H20 - Bagno di sangue

This is by no means a good horror movie other than sitting around to make fun of it. My friends and I have entire bad horror movie marathons, just to get a kick out of how bad they really are. We watched this Wednesday evening and laughed and laughed. It's not so terrible it's unwatchable, but watch it if you love good "bad" horror movies. It's akin to the 70's movie "Frogs" for the modern age and is still as crappy. Still, it's watchable, unless you're a homophobe and are too insecure to handle shots of male chests and legs and the occasional butt shot. Most people rate it badly because of this, but since I am secure with my heterosexualness, I don't need to judge it solely on the fact that it seems to have gay undertones. (even though there's no gay couples what so ever)

Yes, I knew what I was getting into when I rented LEECHES! Yes, I know what kind of films Dave makes for Rapid Heart. Yes, I knew there would be non-stop guys-in-speedo scenes. And yes, I even knew this movie would be flawed.

So why did I see it?

Simple, I was on a swimteam back in the day and I thought: "What an interesting concept!"

Of course, all of the other thoughts in my head kept telling me "Stay away...stay away. You know what this is gonna turn out to be!" But I say to hell with it and rented it anyway.

All of what I thought did come true. Too many speedo shots, boring and obviously mechanical "leeches" and an ending so rushed and so dull I think I could have slapped one of the leeches on my and let it suck out my blood. Just to numb the pain of seeing this film.

Still, the fact of a swimteam taking on a "hord" of killer leeches was fun, funny and out of the norm!

Oh well...I am a sucker of b-movies and will be until my dying day. If they keep making them. I'll keep watching them.

5 out of 10

The movie was bad. But the guys playing in it made it possible to for me to see it until the end. I really don’t know what kind of budget they had for this movie, I am sure it wasn’t that much, but the director did a good job. The shots seemed weird but they served their purpose: not to see the hands! When you see the movie you will understand what I mean with the “hands”! For the money they must have had, I really thought they did a pretty good job although some sounds, like the heartbeat when the leeches came, made me want to break the TV screen! The positive of this movie was the director who had some interesting findings to make his movie work. On the other hand the movie didn’t work that well in the end! But I found it pretty interesting watching and learning how the director worked with what he had in every scene and made it possible for this movie to come out. Really don’t expect much, it’s not that good. For those who love low budget movies you will love this one. It is one of the worst and it is an honor I think for a horror movie to be one of the bottom. First the octopus in “Bride Of The Monster”, now the leeches in “Leeches!”. The actors had to do what Lugosi had done then!! Sorry for not saying more you will have to see it!

This movie is not worth seeing. The special effects are worthless. The movie doesn't even make sense from the very beginning. The first giant leech to attack crawls in a guy's mouth when he slips in the gym shower room and is knocked out. In fact, the leeches almost always wait until they get to a person's face before they bite. It's so dumb.

There is nothing of value no matter what your gender or sexual orientation. The director obviously thinks guys are more interesting to watch. The guys are always scanned up and down by the camera and almost always topless.

There's nothing added to the movie to make up for the lack of special effects, sanity and imagination. If you're going to make a B thriller movie, at least make it interesting.

Okay, the "leeches" are rubber leech gloves on someone's hands. The swim team is a collection of non-acting, nondescript, male models who can't afford shirts. The females are utterly useless. The "story" seems thrown together at the last minute, and the filming itself has a closed in, tunnel vision look, like we're zeroed in on 10% of what's going on, while missing 90% of the picture.

Is LEECHES the worst movie ever made? No, there are equally dismal pieces of cinematic dross out there.

So, while this movie might be extremely painful, it won't cause agonizing death. Director David DeCoteau has his target audience, and perhaps this hits that mark. Otherwise, it's sub-sludge in its most pungent form...