Hell Asylum

Hey, I've got an idea. Let's put five luscious babes in a haunted house and pay the one who lasts $1 million. Oh, we won't waste any time having then undress or anything like that, and we'll include a sex scene that is off camera. It'll be a reality show hit - I guarantee it.

So, we bring in the girls and lock one in the closet, and pour bugs on another, and then the ghosts who inhabit the house will rip them up and we have blood and bones all over the place. They still don't show us anything, and all they basically do is whine and scream.

If you are going to rip off another movie, at least show us something original. Not even scary.

A friend bought this film as part of a collection of ten horror films for ten dollars. I was recently at their house and had the terrible misfortune to view it.

Hell Asylum is a hideous, hideous film with a blatantly ripped-off storyline from House on Haunted Hill.

Five beautiful stereotypes -the skank, the girl next door, the goth, the wannabe star, and the all attitude black chick- are sent to a haunted house as part of a reality TV show, and meet several not scary ghouls. The cloaked monsters provide no thrills, and the ending will have you either laughing or sleeping.

This film is bad. So bad it seems as if a film student made it just to pass film school (they wouldn't have passed) on a budget of $500. (Including actors' salaries.)

The awful, horrendous acting would be more suited in a Porn film and the 'gore' in Hell Asylum consists of 'intestines' which resemble spaghetti.

If only the Mystery Science Theater 3000 guys were still around to serve it the justice it deserves.

Watch out for the TV producer who bears a strange and unsettling resemblance to Martin Sheen. Except for the fact that Martin Sheen can actually act.

The scariest part of this film is the realization that someone actually paid money to have this produced.

Save your money at the video store and rent the Ring instead.

Possibly the worst movie ever made. That is, if it was actually a movie, which it isn't. It seems more like some grad student's sad attempt to complete film school, by proving he could make a film on a $100 budget. The acting is atrocious, the writing nonsensical, and the FX laughable. The "house" which is supposed to be haunted is obviously a school, and only recently abandoned at that. The only thing truly scary about this movie was that I paid $3 to see it. A truly abysmal attempt, without even the usual gratuitous sex to liven it up. Avoid it at all costs.

Hell Asylum has a similar storyline to HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL, but don't expect it to be as entertaining. A group of young girls enter a haunted house in participation in a reality television show, if they last the night, they will recieve a million dollars. That's the whole story. Hell Asylum even plays like a reality television show by filming from the diffrent cameras located in the house, which are all black and white and often very snowy, add to that, the house is always in darkness so we get some confusing hard to watch footage of the girls getting killed. The death scenes were very bloody but it was hard to tell what was happening because of the darkness and snowy picture. On the plus side the characters were very interesting, each girl had a very diffrent personality to the next and i would have been more interested in seeing how they got along some more, but the girls began getting killed one by one before they even had a chance to settle in. My rating 4/10.

i can't believe there are actually people who will give "hell asylum" a 10/10. you can try to praise that these people made the movie on a low budget and in about 10 days of filming, but that's it. the acting is sooo bad, the camera work sucks, the lights work is awful except for two or three details, and you miss most of the action because it's too dark, the ghosts are laughable at and you end up hating every and each of the five contestants. leaving aside that's it's a "house on the haunted hill" rip-off, "hell asylum" is plain boring and you only laugh with that guy who is supposed to play the fake ghosts of the house to scare the chicks. in my opinion it might have been a little more decent if at least they had tried to find a set which resembles more a haunted house, but the place looks like a high school and you wonder where those stupid teenagers might have been hidden. nice try, but i'm sorry, i don't buy this. i gave it a 2/10.