The President Is Coming

When we were kids, we played a popular game called 'Simon says'. In this game, one kid from the group became 'Simon' and issued instructions to the rest of the group, like 'Simon says sit' or 'Simon says jump'. The person who failed to perform the action immediately lost the game and sat out until the winner was declared. The six contestants who compete in a reality show that offers the winner a chance of the lifetime to shake hands with President George Bush (now former President, of course) are so hare-brained and crotchety they'd all fail in first round of a Simon Says game, forget making the list of NDTV's top entrepreneurs (as the film states. The only way this can be justifiable is if NDTV is equally harebrained) or worse, representing India to greet a President. It isn't just the contestant choice that's ridiculous but the selection committee itself which includes two unhinged women who conduct a series of absurd tasks in elimination rounds. It's really a stretch to believe that the US consulate would these circus freaks to work for them, who seem fitter as inmates of a mental asylum. The only reality shows that fits the bill for these cartoons is the garish 'Timeout with Imam', the Indian 'reality show' (though it's obviously scripted) that's currently polluting MTV India. For those unfamiliar with the show, think Spencer Pratt & Heidi Montag.

Actor-director Kunaal Roy Kapoor's satirical mockumentary is too incredulous to work as a satire or mockumentary, and edges on farce with non-stop tomfoolery. The characters in 'The President is Coming' are so in-your-face obnoxious and in-each-other's faces offensive that they put you off so much, you'd wish that carnivorous plant from Cadbury Bournville commercial would devour them up. These aren't likable caricatures, like Sheldon Cooper in Big Bang Theory or Meryl Streep's wonderful Camilla Bowner in 'Web Therapy', whose verbal darts during their repartees are sharp but don't hurt. In 'The President is Coming', the characters want to draw blood every time they open their mouths. At one point, a guy asks a girl 'Are you a sl*t?... A wh*re?' (later, it is found that the girl had recorded a sex-tape with another male contestant in the past) like he's asking about weather. Even the wicked Barney Stinson from comedy series How I Met Your Mother would've been more tactful.

There are seven contenders fighting for the title of 'The Most offensive character' in the film. Let's begin with the host Samantha Patel, a bossy uptight always-Miss-Right anchor who dons Barkha Dutt's bob cut. There's hardly a moment where we don't see her putting down her timid protégé Ritu Johnson and telling her who has the last word. She's later found to be a kleptomaniac stealing cutlery and statues from the location of the reality show. It's surprising that this character, who wants to remain in the spotlight always, doesn't ask the reality-show's camera-man (who's off-screen, holding the camera, through which we view all the action) for close-ups, or come too close to the camera only to block others from view.

The six contestants include Maya Roy, an author who loves the works of Ernest Hemingway, except she thinks she's better. A strong-minded forward-thinking divorcée, she is irked by the misogynistic, homophobic, antediluvian thinking of co-contestant Ajay Karlekar, a Hindutva social worker who believes he and George Bush share the same qualities (he's got that right, at least). She is also very shrewd, using contestants' weaknesses to get them eliminated. One victim is South Indian Ramesh S., a closeted homosexual who is learns all the rules of straight-flirtation but never gets them right. Then there is billionaire's daughter and budding entrepreneur Archana, a scatterbrained brown skin Paris Hilton without the puppies, and Rohit Seth, an accent trainer running the unimaginatively named 'Speak easy'; this is the couple that was involved in the sex tape scandal. The guy who asks her whether she's a sl*t is Kapil Dev Dholakia, a stockbroker who can speak stocks and shares very easily but nothing else. When asked what the capital of US is, he replies 'Dow Jones'. The film gives this painful guy a sweet revenge by dressing him up as Madonna in the Round 'American Masquerade'.

You just can't choose some who calls Osama Bin Laden as Sri Sri Ravi Shankar as one of the top six contestants of any quiz based reality show, especially one where the winner meets Mr. Bush. One just can't be so ignorant, so offensive and so ludicrous unless paid handsomely by the TV to act this way. There's also some obvious blunders for which no explanations are provided. Firstly, where's the entire crew that's shooting the event? Are we to believe one that there's only person shooting AND operating the boom mic (a device to capture sound. Oftentimes makes special appearance in films due to careless editing) and there's no security except one mousy watchman? And why would one character reveal a maleficent hidden agenda in front of TV cams and security cams? All these annoyances and blunders rob the spotlight from moments of mild delight.

Ernest Hemingway once said 'The most essential gift for a good writer is a built-in, shock-proof sh*t detector. This is the writer's radar and all great writers have had it'. Anuvab Pal may not even make it to the long list of such writers. His film reeks.

I saw President at its NYC opening at SAIFF. I found it both pleasantly entertaining and original. As a non-Indian I may have missed some of the specific Indian humor contained in a few scenes but all in all I found myself laughing pretty consistently throughout the film. If you're looking for a film with great characters, witty dialogue, and a slick editing I highly recommend it. The other thing that stood out to me was the caliber of acting and the great on screen chemistry between the characters. At its core the film pokes fun at both India and the U.S. and the strange relationship that exists between these two great countries.

I saw this film in New York City for the South Asian Festival. How wonderful to see the first of it's kind and an Indian mockumentary. The film was good fun - the audience loved it and laughed the whole way through. The actors were all very strong - and the script was fast paced and very theatrical.

Always a pleasure to watch Konkona Sen Sharma strutting her stuff. Anand Tiwari is absolutely hysterical - he's one to watch out for.

The cast work very well together as a whole - and the animated sequences are a real treat - that make you think that you are watching some sort of reality TV show - that people get voted out of.

I think this film will do very well in India and abroad!!!!

I trembled while resisting the worst possible rating for this film but in all fairness I've seen worse. At least the promos were creatively misleading and since it's important to actually sit through the ENTIRE film before laying claim to a comprehensive review, I admit I threw up and walked out on this one within the first hour. Let's take it up one by one:

The Acting: is at best shoddy and reminiscent of a self-congratulatory, Mumbai-based English-theatre performance. For those who don't know what this means, it's the equivalent of Timothy Dalton playing Bond or Arnie playing a mother. (Maybe I'm cribbing because I've seen some of these performers botch a perfectly good script on the Mumbai stage as well). The characters are so cocooned in caricaturisation that they you can't connect with them any more than you would with Puff-the-magic-dragon.

The Direction: is amateur and unimaginative. Sorry KRK but the reality- TV style is losing its sheen unless you bring something to it. Those forced silences and awkward moments just don't work if you're not going to bring an element of the panopticon to it.

The Production: Cut, cut, cut. I read someone say this film is slick but in my opinion you could trip on the gaps between cuts. I could hear myself grind my teeth between bad performances because for some reason the producer wanted me to notice they were BAD.

It pains me to write this because I actually knew KRK back in college and loved his stage performances and steady supply of off-stage wit but I'm thoroughly disappointed at the hack job that's been put together with "The President is Coming". Let this be a lesson to all foreign dignitaries to steer clear of this country just so we don't have to be subjected to another one of these abominations.

The story idea was decent. But the movie was bad, very disappointing. I felt the director didn't do a good job because the screenplay was lacking. There were a couple of good scenes that made me laugh. But most of the jokes were contrived.

You can't get away from criticism by calling it a documentary (i.e. low budget). It needs to be compared to a commercial movie. My test is simple - Was it an entertaining movie? After sitting through the whole movie - the answer is No. I felt cheated because the movie could have been better than the final product that was presented.

Konkona Sen Sharma was a waste. I decided to watch the movie as I saw her name in the titles.