comedy isn't that good either. If veers from OK to groan worthy and there are some gross out gags that I could have lived without. Still this is not horrible. Lutz and Alanson are VERY attractive, the vampire makeup is effective and there's a hilarious (and ACCURATE) conversation on vampires in films! I laughed out loud when Lutz says, "If you guys talk about "Twilight" I'm throwing you out!" So--all in all--just OK.

Truck-driver Brewster takes over his missing brother's delivery of a load of coffins to a funeral home. He picks up hitchhiking gay couple Cary and Vogel whose relationship is in trouble to help him stay awake but when his GPS leads them into a deserted junkyard, his truck breaks down, stranding them.

Stephen Geoffreys (known to you either as a child star in horror or an adult star in gay porn) makes an appearance. I suppose that gives this film some sort of reason to see it, but not much.

Really, if you want to see gay vampires, see "Vampire Boys". While this film is (believe it or not) better made, "Vampire Boys" is clearly intended more for the gay audience. This one tries to appeal to all with some topless girl... I will give them a point for referencing Cary Elwes, but then take that point away for ripping off the "Gremlins" theme song.

Oh, and if you are at all homophobic, this is not the film for you. There is a scene that should not be bothersome, but if guys loving guys makes you squeamish, you will hate it.