The Real Cancun

MTV is the epitome of narcissistic superficial artificial slack-jawed mentality that has changed the direction in the youth of American culture for the worse. And the film is quite possibly the nadir of said stupidity. In it a group of young blank twenty-somethings slither their war through spring break in Cancun sharing a beach house (a la "Real World). How these rocket scientists can share a house when they don't even share a braincell among them is a mystery for the ages. One of them is a sober geek who never drank so much of the "reality" movie is based on getting him wasted. All of this is accompanied by mostly flavor of the week crappy music that again is like MTV. Horrible.

My Grade: F

Go to the Zoo instead and watch monkeys for 90 minutes. Much more entertaining, more intelligent interactions, a lot more fun! John Lennon and Yoko Ono once made this short film about a house fly wandering around on naked bodies... an Oscar contender compared to this schmutz. Unbelievable what someone somewhere (guzzling himself into some alcohol-poisoning stupor)thought would make a cool flick. Freedom of expression not withstanding, this should be found unlawful, crimes against humanity or something of that nature, and the maker of this indescribable crap should be forced to watch his own movie until death has mercy on him. I hope that all participants will be recognized and properly laughed at for a long long time just for willingly being caught on film in what must be the darkest hour of their existence so far. If you're about to see this flick, run, don't walk, as fast as you can, away from this manifestation of terminal boredom.

This movie (and I use the term loosely) is utterly pointless. Instead of an entertaining romp, the filmmakers have given us the longest parental advisory of all time. I am sure the families of these kids are pretty darn embarrassed (especially the parents of the twins Brittany and Roxanne ... I wouldn't be surprised if their folks took them out of college and forced them into a convent.) The situations are contrived and don't even seem real (guy comes to spring break in his glasses and never having touched alcohol and does one shot, and blammy! He's a man for the ages.) There is a young women named Sky who is very dull and only gives long "what are you talking about?" looks while we endure the most boring flirtation of all time. There are the cookie-cutter blonde girls whom you can't even tell apart who only seem interested in sex and wear cheap eye shadow (and one of them actually says, "I thought you were different.") The guys are supposed to be studly, but are just wretched (one of them clearly tweezes and shapes his eyebrows) and don't get me started on the guy who is an aspiring model; he comes across as one of the most disgusting of them all. Instead of being light-hearted, this is a depressing movie to be avoided at all costs.

Appalling.

It provides its own reward for the cast, who will no doubt buy copies to show their grandkids. I hope they're proud; I'm sure their parents are. The poor specimens of today's youth that it portrays, foul mouthed and ignorant, are regrettably typical of the lower end of the IQ pool, but what's worse is that it fails even in its promise of a T&A movie.

Let's be honest about this; it's like Big Brother. The only reason to get this out is to look at naked young bodies; after all, you can always turn the sound down and fast forward through the talkie bits. Why would anybody want to hear what these cretins have to say? And if even the T&A turns out to be non-existent, why bother making it?

One of the worst movies ever made, and all who had a part in it should be ashamed.

This movie reminded me of how bad society is. Do yourself a favor and avoid this film at all costs, unless you like seeing a formulated MTV train wreck. This movie is proof that media conglomerates honestly think were all stupid mindless drones.

Thank god I live in Canada and dont have to "deal" with MTV.