Charlie

I have spent a lot of time in Camberwell and know the Richardson stories that have been around for years, but Malcom Needs lost the plot with this so called pic of the Richardsons. Charlie Richardson must have cringed if he saw how he was portrayed in this dreadful movie. Luke Goss isn't a bad actor as it happens but was miscast here although it will do him no harm, most of the ensemble were good but the script was so bad I was thankful for the pop tunes slipped in like an episode of Heartbeat. The South African thing veered off course continuously and the scrapyard looked more like it was run by Frasier, with a shiny new engine block hanging from above. Sorry but I would only rate this movie 2/10

This had all the makings of a classic Brit flick crime classic . The Richardsons were an infamous gang from South London who had had a reputation for torturing people via pulling their teeth out with pliers and sticking electrodes to sensitive parts of the body . Violently fierce rivals to the Krays they never really stayed in the public consciousness . The Krays were violent flamboyant homosexuals and the Richardsons weren't . This film tries to change all that

Steven Berkoff played Charlie Richardson in a previous film MCVICAR though he had a name change . The Richardsons also appeared in the 1990 biopic THE KRAYS though strangely again they had a name change to the Pelhams . You might remember the scenes they featured in because Berkoff minced around so blatantly he was camper than a row of pink tents . You can't help wondering if Berkoff done this on purpose because he was upset that a couple of pretty boy pop stars the Kemps got star billing and so decided to totally ruin the film by his performance . Considering CHARLIE stars Luke Goss one half of that bloody dreadful manufactured i5 minutes of famers undertalented pop group Bros one wonders what sort of hysterical acting atrocity Berkoff will unleash upon the suffering audience ? Believe it or not Berkoff is the least worst thing about the film

Watching Luke Goss play a violent London gangster is like watching Paterson Joseph play Adolph Hitler in DER UNTERGANG . He has all the menace of a poodle with distemper . In his defence he's not helped by the director Malcolm Needs who's so incompetent the name Special Needs would be more suitable . This alternative universe vision of England seems to be populated by parodies of " cor blimey guv " cockneys or posh people who all speak like Claude Rains in THE INVISIBLE MAN . They're all invariable camp too . Imagine a bunch of Anglican carol singers beating the living daylights out of one another while whispering the F and C words and you just begin to get the flavour of this movie and its graphic scenes of gangland violence . When you've got Mad Frankie Fraser portrayed by someone who thinks he's playing Edmund in the original series of THE BLACK ADDER something has gone wrong somewhere

Words rarely fail me . Adjectives have not yet been invented to describe this Brit crime flick . It features Leslie Grantham in a small role and one wonders if he dressed up as Captain Hook and got a little bit naughty over the internet with a tabloid journalist was to deflect attention that he appeared in this film . Let this be a warning to the rest of the human species - you misbehave , you commit murder , maiming and mutilation , you commit crimes against humanity then Malcolm Special Needs will be making a biopic on you starring next years winner of THE X FACTOR . You have been warned

Okay, I grew up in Bethnal Green East London and I have to say that nobody and I mean nobody sounds like that! Goss did a good job, really with what he had around him he did okay, but South Africa? What was going on? Literally you can pick the scenes that are shot there it's like they are another colour or something? Have you been to East London? It's grey, very dark and gloomy and that's in July. In this movie the sun is shining every day, it's blinding, you can feel it. Seriously guys it could have been great, really, maybe SA is cheap or something but come on, keep it real please! Nice effort I'm sure you guys all worked hard but come on you can do better than that right?

I first picked up Charlie Richardsons book ' My Manor' a few years ago, and, as the review by 'Punch' said, its a fantastic read. Its extremely witty, hard hitting and sensitive at the same time with an excellent perspective on how stupidly rigid society can be. It provided an excellent insight into his life - all in all propelling me and my girlfirend to drive miles to the first cinema that cropped up in the paper that had its sneak preview.

A wasted journey? Nearly. The film contained none of Charlie's wicked sense of humour, satire and dark wit. It was structured by different characters standing up in court to speak out against Charlie, with snapshots of his life/adventures in between. Good idea in theory but it just didnt work. Luke Goss [ a good actor in my opinion] looked like a Michael Fabricant fresh from a holiday scorcher in Gran Canaria with that daft haircut and perma-tan. His shirts were even worse. No favours done.

What really dampened its attempt at portraying a genuine South London snapshot of 60's gangland was the accents of the actors. Dick Van Dyke's chimney sweep would have been mortified to hear the 'cockney' accents, which sounded more like your average citizen from Sydney, Australia. They were just trying far too hard.

There were a few flashes of quality, for example the scene where train robber to be Charlie Wilson arrives at the scrap yard to pepper their office with shotgun pellets. Charlie and his brother Eddie are in hysterics [ and i mean laughing not crying] in the office, and hide Wilson from the police who arrive at the scrap yard after hearing the racket.

See it if you must, but i recommend the book. Save the petrol.

Luke goss shows his worth as charly Richardson the notorious south London gangster who even the krays gave a wide birth so already youve got an intriguing plot with mad frank in the mix, what can go wrong? Well its not bad! It has potential to be alot better but no spoilers its worth a watch.. yet you want a Richardson film watch gangster no1 although lossley based it's a cut above the rest.