Dead Meat

I read in the IMDb horror board a post that was like this: Andre the butcher is stupid! Its like a US version of Sadomaster! its that stupid!. That comment inspired me to comment on this movie.

I watched Andre The Butcher a year ago so i don't remember all the details, but i do remember that it was fun to watch, like Sadomaster. And yes, this movie is as stupid as Sadomaster, and i like them both. But Andre The Butcher is a better movie, its not only fun like Sadomaster, this one is a decent low budget movie (Sadomaster is just a funny no budget video).

If you want to watch a real horror movie, stay away from this. This is a gory comedy, just like Troma movies are. Ron Jeremy is a serial killer that punish sinners and dismember cheerleaders. There is a very good amount of blood and gore and lesbian sex. Cant fail. 7/10

Andre the Butcher is about a satanic demon that took the place of a family man butcher who lost his family and takes up performing his profession on everyone that stops by. A ridicules film whose saving grace is that it is supposed to be demented, and that it is. Cheerleaders, convicts, and cops all get in on the act and fall prey to the butcher. Ron Jeremy plays the butcher in a way only he can. Of course with Jeremy, you would also expect to find gratuitous nudity. Luckily, it's the cheerleaders and not Jeremy. If you like mindless demented films with little redeeming qualities, this is for you. At some point during the film you will snicker and walk away shaking your head. Perhaps you can make it to the ending. And would someone please, please, kill that darn half a sheriff that keeps popping up on the screen. I bet he's even in the sequel.

I hated this when I first saw it, but then I thought about it more and realized it wasn't quite as bad as I thought originally. Still not very good though. It had its moments, like the cheerleader kung-fu. The obvious body double shots of boobs was just plain ridiculous. The only thing this movie has going is its silly humor. Most of it didn't work for me, but I can see where some people may appreciate it. I was pretty disappointed that this was not a super gritty creepfest like the box art implies. The tone of the movie is nowhere near as cool as the cover. Then again, these movies usually aren't. I should probably get used to that kind of disappointment.

The film caught my eye at Blockbuster this past weekend. Being a huge horror/slasher film, I was lured in by the great box art and the blurbs on the cover by so-called horror critics declaring this film "the best low budget horror flick in years." PLEASE!!! I really question how many films these people have actually seen OR how much money the producers of this flick paid them to say these positive things! Believe me folks...this film is A-W-F-U-L!! If you are truly a horror fan, you have probably seen the 80's slasher flick "The Last Slumber Party." This film is absolutely horrendous.....well..."Andre the Butcher" comes pretty close to beating that flick in terms of awfulness.

The plot is absurd and centers around a trio of cheerleaders who stumble across the house of a supposed serial killer, apparently called "Andre the Butcher" (I say apparently because absolutely ZERO background is given to the killer or his motives). The house, despite being the residence of an apparent cannabilistic serial killer, is actually quite cozy and tidy. Nothing at all scary about it at all....it could be your grandmother's house, for crying out loud! At least make the house creepy to add suspense!! The stupidity int he fact that the cheerleaders simply go into the house and basically start living there (they were suppose to be looking for a phone to call for help) adds to the stupidity of the plot. Secondly, the acting is atrocious from EVERYONE involved....the cheerleaders are terrible and are quite out of shape and homely. The lighting and direction are strictly amateurish in every sense of the word. There are shifts in the picture color and contrast throughout the entire film. Ron Jeremy makes for a terrible killer and an obvious body double is used for him almost the entire film--it's obvious because the body double is twice the size of Jeremy and wears a silly looking black curly wig.

I understand this is suppose to be more comedy than horror, but tell me what is funny AT ALL about this mess? And why try to appeal to horror/gore hounds with the box art when the gore and murders in the film are all very mild and fake looking? And if you can even make it through the opening scene of this film, which is absolutely laughable terrible, you deserve some sort of prize.

This is seriously the worst attempt at a horror film I have seen in at least 15 years. Rent if you dare, but don't say I didn't warn you! 0 out of 10.

Every once in a while a surprisingly good movie surfaces. And lately it's low budget movies that manage to come up with something unique and entertaining. This movie is one such gem. No A-list actors, which is always a good thing unless in your world, RJ is an A-list actor. That does not mean that the acting is bad. All the main actors do an outstanding job, if you appreciate subdued acting. This is not hyperhysterical sceaming dialogue that goes as good acting these days. Granted that some of the secondary actors aren't all that great- I'm thinking about some of the cops. The actors here succeed in portraying their characters, young community college kids, horny, hungry, funny. The script is outstanding. First of all, there is a script, unlike most movies these days that give you fancy effects and no dialogue. The script is fresh, funny, witty, unique. What starts out as a mundane story line of stranded cheerleaders in the middle of nowhere turns out to have plenty of surprises in store. The special effects are good and quite gory at times. The girls are pretty and there is a seriously erotic scene here, something you'll never see in your megaplex. In fact, there are a couple of scenes that only independent filmmakers have the guts to create and there are a few of those here. I like that this movie is filmed on location in Florida and not in some Hollywood backlot or in LA. This is an outstanding effort by a group of people who seem to like movies and know how to make a good production with a limited budget. I hope to see more from them. Andre the Butcher II would be something to look forward to. You won't be disappointed with this movie if you like your movies light, entertaining, fun, and sexy. For sure this is a better horror movie than 95% of the junk that ends up in theaters and is marketed as horror these days.