London Zombies

I've grown quite allergic to the terms zombie-comedy, and especially to the allegedly cool slang name "zomedy", because we horror fanatics are literally overloaded with movies about the Living Dead that are supposed to be horrific and hilarious at the same time. In reality, however, the vast majority of them are just downright dull, uninspired and irritating. Ever since the British cult hit "Shaun of the Dead", it seems like every (young?) aspiring film director assumes that he/she can make a horror comedy even though these two remain the hardest genres to put into a blender together. Therefore I was rather skeptical when I went to see "Cockneys vs. Zombies" at a local horror festival here in Belgium. The idea sounded good, the trailer looked mighty fine and the cast features a handful of names that even make the most mediocre movie tolerable (Alan Ford from "Snatch" and Honor "Pussy Galore" Blackman) but still … it remained a zomedy! It took me more or less five minutes to put all my skepticism aside, though, because the movie starts out amazingly and I immediately got sucked in. The intro sequence and particularly the awesomely animated opening credits, guided by the magnificent song "What's that coming over the hill is it a monster?" by The Automatic, set the basis for an exhilarating, fast-paced and blood-spurting horror adventure. Admittedly the script features many clichés, stereotypes and redundant melodramatic moments, but overall seen is director Matthias Hoene's approach fresh and inventive. In Cockney country, the heart of working class East London, construction workers are building a gigantic apartment complex for which several traditional monuments have to be demolished, including the old folk's home of Granddad Ray Maguire and his friends. His offspring plans to rob a bank so that he doesn't have to move away from the area, but something else also interferes with the construction works… a zombie invasion! When the workers stumble upon ancient catacombs underneath the city, the region is quickly overrun by thousand of zombies. The bank robbers battle their way back to the retirement home as fast as they can, but the old timer prove themselves still tough enough to stand up against the undead. "Cockneys vs. Zombies" (don't you just love it when the title is, in fact, the entire plot?) is a straightforward and largely unpretentious zombie romp that delivers what you expect (or hope for). There are various flaws, like for example the screenplay refuses to sacrifice any real pivot characters and overdoes the melodrama a bit near the climax, but these are widely compensated through ingenious little plot aspects and the excessive gore effects. Certain sequences already qualify as instant classic in my book. For example, you haven't seen a zombie chase until you witness the race between a pensioner with a walking frame and a traditionally slow-sauntering rotting corpse. Or, how to kill a zombie with a metal plate in his head? And then for the obvious biggest trump of the film I'd like to refer to the title. The genuine Cockney characters and the delicious rhyming slang dialogs are the elements that truly distinguish the film from the others. Alan Ford must be the coolest Cockney since Sid Vicious and, as expected, he steals the show in every sequence he's in.

You've seen 'Shaun of the Dead' and most likely almost every other zombie spoof as well if you're now looking up this zombie comedy. Well, I'll tell you that you're havin a bath if you spend more than a film on this, not that I condone half-inching dvds either! It's good, it has so many laugh out loud scenes and hilarious dialogue, and then it has Michelle Ryan, who I quite like.

So, Terry and Andy are two brothers planning to rob a bank, with the aid of cousin Katy, nice but dim friend Davey Tuppence and local nutter Mental Mickey, all because the council is allowing the demolition of their granddad's retirement home. When the job goes bad, they're spared being shot by the police, when a sudden zombie outbreak lays waste to London's East End.

Banded together with the bank robbing gang and the hostages they've taken, Terry and Andy must find a way to rescue granddad, with the £2 million they stole in tow. That's it in a nutshell and the rest comes down to the silly fun they have taking the gypsy's kiss out of every cockney stereotype in existence.

What really sells it for me is Alan Ford as granddad Ray and his fellow retirees defending the nursing home from the undead. Foul mouthed cockney pensioner gangsters are always a bit of a laugh, but when he's backed up by Honor Blackman and Richard Briers, you're up for levels of ridiculousness you never thought you'd witness, and it's worth it.

The special effects ain't half bad, I've seen many worse attempts taking themselves way more serious, and I've seen comedies with less laughs. Give it a go, by all means!

COCKNEYS VS ZOMBIES is one of those films that's perfectly encapsulated by a "what it says on the tin" type title. A bunch of Cockney no-gooders find themselves caught up in a zombie epidemic, and the rest of the film plays out exactly how you'd expect, whether you've seen the trailer or not.

Despite the predictability, though, and let's make it clear - COCKNEYS VS ZOMBIES breaks no new ground whatsoever - this proves to be an entertaining movie, with solid production values, a game cast and fast pacing. Yes, the script is as dunderheaded and profane as you'd expect, and the young characters are stereotypically dull (aside from eye candy Michelle Ryan), but where the film really has fun is with the old-age cast members.

The scene stealer is without a doubt Alan Ford, delivering another of his delightfully sweary turns a la SNATCH, and proving himself an able fighter when it comes to tackling the undead menace. There are strong turns, too, from Honor Blackman, Tony Selby, Dudley Sutton, Georgina Hale and the late Richard Briers, for whom the film provides a fitting epitaph. The scene with Briers and a zimmer frame, heavily featured in the trailers, is an undoubted highlight.

Along with the old-timers, we're treated to all manner of zombie carnage, with plenty of gory effects and violent mayhem en route. The zombie scenes outdo those in B-movie fare such as FLIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD and APOCALYPSE OF THE DEAD, while the comedy makes this preferable to the overrated SHAUN OF THE DEAD. No classic, perhaps, but certainly a lot of fun.

A fun filled zombie film. Definitely not one of the best, but highly enjoyable. Loved the dialog and all the actor character portrayals. The gore effects had highs and lows, meaning there were some gore effects that were crazy good and other gore effects that were most likely rushed or they didn't put too much thought into. Alan Ford had me in stitches, he did an awesome job, I guarantee you will like him a lot in this film. Rasmus Hardiker and Harry Treadaway who play the central characters were both entertaining, and I wouldn't mind if the two reprise their roles in a sequel. Lastly I wanna speak about the lovely Michelle Ryan (who plays Katey, the cousin), I sorta fell in love with her in this film and loved her fiery attitude as she helped kick some zombie butt. In closing, I really try my best not to give away any of a particular film, because we usually already know what a film is about, and the only thing that comes next is to watch the film. In my opinion spoilers suck and it takes away from what others may enjoy or dislike about a particular film, that's why I rather that others come to their own conclusion upon viewing a film for themselves. Cockney vs Zombies...I loved it!...and I hope other fans of the genre get to see it and come to love it as well.

I guess that's the best described movie title since Snakes on a plane. The movie delivers fully on its title and that's all you can expect from it, isn't it? A year ago Frightfest audiences were treated to a glimpse of some footage from the film. August 2012 the same audience (or whoever came again) got to see the whole film. And I'd say it played pretty well with most people.

I liked it too. The humor is good, you get Cockney language thrown in a couple of times and one the slowest chases you'll see in any film. And it works really good tension-wise. Mr. Ford of course is a delight to watch and he must have had a lot of fun on the set. You can't and shouldn't take a movie like that serious. Otherwise you'd have trouble enjoying this