Knightmare

The helmet that the person wore enabled the 'dungeon' to be a complete CGI/matte creation. Usually the rooms were just CGI moving blocks that could kill the player, but in the later series, they became far more advanced. However, the prizes were really pants, usually just a metal plaque or something. I really wanted to be on Knightmare as a kid!

I have weird memories of this show. Like many childhood shows that go unseen for many years afterwards, time fogs the memory and the fondness that we look back on simpler times tend to infect other things we remember from the same period. For Knightmare my memory is also touched by the fact that for years my mother strongly disapproved of her children watching this show. A Northern Ireland Protestant woman, anything that suggest the occult, witchcraft, spells and so on was to be frowned upon so the idea of children being sent into a world of dragons, skulls, spells and so on was clearly not going to be anything suitable for kids.

However we did watch it anyway with her occasional tut-tutting in the background and generally it was pretty enjoyable stuff. Nowadays the special effects will look ridiculous and even at the time they weren't brilliant but they were still pretty good for the time. The idea of the show was basically Dungeons and Dragons. Of a team of children, one would don a helmet that covered their eyes totally and wandered off into a green-screen room, while the rest of the team stay with the Dungeon Master and watch on a TV that is where the effects are added. Considering it was in the mid 1980's, it was actually pretty smart and innovative to set a gameshow in a virtual world. Sure it was clunky and the performances of the actors playing the various goblins etc were mostly hammy as hell but it worked for a kids audience mainly by virtue of being different and imaginative in concept and delivery.

It would probably be terrible rubbish if I tried to watch it now, but then why would I watch it now? Of its time so it was and the fact that I remember it clearly as something that I enjoyed showed how well orientated to its target audience it was and how effective it was even if eight seasons of it was probably pushing its luck!

Well what is there to say about Knightmare? It was a kids TV programme/game show broadcast here in the UK. A team of teenagers would attempt to conquer the dungeons of doom by sending in the bravest among them into the dungeon... however there was a minor twist, the adventurer entering the dungeon had to wear a helmet which completely stops him from seeing anything except the exact spot where he was (so he could pick up and look at items he found etc) - the rest of the team had the arduous task of guiding him to safety by telling him which way to go.

Memorable aspects:

1) The "energy" of the adventurer is displayed as a helmed head, and as time progresses or danger threatens pieces of the helmet begin to strip off... then pieces of flesh and the finally pieces of the skull... the last thing to go is a pair of (by then) floating eyes and thats game over... you can replenish your energy by placing food in your knapsack.

2) spellcasting... sometimes you could answer challenges set by "nice" characters met in the dungeon and they would give you a spell... to spell you literally had to spell... "Spellcasting... S.. L.. E.. E.. P.." kinda thing...

3) big clanking gears and cogs and things and if the hapless adventurer missed his footing... well bye bye...

4) At the end of each episode a gong would sound and the team of teenagers would freeze in time until the next episode...

5) Tregard the dungeon master... a bearded rogue-ish looking fellow who would add strange cryptic comments after the team had frozen at the end of an episode.

6) Some random jester type blokey who I don't remember anything about except he was annoying...

7) Random evil-blokey (Lord Fear) who would just strut around and look menacing... usually only seen in a crystal ball..

8) Crystal balls where the foe would announce his master plan and give some sort of a hint before leering menacingly towards the adventurers at which point they would all panick and shout "drop it... drop it..."

9) The comments by the characters after you have answered one of their questions... "Truth accepted!" if it was correct... "Falsehood!" if it was wrong...

It was a very bizarre but yet strangely amusing programme (and completely non-violent... If I recall correctly the hero would die instantly if he attempted to brandish a weapon)... it was made into a computer game for several platforms at the time, and remade as a RPG for the Amiga a few years on, but none of these managed to capture the atmosphere of the programme...

Who didn't want to be on Knightmare???? Everyone I know who was a kid in the 80's wanted to be on it. Although not many applied as no one ever wanted to wear the helmet. The classic lines of "where am I?" that followed the entry into every room by the contestant's. "Temporal disruption imminent!" That preceded the end of the show. "Enter stranger" which invited the new contestants in. For the time it was really advanced and had everything a kid needed in a TV program it made you think (with it's riddles) it made you shout at the people involved "No not there! there's a spider" and last but not least the feeling of adventure!!! It looks a little tired now with dodgy CGI but it's still my favourite show from when i was a kid.

10. The Antechamber. This is the room where Treguard, his assistant and the advisers would spend the entire quest, watching over the dungeoneer.

9. Level 1 Clue Room. Consisted of a table with several objects on it, of which the dungeoneer could only take a maximum of 2, and usually a wall monster who would ask the dungeoneer a question or two before they were allowed to take any objects.

8. The Room of Choice. Usually the first room in the dungeon. A rotating disc with four doors with logos above them. Adventurers would have to choose which quest to go for out of the crown, the goblet, the shield and the sword.

7. Smirkenorff's flight. Not really a room as such, but as the series went on and the adventure branched out beyond the confines of the dungeon a new method of travelling between levels 1 and 2 was required (in earlier series this involved the dungeoneer climbing into a well). Smirkenorff was a large friendly dragon who would fly dungeoneers between the two levels, for a small fee.

6. The Catacombite room. A large chamber containing a gigantic monster. The Catacombite was a large skull with two massive legs made of bone. Id the dungeoneer came into contact with this terrifying (well, terrifying when you're seven years old) monster it would mean instant death.

5. Merlin's Chamber. Basically exactly how it sounds. A large-ish room with walls lined with books and a chair in the middle. Adventurers would have to work out how to summon Merlin, who would then give them magic in return for them answering a few riddles.

4. The Cogs of Doom. Timing was of major importance when crossing the cogs of doom, as the path only stayed intact for a few seconds. Advisors would have to guide the dungeoneer across two giant cogs without him/her falling into the pit below.

3. The Beast's Stomach. Perhaps the most disgusting room. Sometimes a dungeoneer would somehow end up swallowed by a snake or another monster and not die. Instead they would come here. There is only one way out of this place (well, two ways I suppose, but we won't go into that) and the adventurers would have to work out how to give the monster an "upset stomach". This usually involved throwing salt down or rubbing the stomach lining with soap.

2. Causeways. There were hexagonal blocks reaching across a large chasm. The blocks would have symbols or numbers on them to tell the adventurers which blocks were safe to step on and which would send them plummeting downwards into oblivion. Usually the dungeoneer would have been told the proper combination earlier, in exchange for giving a character an object, answering a riddle or through the use of a spyglass. The combinations often ranged from the relatively easy (earth, fire, wind, water) to the insanely hard (removing a piece of a shape in each tile to work out which way it was pointing). Needless to say, many dungeoneers failed thanks to these devilish rooms.

1. The Corridoor of Blades. Imagine this: You're standing on a conveyor belt heading down a narrow corridoor. Suddenly, a large circular buzzsaw sticks out of the wall to your left. You narrowly miss it by jumping out the way, then find you have to dive underneath another one that has suddenly appeared on the right. Now imagine you're doing this blindfolded and are relying on three panicky fools to warn you when and where the blades are coming, and you have The Corridoor of Blades.

In my opinion these are the most memorable rooms in the history of Knightmare. You may disagree, if so then why don't you post yours up here as well?