Blood of the Chupacabras

When I first started watching it, the production values didn't exactly throw me. I mean not all good movies have large budgets, but the story of this movie starts off okay and justs starts to degenerate into some weird mix of a number of different ideas. The movie might have been salvaged if only it settled for one of them.

Interesting concept, bad execution. If you're looking for a horrible movie for any reason this is you best bet. Otherwise... run!

I am sorry but this movie made me laugh. It was so stupid, it actually made me laugh! The acting was so bad, it was funny. My mom and I rented this film because we saw the video case and thought it looked good and scary. We should have known better.

Everyone in this movie was so ugly! It was a movie of ugly people except for the one waitress girl who was somewhat decent. The gypsy's hair changed. In one scene, it was white, in the next it was brown, and in the next it was white again. Oops, someone forgot their wig! And then that hilarious music in the news room with all the ugly people! LOL! And also, no one can forget that man in the sheep nightie and the barn boots. Wow, somebody has issues. And then at the beginning when it showed all of the farm animals and u can tell that people were making the noises! Also, there were so many people in this film, after a while, they all looked the same ~ UGLY! If you want a funny/stupid movie, this is a must. However, if u want something scary, STAY AWAY! A good scary movie is Dead End, rent it and like it. It was excellent!

There are certain events in life that, no matter how ready you think you are, you can never truly be prepared for. "Bloodthirst: Legend of the Chupacabras" was one of these events. Let me begin this review by saying that I love s****y movies. I LOVE them. Look at IMDB's list of worst horror movies ever. Scroll all the way to the bottom. I have seen at least half of these movies. "Final Stab"? Seen it. "Lost Voyage"? Seen it. "Sasquatch", starring washed up Roy Schneider wannabe Lance Henrickson? Seen it. While these movies were horrible, especially "Lost Voyage", which could only be described as "thumb in the eye horrible", none of them could have adequately prepared me for the cinematic abortion that was "Bloodthirst: Legend of the Chupacabras."

Let's start with the pros, shall we? Okay first of all, the cover art was designed by someone with at least a basic working knowledge of Adobe Photoshop.

That was fun. Now onto the negatives. The budget of this film, every single cent of it, undoubtedly went towards the Photoshop software used to create the cover art. I suppose my biggest beef with this film was the complete and utter lack of chupacabras/chupacabra-related deaths. Now, when I see a movie called "Bloodthirst: Legend of the Chupacabras", I have certain expectations. These expectations do not involve 5 random Mexicans walking around for two hours while nothing in particular happens. Naturally, I was quite disappointed when only one person was chupacabra'd, a scant 15 minutes into the film. While the "hastily opened soda can" sound effect did a lot to enhance the juggulating, I was still left sorely disappointed. Especially when the movie dragged on for an additional 2 hours. In which nothing happened. At all. And then the credits rolled. Credits! Do you understand what that means? It means that people- human beings- were involved in the creation of this atrocity. Sometimes I think about what my life would be like if I hadn't seen this movie, and for just a brief, fleeting second, I am happy. And then the world of reality comes crashing down on my head like a trainwreck. This movie ruined my life.

In conclusion, I've added a list of better ways to spend 2 hours/3 dollars:

-Stick thumb deep, deep into eye.

-Make better movie about chupacabras involving, and here's the twist- actual chupacabras!

-Engage in awkward, sweaty, groping session with British pop star Phil Collins

-Track down and brutally murder anyone involved in the creation of "Bloodthirst: Legend of the Chupacabras"

-Kill 200 bag ladies

-Drink yourself into a coma and die happily, knowing you'll never have to witness this heinous crime against humanity

-See "Lost Voyage." I'm not even joking.

This movie stinks. I could shoot a better movie with a group of friends, a portable video camera, fake blood, and no script. It is a waste of money to rent and a waste of time to watch. Paint peeling is more interesting. Not only are the actors unknown but they are bad at what they do. I couldn't finish watching it. I wanted to turn it off 3 minutes into the film but thought the monster would be awesome. Well, it wasn't so I turned the DVD off. The monster doesn't look anything like what is pictured on the cover. In fact it looks like a guy in a green scuba suit. The Halloween costumes at Party City are of better make and quality. How it got onto a stores shelves let alone manufactured I will never know.

A homemade, shot on video movie about a group of treasure seekers falling foul of the deadly and legendary chupacabra. There's no shortage of enthusiasm, but this is pretty dire stuff, with very wooden acting from the non-performers and occasional scenes of the characters being assailed by a lifesize CGI creature which are utterly laughable.