Fake Identity

Val Kilmer, looking nice and swank, heavier... but I still miss the old days when he played roles like the Saint. Then, we saw a much sharper, expressive, and exciting Kilmer. In this movie, Kilmer plays a doctor who becomes mistaken for a secret agent/diamond dealer, with the usual nefarious consequences. The story does try to keep you interested till the very end, but I felt Kilmer was a bit of a letdown.

The movie takes place in Bulgaria, not Chechenya, and from there, moves to Prague. Most of the supporting actors seem to be slavic, but they all acted well. I could find no fault there. The girl, Katrine (Izabella Miko) is beautiful and acted well too.

The main plot is not about saving anyone mysterious, nor protecting her from assailants. The girl is a secret double agent, working both for a British group seeking to control a diamond cartel, and the Bulgarian/Czech people who also want control of the same. The girl bumps into Kilmer, while running from being captured taking pictures for the Brits, kiss to make believe it was intentional to shake them off, and that begins a love affair, so strong, both were willing to risk their lives for the other. Whether or not you believe this is highly improbable depends on your definition of the word, but that is the plot, in a nutshell.

This is not to say that the movie is just a frivolous jamboree of hastily made-up story lines. No, it was OK, considering the story is nothing new, and similar plots have been used many times before. It would be a mistake to compare this movie with older ones of similar ideas, such as 007 Diamonds Are Forever. Such movies were a tour de force. It would be an injustice to make such comparisons, so the best thing to do, I guess, is just to take this one as a standalone, and judge it by its own merit. Doing so, it is not a shining accomplishment, but neither does it fail miserably.

So, bottom line: "will I like it?" If you like this kind of plot, it will keep you interested, but you'll have to follow the story carefully to avoid becoming confused. I know I did until I started doing some facial recognition. Despite the blasé storyline, it's not a bad waste of time.

The plot is silly, one hurried kiss and the two main characters have fallen so deeply in love they will risk their lives for each other.

The acting is OK, Kilmer plays an over-weight doctor well, you can really believe he is struggling gamely to run and out of breath! The rest of the cast are OK.

The story is a mess, none of it makes sense.

The dialogue is poor.

The ending is almost comical it is so ridiculous.

This isn't a good film but if you can switch your brain off you can watch it.

The older Val Kilmer gets the worst he is.

Fatty, heavy, clumsy and without any ability to show any emotion. He looks like a stoned junkie.

The story itself is below average.

Double, triple, quadruple agents are messing with each other without any sign of consistency.

Boring characters, boring storyline, no acting, predictable outcome.

Everything is there to make you feel cheated.

The main disappointment is Kilmer. I think he is drinking too much. His face is puffy, he moves like a tired elephant.

Don't waste your time...

Well, folks, here's the thing... Nu Image is all about business. Invest "X" amount of money, get "X x 2". That's why you get the results this studio is showing recently. For a couple of millions you can NOT get a Hollywood star, neither you can get a real Hollywood set or decent script that can make the story interesting. Same goes for the FX effects and all the stuns. At the end you have "X" amount of DVD market sells, that breaks the bill for Nu Image and some profit. But, you get Val Kilmer, Wesley Snipes, Jean Clode or Steven Segal. Most of the time… By the way, all of them have a hell of a time in Bulgaria, because the clubs, drinks, food and specially the girls are cheap, and they come in great quantities and varieties. For an average US viewer this movie will be a mess of unsubstantiated facts, story lines and unjust mix of languages that make no sense. But hey, who gives a damn in that type of a B-movie weather the cars are from the age, the cell phones are current or anything in the story make any sense or not. Once you get Nu Image release all you want is some action, stuns, gun fight, FX and naked pretty girls. You don't get every time all of the above in enough quality and quantity, but life is unfair anyways....

For all Bulgarian viewers, the movie was a bouquet of ALL Bulgarian movie stars gathered together in funny roles. Even the tight budget by US movie standards, is more than enough to pay all those Bulgarian actors plenty. Show your self for 30 seconds, don't say a word, get a thousand bucks or more. In Bulgaria that's a bargain. Izabella Miko is a charm, too bad she does not get naked here. Val Kilmer is kind of drugged or drunk (from all that night life he got in Sofia maybe) All the Bulgarians are fine – the do their job professionally. Almost no FX what so ever, no dissent stuns. Couple of good scenery shots in Sofia. Extremely stupid and lame story.

That's it folks

Probably one of the lamest movies I have sat through in recent memory and only exhaustion kept me from finding something else. Val Kilmer has gotten so heavy I worried about him stroking out while trying to run through the woods in an early scene. Then when I realized the movie made no effort at real athletic stunts, I quit worrying. The so-called passion between the 2 stars was the most imaginary part of the whole movie. It was so imaginary, in fact, it was nonexistent. The plot was so convoluted that for awhile I was tricked into believing it was complex. By the end I realized it was just confused. The only reason I am wasting my time writing this review, is to keep you from wasting your time watching this movie. You have been warned.