La battaglia del pianeta perduto

Super low-budget sci-fi film looks as cheap at the original "Evil Dead," but lacks the inventiveness of that film (although comparisons to Sam Raimi for inventiveness is probably not all that fair). A starship pilot returns to earth to find it under alien control. Don't expect any futuristic cities or big sets. This is a bunch of dudes in the forest fighting aliens in bad make-up. I did enjoy the spaceship special effects for the space sequences, the but earthbound scenes are pretty weak. Still, as badly written, directed (by Brett Piper), and acted by it's cast of no-name actors, the film has a charm to it and it does have an exuberant fun feel of a bunch of friends who got together to make a goofy movie. Taken on that level, you might enjoy this piece of bad cinema, but don't go into this film expecting anything actually good (not even at "Hell Comes to Frogtown" levels of competent filmmaking).

Harry Trent (Matt Mitler) steals a spaceship. While he is in outer space, he witnesses the conquering of the earth by a giant fleet of aliens who have a certain resemblance with warthogs and also grunt a lot. Because his ship is damaged, Trent needs 5 years before he can land on earth. Almost everything was destroyed by the invaders, but Trent is greeted by the survivors as a hero, because it is said he owns the weapon to fight the aliens. He has no idea what they are talking about, though? Science fiction trash with ridiculous special effects. You wouldn't believe my description if you haven't actually watched it... It's Trent's sarcasm and the obvious self-irony of its makers that makes the movie easy to sit through. Be prepared for something silly, and if you are in the right mood, "Galaxy Destroyer" might become a small gem in your trash collection.

Currently floating around as "Battle for the Planet" on Freeview streamer Tubi this is a Z-grade gem. Horrible effects, possibly the worst creature to ever grace a non-creature feature, schlock and enough double entendres to sink a battleship. And those are the highlights.

But it's fun, doesn't take itself seriously and there's enough mid-80s hair and fashion that you just can't put it out of its misery by turning it off. Grab a beer, some mates and some weed, and enjoy. This is a film from the world before social media, review aggregators and decent CGI.

Just laugh at it - it's all the movie wants from you.

The basic idea of the film isn't that bad, after all, not every film has to be a cinematic masterpiece with a completely new plot. Especially starting with time in space is a nice idea. But everything that plays on earth has failed. Nothing about the plot seems remotely believable (even given the experience of the coronavirus pandemic and how many people have dealt with the apparent disaster, this film remains incredible). The plot is simple, naive, without any finesse. The characters are stereotypical, without any inner development. Even for the mid-1980s, the tricks are pathetic and the mask is a horror. Anyone who came up with the idea of no longer using surnames a few years after the catastrophe, of calling a middle-aged man only "Old Man" and inventing a name like "Prof. Isaac Hoffenstein" really has no ideas of their own, only copied from the cliché book for end-time movies.

This no-budget genre rollercoaster starts out as a futuristic heist movie, then turns into a space opera, then becomes an isolated man survival story and finally resolves into a post apocalyptic road movie. And there's stop motion aliens.

Wow.

The first half was a tough watch.. it feels like a student film that they are taking way too seriously and yet simultaneously don't realize it's not as funny as they think it is. Only the Hero character seems to have ANY acting experience.

In the second half they seem to finally find the tone of their 'so bad it's good' movie and we get incredible dialogue such as: 'prison... it's not the character building experience they advertise' and my favorite: 'Oscar Wilde... for a fag he had some good ideas.'

Along the way we meet a Zach Galafianakis style stoner woodsman and a Tom Savini biker lookalike.

Recommended for only fans of creative film making with NO budget, ala Miami Connection or Dark Star.