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Alicia Lagano, Jon Polito, Natalie Denise Sperl, David Figlioli, and Chad Michael Collins in Rock Monster (2008)

Citazioni

Rock Monster

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  • Jason: Let her go, Dimitar. This is between you and me.
  • Dimitar: [pointing to the rock monster] No - this is between you... and him.
  • Jason: Let Cassandra go and you can do whatever you want to me.
  • Dimitar: Tempting, Jason, but you're not my type.
  • Toni: If I have to listen to Warren bitch about his kidneys being jostled by the bus or his feet swelling up from walking or his allergies acting up from the trees, I am going to hurt him - badly!
  • Jason: Have you ever taken a deep, dark look at yourself, your hostility towards the opposite sex? Are you sure you're not into... girls?
  • Toni: Oh, you wish.
  • [Warren cuts himself on a rusty sword]
  • Jason: How bad is it?
  • Warren: It bloody hurts! I'm going to get lockjaw, aren't I?
  • Toni: Pah! We can only hope.
  • [Jason glares at her]
  • Toni: What? I just think it would be a nice reprieve from his constant prattling.
  • Dimitar: My people are simple and superstitious, but they are loyal once you get to know them.
  • Jason: I'm not sure I want to!
  • [silent villagers menacingly approach the young Americans]
  • Toni: Ahh, pod people - ten o'clock.
  • Toni: Forgive them. They're monosyllabic on a good day, but on others - nothing.
  • [the boys admire the lovely Cassandra]
  • Benny: Dude - she's a ten!
  • Warren: Eleven.
  • Jason: *Twelve.*
  • Toni: Congratulations, boys, you can count.
  • Cassandra: Are you all Americans? I love America! I've seen every American movie since 1984. I read every American newspaper and magazine I can find.
  • Jason: Wow, that's great! I'm an American and so are my friends - except for Warren. He's British.
  • Warren: It's not my fault.
  • [on The Colonel's basement arsenal]
  • Toni: Eclectic... post-Soviet Martha Stewart crossed with supply sergeant.
  • Jason: I need a weapon.
  • The Colonel: You have one.
  • Jason: But you don't expect me to fight with this, do you?
  • The Colonel: You have a sword. You learn how to use it.
  • Jason: It's just a sword!
  • The Colonel: No, it is not just a sword. That sword killed the monster once and it can do it again. Study it. Learn how it works and we will all be saved. Now hurry!
  • Jason: I'm nobody's hero, Cassandra. This is not my destiny. I'm just a college student. I go to Cal Poly. I've been going there for seven years; I've had ten majors. I only came to this place to claim a free house.
  • Jason: Hey, Benny, what was your major, anyway?
  • Benny: Quantum physics - string theory.
  • Jason: [to himself] String theory? Benny? More like G-string theory.
  • [Benny has accidentally shot a squirrel]
  • Benny: I just killed Rocky.
  • Dimitar: Earth, wind, fire and water may all come apart, but the rock will crush them all.
  • The Colonel: Dimitar has warned that the creature will come back and kill every living song in Ivanova until he has the sword... and you are dead.
  • Jason: He's really starting to get on my nerves.
  • Dimitar: At dawn the sun shall shine through the sword and connect me and the creature in a bond of pure energy. The creature's spirit - the spirit of the omnipotent wizard Allas - shall be transferred to me and I shall become the most powerful man that has ever walked the earth... and I shall walk the earth for a thousand years!
  • Jason: Sounds like a party... I'll bring the beer.
  • Cassandra: You're despicable.
  • Mayor: I'm practical.
  • Farm Boy: [holding a wedding ring] Be my wife... Well?
  • [Toni and the Farm Boy kiss passionately]
  • Toni: Let's just live in sin.
  • Dimitar: I'll kill you!
  • [Jason rams his sword through Dimitar's chest]
  • Jason: You first.

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