Il matrimonio che vorrei

The trailer and marketing campaign for this film is another instance of a collection of sound bites making a film seem like something that it is not. This is NOT a geriatric sex comedy. In fact, I would not even call it a comedy. There are some laughs, several smiles, but most of the time I was in tears. If you go there expecting laughs, you may be disappointed. I went there with such expectations, and I was pleasantly surprised and amazed.

I am about the same age as the couple, and I deal with divorcing couples every day. This film is so real and true-to-life, with no big fight or over-the-top scene, which is appropriate since so many marriages end as a result of a collection of little unintended cruelties becoming unbearable.

I cannot think of any film in which Tommy Lee Jones or Meryl Streep gave a more astonishing performance. Tommy Lee going to a couples therapy session run by Steve Carell? The perfect set-up for lots of laughs, but then we realize the situation is really not funny.

Imagine a film in which Steve Carell has absolutely no gags, routines or funny bits. Yet I can't imagine anyone doing that role better. He was in another film dealing (in part) with a relationship gone bad, "Crazy Stupid Love," which was a comic take (and a marvelous film). Trying to find another film for comparison, the closest that comes to mind is Bergman's "Scenes From A Marriage." But I think this film about the same general subject is much more accessible.

I would have given this film a 10, but the soundtrack of obvious songs to underscore the plot became somewhat distracting. The song most appropriate here (but not used) is "That's The Way I've Always Heard It Should Be." The couple here would be from the same generation as Carly Simon.

I'm going back.

The plot seemed simple enough, a marriage in trouble, but when you have Streep and Jones you expect a treat and the did not disappoint at all. The scenes where they are sitting with the the therapist you can cut the tension with a knife. You expect Streep to be brilliant and she is, but Jones more than hold his own. It is difficult to play a man who is unable to be vulnerable and he truly excelled.

Of course as with every cinematic experience depends on your state of mind and your demographic. The couple sitting in front of me were elderly and mid way through the movie the lady leaned over and put her head on her partner's shoulder and stayed like that through the rest of the movie. This movie does that to you, it makes you appreciate your partner more, you can almost thank them for putting up with our own shortcomings.

This is a real movie for real people ... Enjoy!

Hope Springs (2012)

*** (out of 4)

Charming comedy about a married couple (Meryl Streep, Tommy Lee Jones) who have been together for thirty-one years but the wife starts to think they're losing everything. She forces her husband to go to a marriage counselor (Steve Carell) and soon they realize that a lot more is wrong than they thought. If you're looking for some deep, hard hitting marriage drama then I highly recommend you check out Ingmar Bergman's SCENES FROM A MARRIAGE. If you're looking for some light entertainment that will make you laugh then HOPE SPRINGS is just the film for you. Yes, I understand you could argue that Streep and Jones are too talented to appear in such a simple comedy but I personally don't think it matters and especially since both of them are so enjoyable here. What really struck me is that the two really do come across as a real couple who have been together for over thirty-years. Both actors are clearly into their roles and this is especially true for Jones who easily steals the picture. He can play grumpy like no other person out there and he does a terrific job here. His replies to being pressured by the doctor have a certain comic timing, which I found downright hilarious at times. Carell is also very good as the man in the middle. He basically just has to sit there and ask questions but the actor made the role quite memorable. The film is far from perfect as there's no doubt that it starts to wear down in the final fifteen minutes or so but the two actors are simply so charming that it's still worth watching.

I am a single, 67 year old retiree, who has been married and divorced twice; and this movie really touched me. It acted as a sort of cinematic mirror to prompt me to reflect upon the many daily choices, or even finer gradations of volition, that make up a healthy or dysfunctional marriage or relationship of any kind. The movie was about how we create our own heaven or hell, in the house, in the kitchen, in the bedroom, and in life. We lose our grip on our passionate love affairs almost the way that dust slowly collects on the floor. Didn't I just vacuum that dust yesterday? That is how a marriage can ossify, degrade itself, as if consciousness itself were shot full of some sort of novocaine by sneaky subtle injections over the years, one feeling at a time numbed.

Meryl Streep, Tommy Lee Jones and Steve Carrell are excellent and break new emotional and acting ground for all three master actors.

The movie made me think about my entire life, and it made me reflect upon my parents' marriage, too.

Tommy Lee Jones' portrayal of Arnold, a man who has been an accountant so long he can simply function on automatic with his customers, not really giving his passionate self to his business- or his marriage, ran the gamut from acceptance of various ruts to various kinds of rage, embarrassment, and stubbornness, refusal to drop his pride, or make compromises that would have been in the best interests of himself, his wife and the marriage.

The camera does not editorialize. It shows Arnold falling asleep watching golf instruction on television. The camera directly above the frying pan and close up, depicts Meryl Streep's Kay, sizzling a strip of bacon and one sunny side up egg for Arnold every day, day after day. He eats his breakfast with his back to her as he reads the paper, then gets up, every day, and gives her a peck on the check without even making eye contact, and he's off to work again- like an unemotional little engine that could.

When Sisyphus pushed that boulder up to the top of the hill, his punishment by the gods, he had to watch it roll back down to the bottom of the hill whereupon, he repeated this process - for eternity. But Sisyphus smiled - at least according to Albert Camus, he smiled. It occurred to me that relationships and marriages devolve into accommodations, and that passion, like air being spent out the tiny leaks in a worn tire, can evanesce before either party truly, deeply realizes what they are doing, what they have done. The smiles in this movie are forced, automatic, defensive, painful. Boulders are not openly acknowledged.

In this movie, every scene is slightly underplayed. No line or gesture is over the top. Almost every word of dialogue is realistic. I never felt that I was being lectured or preached to. I did think that the background music was too intrusive several times, however, almost as if someone did not trust Meryl Streep to carry the emotional load of the scene - an error of judgement. This movie needed no such authorial or directorial intrusion - That is my only criticism.

"Hope Springs" is a movie about the ingredients of happiness or lack of same, and the finesse of the actors, the director, the cinematographer and the editors is magnificent. They never stooped to dwell on any sort of cliché dialogue or acting flourishes. It was believable.

I felt that the movie really opened up my life. I wish I had seen it 45 years ago when I married for the first time. It is that good.

He shows well here, since his roles have traditionally called for one expression, one attitude, one way to deliver lines--but here, he reaches in and shows his talent. As a CPA in Omaha and husband who is really not a husband anymore, TLJ gives a great performance.

But, let's talk about Meryl Streep. Aside from pure talent and acting ability, there's an intangible that this woman has that allows her to fill a screen in a way that few have ever done...you just cannot take your eyes off her. She has not always played women that you love, but you certainly will fall head-over-heels for her character in this flick. Yes...she dazzled us in so many movies (think of her portrayal of Julia Child), but her performance of this sweet-as-sugar but unhappy wife is a work of pure art. See this movie for these performances. Awesome.

The movie overall was quite good, and Steve Carrell was a wonderful presence. Two issues: it was NOT a comedy, and should not be presented as such. The script could have used a few more funny lines; but, what REALLY bugged me was the soundtrack: while it was not always awful, there were a few times where the background songs were dreadfully intrusive. Why did the director think he had to punctuate the on-screen feelings of the protagonists with pop music that echoed their emotions? Geez...we GET it (and the songs aren't even that good).

Finally, if you're under 50, think hard before you see this...it's not meant for you.