Krocodylus

Standard "paint-by-numbers" monster fare, filled with a bunch of routine plot devices from big-creature movies. It's like somebody had a deck of cards with plot ideas from other movies written on them, which were shuffled, and dealt. Whatever plot lines and characters came up in the deal were then tossed into the script.

Characters are so cliché-ridden, that you can play a game of "Guess who ends up as a monster meal" after less than ten minutes into the movie, and probably get every single one right--including the order that they will get devoured. Many of the characters are so obnoxious, that you root for the creature to shut them up. Some of the main characters include: a Billy Idol clone who surfs with sharks, a loudmouth brat who flashes bankrolls, a Capt. Ahab guy with a vendetta, and Ahab's girlfriend who does sleazy dances at a bar. Oh, and a big, big beast in need of anger management therapy.

Along the way, people argue a lot, pretty girls run around with wet t-shirts, couples make out on exotic beaches, explosions occur, ruins of a shrine appear, and greasy-faced pirates drop by.

Amusing, for the most part, but one thing bothered me: the callousness by characters when other people were killed. After one violent demise, they make one-liner jokes. I could almost hear rim shots.

Overall, OK, if you have 90 minutes to waste, and you want to laugh at a so-bad-it's-good-movie. Otherwise, you may want to skip this one.

Blood Surf... It still isn't the best crocodile movie i've seen but enjoyable for the sport of surfing on shark infested waters and staying trapped in an island with a giant crocodile. Of course the effects are bad, and the mechanical beast is not to bad, it only looks like a rubber crocodile. And the croc as blue eyes, Strange did you ever seen a crocodile with blue eyes? I guess not. And why all that porno stuff was it to entertain or to only burn time in the film to look like a long movie. Some scenes in the movie that I asked my self somme questions where: The scene when the boat is sinking and the croc appears, the croc bites that guy in half and guy is still alive! And there was no blood dripping, strange. Another one is when those two girls crossed the river the crocodile stopped chasing them, why? Do crocodiles don't know how to swim? or was it scared of the water? Actually I don't know. The actors and actresses acted a bit bad but personally it wasn't that bad, and the story where was it? So after saying all this I am still looking for it on DVD, Because I even liked the damned movie. I don't know why but I like it. 6/10

Fans of creature feature films have to endure a lot of awful movies lately. Blood Surf shamelessly joins the list of stupid, redundant pulp-horror titles about ridiculously big animals that want to turn the food chain upside down. Crocodiles are particularly successful as we already had to struggle our way through the abysmal 'Crocodile' (directed by a disappointing Tobe Hooper) and 'Lake Placid'. Blood Surf is every bit as bad as these other films and – on top of that – it likes to exaggerate tremendously. The saltwater-crocodile supposedly is 90 years old, over 30 ft long (!) and it kills for fun! During the film, he amuses himself by devouring a bunch of utterly stupid surfer-dudes & dudettes who came to seek new thrills by surfing in a shark-congested area. The only beautiful aspect about this film is the tropical location. Even though it's a completely inappropriate setting for a film like this, the lagoons and nature looks marvelous. Every other aspect is simply disastrous. There's a quite a bit of gore but it all looks fake and laughable. The dialogues are downright painful to listen to! You won't believe some of the lines these actors have to say! I know surfers are supposed to be a mentally underdeveloped group but I hope for their own sake they're not that stupid! Early in the film, one of the characters refers to Jaws as being a 'mechanical toy' but the croc here looks at least 10 times less real than Spielberg's great white shark. The visual effects in 'Blood Surf' are amateurish and the massacres fail to impress. I won't say too much about the acting since it's secondary in flicks like this. The girls look sexy in wet shirts and their boobs joyfully bounce while running away from the beast. You guessed right: Blood Surf is a very bad film. So bad it becomes fun again. But 'funny' for a whole other reason than James Hickox intended.

I have to say it: if the Sci-fi channel can't find anything even moderately worthwhile to fill time slots, they should just let the screen go blank for a couple of hours. I find it hard to comment on this vile effort without resorting to long strings of four-letter words. If not for the scenery--both topographical and feminine--this would easily be in the running for the WORST MOVIE EVER.

Bad acting, stupid plot, inane characters... Even Nancy Reagan would have relented, and advised the perps to "just say yes"; being doped to the gills could only have resulted in a vastly improved flick.

Don't watch it.

Don't watch it.

Whatever you do, DON'T WATCH IT.

I love monster movies. As long as they aren't boring I can always have some fun with them. This film is not boring. It has beautiful women, a recklessly brave heroine, the ocean, surfing, sharks, lots of "croc fodder", explosions.. it works! Of course it is flawed in many and humorous ways. Much of the acting, and most of the directing leave one aghast. But a real monster film fan will find something to enjoy. I enjoyed Kate Fischer immensely; even her acting,which was compelling. I enjoyed the action, and the crocodile chasing everyone around on land and sea. Some of the special effects were actually thrilling. The surfing scene is certainly worth seeing.

Yes, I knew everything that was going to happen before it did. I knew who was going to get eaten, and approximately when. But it still intrigued me enough to keep me watching. And that's all a monster film has to do. I might even want to get a video of it. Did I say that?