The Son

I'll address the first thing that I see on the negative reviews: Zen McGrath as Nicholas does not "sell" it. I thought the same thing as I was watching the movie, he never brought me in, he was hard to read, he had a smirk that threw me off, a little smile that was hard to decipher, he seemed sarcastic and out of it, I never felt his pain... but after days of thinking about this film this is what I realized:

Teenage kids are hard to read.

That is the whole point.

I am a parent of a 15 year old boy and this movie shook me to my core. It really did. The parents couldn't read the boy (much like I feel most of the time), they went with what they saw from him and trusted that gut feeling vs what professionals were telling them, they trusted the memories they had as though those represented who the boy was now, they trusted their own desire for things to normalize, they trusted the good moments, they went with the unmistakable desire that "things will be ok". They let those desires take the wheel.

This is Hugh Jackman's best performance to date as a parent desperate for things to be ok as he dealt with his own issues of being a son himself, he wanted to avoid being a monster... not realizing that being a friend wasn't the solution.

X.

My 17 year old done committed suicide 3 years ago. The storyline matches my experience almost exactly. Although I'm hard working, not all hard working fathers are from wealthy backgrounds or high powered jobs. Suicide can happen to any family. The exasperation depicted by the parents was spot on. Hugh Jackman's character tried kind dad, understanding dad, hard dad etc. As I did (with help from parental counselling). I saw bad reviews of the sons acting. Totally disagree - he said little, went for long walks, avoided school in exactly the same way my son did and he totally looked the part. The story was very well researched. The doctors line "sometimes love is not enough" said much. The son pleading to leave hospital was him pleading to die. The happiness in the moments before suicide was the happiness of escaping pain. I've seen it. Mental health remains so poorly understood, and it likely always will. But the signs of suicide I've since learnt can follow a pattern. The film captures it all. Top marks for having the courage to make this film and for sure it's not for everyone. Finally, I saw a review saying Jackman's character was failing badly as a father. I've talked now to many people whose family had experienced suicide. And all did their best. I'd stick up for all of them.

Just a bit of research into the works of writer, playwright, director Florian Zeller gave me the information that the he has made a trilogy namely " The mother" ( stage play) a decade back and two movies " The father " and " The son" recently. While I have not seen the play, I found "The father" an excellent movie embellished with the outstanding performance of Sir Anthony Hopkins for which he got the much deserved Oscar award. This movie too is first rate ( but not without its flaws) and has some good acting of Hugh Jackman and Laura Dern with a bonus of a cameo of Anthony Hopkins as the grandfather. Some critics and reviewers have said unkind words about this movie since they found it too bleak and schmaltzy and have also criticized the acting. Not fair really because the subject demanded sentimentality, poignancy and pensiveness. The main characters are the father ( Hugh), the ex wife ( Laura Dern), their 17 year old son ( Zen McGrath) and the present wife ( Venessa Kirby). The son is traumatized by his parent's divorce, he is in acute depression and moves in to live with the father but he is not able to stabilise causing misery to all. He blames his father for divorcing his mom.

Director Florian builds up a charged atmosphere with some heart wrenching scenes as the parents try to get the son to normalise and fit in the family. Those familiar with or knowledgeable on mental health issues may find fault with some points of the narrative specially the apparent inaction by the parents on a few obvious red flags. While most scenes are moving, some may find them cringe worthy and off putting. Actingwise Hugh has put up a good performance showing a father's remorse and guilt. Laura is good as usual and on familiar turf as the distraught mother, a role she has done earlier. Teenager Zen has done well considering his age and experience. I thought he projected the pain, confusion, distress and bitterness very well. There is a beautifully crafted and enacted scene between Hugh and Anthony Hopkins as father and son. The background music enhances the dramatic effect.

The Son is every parent's nightmare. Reminiscent of Birth in the way the uncanny permeates every frame and implants a creeping sense of foreboding under your skin. Vanessa Kirby as Beth is the most relatable character, as she seems as confused by Nicholas as the audience. Hugh Jackman nails it as the father trying to do the right thing and slowly realising that there are some things that are just beyond our control. Zen McGrath is naturalistic as Nicholas, allowing the actions to speak for themselves and calibrating perfectly a performance it would be easy to over-egg. There is something stagey about the production, a nod to the play origins, and done deliberately one feels, as it adds to the sense of unreal events overtaking characters. My favourite moment was when the parents leave the hospital having made one decision, only for the next cut to show they reversed it. A harrowing film that will hopefully start important conversations for some people.

When I began this movie, I really had no idea where the story was going to go. I just saw that it was a Hugh Jackman film and wanted to see it. He's always been one of my favorite actors. This story is very personal to me because not only have I too dealt with mental illness for a long time now, but I have also lost several loved ones to suicide. My heart felt like it was being ripped from my chest. Watching this story also made me question how I have dealt with my own children at times. Now, they are all adults but one of my sons deals with depression and anxiety and there were some years during his adolescence that I really worried if he would try to hurt himself. I encourage everyone who watches this film, to hugged your children tight, constantly tell them you love them, and pay attention to them. It is so easy to get involved in life and miss little clues that are right there. But truthfully, just as it is performed in this movie, our love can prevent us from seeing the truth because we don't want to believe it. This was a very touching movie.