Dogging: A Love Story

When I sat down to watch the 2009 British movie "Dogging: A Love Story" I was under the assumption that I was in for a comedy movie. Granted, I hadn't even heard about the movie prior to 2021, as I had the chance to sit down to watch it.

Well, I made it half way through, then I simply gave up on the movie out of sheer and pure boredom. This movie was unfathomably slow paced and unappealing. Amazing that writers Brock Norman Brock and Michael Groom could collectively manage to come up with a story about absolutely nothing.

And not even the characters in the story had any appeal. They were just milling about with every bit lack of appeal as the movie. I can honestly say that I don't even remember the name of any of the characters. And it didn't help much that they had the appeal of wet cardboard. I am sure that the actors and actresses were doing good enough jobs, but they virtually had nothing to work with here.

As for this being a comedy, well then it sure was a swing and a miss from director Simon Ellis. I didn't even laugh once, nor did I even manage to get a smile from what transpired on the screen.

This is not a movie that I will be returning to watch the rest of, as I simply just have absolutely no interest in the storyline or the characters. And it is not a movie that I would recommend you waste your time, money or effort on.

My rating of Simon Ellis's 2009 movie "Dogging: A Love Story" lands on a mere two out of ten stars, based mostly on the fact that it seemed that some effort was actually put into the movie.

Add an original story concept about something seldom talked about publicly, include lively, interesting actors, then conclude the story by by using every cliché available.

Sadly, this could have been far better than it turns out. It's definitely not the fault of anybody but the writer or whoever had final say on how the film ended.

The actors, camera people, post-production, sound crew, basically everyone but the writer, do everything possible to keep the film enjoyable despite the script. Hopefully, it was more of a studio/producer issue forcing a plain, boring, predictable, tedious, uncreative, pre-packaged ending on it because the plot and first hour really did show promise.

Dogging is as British as Earl Grey tea and frozen football pitches on windy January afternoon, and it is definitely an interesting subject in which to base a film upon. In case you are wondering, Wikipedia defines the sexual act of 'dogging' as;"engaging in sexual act/s in a semi-public place (typically a secluded car park in a car) and then watching others doing so." This sexual act (or acts) is the pretext for the loose romantic plot behind Simon Ellis's first feature-film in which four people's lives and relationships revolve around the act of dogging.

Dan (Luke Treadaway) is an aspiring, unemployed journalist who is hoping to set the media world alight by writing an article on the act of dogging and what people attain from the activity. Being unemployed, he sleeps on his best friend's Rob's (Richard Riddell) couch. Rob is a man's man, his job as an estate agent is only worthwhile to him as it allows him to meet and exploit plenty of mature, divorced women looking for a new abode. The film's core storyline revolves around Dan's deteriorating relationship with his girlfriend of four years Tanya (Sammy Dobson) and the unlikely relationship he strikes up with Laura (Kate Heppell), a young, curious and naive new member of the local dogging community. Continually the characters motives change within the film and we are given no indication or explanation why this happens, constantly keeping the audience at arm's-length rather than drawing them further into the characters lives.

Ellis's film, to be fair, does have its fair few moments of cheap humour, which almost entirely occur while the characters are involved on an excursion to a local car-park. Dan's first adventure out within the world of the 'doggers' will certainly bring forth a few chuckles. But its main setback is that the central theme of relationships is incredibly shallow and only barely scraps the surface of what would have made for an interesting story. The combination of using both first (Dan) and third person perspectives (unknown owner of a night-vision camera who's identity is later revealed) in the film also seems to be somewhat redundant and adds nothing but a few extra minutes to the running-time of the film.

'Dogging: A Love Story' had an interesting, and experimental premise that potentially could have made for very fun and engaging film, however it falls flat with a thin story and one-dimensional characters.

What a shame - this could actually have made for quite a funny template for a film if only they hadn't opted for the banal and puerile. "Dan" (Luke Treadaway) is an out of work journalist who decides to write a piece about the practice of dogging. Now if you don't know - that's when you drive to some remote spot and have sex with folks peering in the window, or taking photos - or even filming it. "Dan" is also a bit sexually frustrated, a fact not helped by his flatmate "Rob" (Richard Riddell) who fancies himself as a bit of a Lothario. It's whilst chatting on the internet that "Dan" encounters "Horny Geordie Lass" (Kate Heppell) and after the bravado dies down, they both decide they kind of like each other and decide to meet. Do they keep up the pretence of the dogging (neither of them are really into it) or do they try something a bit more grown up? Well to be honest, and much as I like Luke T, I just didn't care. It's smutty and crass - but worse than that, it has no plot. There is no story nor do the characters have anything to say. Once we've seen a few steamed up windscreens - there is actually very little actual sex, here - then you've seen them all. There's a glimmer of talent from Michael Socha's chavvy "Jim" who has a better than average chat-up line - though not so successful on the top deck of a bus, but otherwise this is really a waste of everyone's time both behind the camera and on the sofa. Maybe next time don't go for the easy "Carry On" option because this just isn't funny.

STAR RATING: ***** Saturday Night **** Friday Night *** Friday Morning ** Sunday Night * Monday Morning

So we have another Brit com aimed at the more laddish end of the British movie going population, this time exploring the phenomenon of 'dogging', where (in case you didn't know) people have sex in cars inviting others to watch. Truly an issue that needed addressing in amongst all the other important stuff going on in the world...it just needed the right film to address it, surely? Sadly, Simon Ellis's film just isn't it, an overlong, granily shot, largely plot less and rarely funny comedy drama that despite it's original touches (the cocksure chav with a heart of gold, the nice at heart girl who uses dogging sites to escape the clutches of her over protective father and the loss of her mother, the arrogant best mate who's really pathetic and vulnerable underneath) and despite not being as deplorable as the likes of Sex Lives of the Potato Men, still fails to really leave much of an impression at all. Since his 'acting' career hasn't been up to much since Basic Instink-t 2, why didn't they get ol' Stan Collymore involved for some more expert opinion? *