The Calcium Kid

The Calcium Kid is very funny in the tradition of "Young Frankenstein" and Monty Python stuff. Orlando Bloom shows that he can do more then play the swashbuckler. The humor ranges from subtle to absurd. The screenplay was just a little shy of pure genius. Sometimes it's nice to see a film that is just for fun. The actors have a chance to have fun and make fun of themselves. Orlando Bloom plays a wonderful part as our hapless hero. The supporting cast is great. The direction was hilarious. Pay attention though, you might miss some very funny stuff!! I give it 8/10 for the quality of work throughout the production. I literally laughed out loud several times. It's worth watching at least once, but I'll bet you'll want to see it again.

I've read all the terrible reviews; I wasn't expecting much, especially since I'm unlikely to get any British humor (being in the US and growing up in Asia). But the movie really surprised me at how many times it made me laugh out loud.

The performances are great fun to watch. Yes, the characters are cliché and very 1-D, but they are played with enough enthusiasm and charm to make up for the 'weak' script. There are places where the movie falls on the 'wrong/bad' side of cringe-worthy, like some scenes with Herbie(the manager) and Stan (the best friend), but overall, it's an enjoyable way to spend two hours.

And then, there's Jimmy (Orlando Bloom's character), who with his naivete and haplessness, manages to 'preach' without ever sounding preachy or cheesy. I know this is no Oscar movie, but it isn't as mindless as some comedies out there. At its heart, spoken through Jimmy's dad's quotes, are some good really messages. It's almost a shame that the movie isn't cut for a younger audience. It'd be a good diversion from the usual 'teen queen' movies flooding the cinemas these days.

So far, this is my vote for the Feel Good Movie of the Year. It the whimsical story about an amateur (record: 0-0-0) boxer, played by Orlando Bloom, going up against the World Champion, played by Micheal Pena.

The movie is shot in a pseudo-documentary style, so you really get to know the characters personally. There are quite a few laugh out loud parts, and the story goes along pretty well. The filmmakers used some standard movie "cliches" and stock characters, but they used them quite effectively.

Orlando's character, The Calcium Kid, is very endearing. You just want to hug him and pinch his cheeks through the whole movie! xoxo The cast meshed really well.

Even if you don't like boxing, you'll love this movie. Boxing is just the subtheme for a cute British comedy with a few real feel good moments.

**** for me!

No wonder this movie never got a world wide release. It's a simple made little movie that tries to be original in several different ways but fails at it in about every way possible.

This movie is supposed to be a fake documentary, a so called mockumentary, that focuses on the build up to a title-boxing match, set in London, between the champion Jose Mendez (Michael Pena) and the underdog and milkman Jimmy 'The Calcium Kid' Connelly. It makes you wonder that if this is supposed to be a fake documentary, than why isn't it made in documentary style. It uses movie camera positions, lighting and editing, complete with cuts and different positions and a chronological scene build up. Basically the only way they tried to make it look a bit like a documentary, is by adding a 'camera' voice-over and they let the camera being attacked and talked into a couple of times. It's really lame and it certainly doesn't add to the credibility or realism of the movie. The movie as a whole is hard to take serious since it goes comically so over-the-top that it isn't even good as a funny one. The humor is lame and simple, the sort of stuff a 9-year would normally come up with.

The movie is made in 'new-English style'. The kind of style which Guy Ritchie first began to use in his movies. Fast editing, fast pace, a cool style and music, over-the-top character and lots of humor. This is probably the only reason why this movie still remains a perfectly watchable one. It however does not always work out perfect. The characters for instance are all far from likable and/or comical. The humor itself on its own is also quite simple and awkward. This movie is far from funny or clever.

The movie is filled with surprising many good and well known actors, for such a small movie as this one. The material and dialog they have to work with however isn't world class and the barely manage to make certain sequences and situations to still work out. Most of the actors also feel out of place. Orlando Bloom certainly isn't in his element as normal and simple everyday person. He just isn't the greatest comical talent around, which shows in this movie.

Reading the premise of this movie, a inexperienced underdog against the boxing champion, one could immediately scream; "Rocky" ripoff! It certainly is true that this movie is far from original and the fact that the movie literally also spoofs some moments and entire sequences, completely with the same music, from the Rocky movies doesn't help to make this movie an original one that you can take serious as a boxing movie, not even as a comical meant to be one. In the end the movie still tries to take a surprising and non-formulaic twist but the twist is far from good, interesting or funny for that mater. As a matter of fact it gives the movie a bad aftertaste.

A failed movie on many accounts. Still somewhat watchable thanks to its style.

5/10

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My sister managed to track down a Region 1 copy of "The Calcium Kid" for me on DVD.

I thought it was a good little movie. It turned out to be MUCH better than I thought it would be; I figured it'd be a comedy and some good laughs, but it had some serious quality to it too, which was deftly executed by the writers, director, and the actors. Anyone who says Bloom isn't a good or even competent actor needs to watch this film, honestly; he lands on the scale talent-wise down below Johnny Depp, admittedly, but he's still as good or better than a lot of "stars" I see on the big screen. (Give me an actor any day of the week over a star, has always been my motto.

I've always in the past liked actors hardly anyone knew.) The story is pretty simple (proving yet again, as I beat my head on my keyboard trying to come up with a good book idea, the best stories have the least bullshit to them). Jimmy Connelly is a milk deliveryman with a dairy. This guy loves milk not just in his job, but in his real life, and has imbibed so much over the course of his life that his bones are hard as granite.

For exercise, Jimmy likes to spar in the boxing ring and answers an ad at a neighborhood gym to help English middleweight hopeful Pete Wright train for his upcoming match with Mexican-American middleweight world champ Jose Mendez in London. Wright breaks the bones in his hand on Jimmy's head and Pete's manager, Herbie Bush, is forced to find someone to step into the ring in only 7 days for the heavily-televised match. He picks Jimmy, who has no sports career, and the press quickly picks up on the new kid in the "David and Goliath" vein of storytelling.

Without giving too much away, I'll just say Jimmy encounters obstacles along the way, both humorous and poignantly sad. He starts the movie as a wide-eyed, cheerfully simple fellow and ends it pretty much the same way, but does grow as a character. There are several points where Bloom's expressive facial features - eyes, mouth, eyebrows - tell a lot more than even what Jimmy is saying, and it seems he takes direction very well from whomever is behind the camera. Jimmy's no brain trust, but when push comes to shove, he's smarter than he looks, at least in common sense.

The movie is filmed "mockumentary" style - the "director" is setting out to document Pete Wright's training a week before the match, as well as his daily life and background, but switches to Jimmy's story once he steps into Pete's place. The use of cutaway shots and still frames is a bit odd at first, but you get used to them, and it works; ditto with the soundtrack choices.

There were several supporting characters I liked a lot, in addition to Jimmy. His manager, Herbie Bush (forgive me, I don't have all the actors' names in front of me as I write, so I'm going to refer to the character names), is a guy looking to make a buck any way he can, and usually comes off as strictly an opportunist lout. He's not really a bad guy, though - he thinks fast on his feet and talks too much, but his schemes just don't usually work out the way he envisions.

Probably the characters I'll remember the most, though, are the crazy neighbor girl, Margaret, and Jimmy's pal Stan. Margaret reminds me of those celebrity stalkers you read about, who just adores Jimmy. She is not, however, the woman you want to see him with at the end of the day. Stan is a comfortably slovenly overweight fellow who sticks by Jimmy when things go bad, and ends up helping him train in odd ways. Another character I liked was Paddy, Jimmy's trainer, who keeps calling him the wrong name, LOL. ("You mad old Irish bastard! My name's NOT Johnny! It's Jimmy!")

All in all, I will definitely watch it again. I get excited by good storytelling, as a writer, because it inspires me in small ways.